Originally published June 12, 2023

   You know what grinds my gears? The current hysteria over Chat GPT. 

  Suddenly, everyone's acting like AI language models are the latest celebrity scandal. People are wringing their hands, clutching their pearls, and lamenting the end of human communication as we know it. But come on, folks, let's take a deep breath and bring out the rationality, shall we?

   First, have you ever actually had a conversation with Chat GPT? Sure, it can generate some amusing responses, but let's not forget that it's still just lines of code running on a computer. It's not about to rise up and conquer the world. I mean, have you ever tried asking it about the meaning of life? It's more likely to respond with a knock-knock joke than enlighten you with profound wisdom.

   Secondly, the idea that Chat GPT is going to replace human interaction is downright ludicrous. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have a heart-to-heart chat with a friend over a cup of coffee than engage in a textual exchange with a bot. No offense, Chat GPT, but you're just not that charming.

   Finally, let's not forget that this technology has its limitations. Chat GPT may be able to simulate conversation, but it lacks true understanding and empathy. It's like talking to an alien who's read every book in the world but has no actual life experience. Sometimes, you just need a human touch, a listening ear, or a shoulder to cry on.

   So, my dear friends, let's not get carried away with the hysteria. Chat GPT is a fun and interesting tool, but it's not going to steal our social lives or turn us into hermit-like beings. Let's embrace the human connection, celebrate our quirks, and remember that true communication goes beyond the realm of algorithms and text on a screen. 

   And that's what grinds my gears. *Totally, NOT 100% ChatGPT generated content.

   You know what really grinds my gears? Pajama bottoms at school. 

   Pajama bottoms, pants, slippers, etc. are for getting cozy and lounging on your couch or bed at home. Unless ASB has made pajamas a theme for spirit wear during spirit week, I think wearing them outside of your home to school is tacky and uncalled for. 

   You want to be cozy at school? Find yourself a cute pair of jogger sweats or literally any other kind of sweat pants that isn't clearly meant for bed time. 

   And that's what really grinds my gears this year. 

   You know what grinds my gears? Apathetic students. 

   Students with potential who choose to not challenge themselves. What compounds the apathy, and really pushes the bamboo shoots under my nails is when the lazy groaner is willing to put forth an argumentative effort; just to avoid the challenge of learning. I mean, really? 

   The droner will actually think through a baseless, deductive argument and get themselves worked up in a nonsensical rabbit hole; spending more time avoiding the task at hand than it would have actually taken to just complete the learning task in the first place. 

   Shia Labeouf stated an important message to consider the next time you try to avoid a challenge. “JUST DO IT!” Apathetic students remind me of toddlers who throw tantrums in the middle of the grocery store. They need to be dragged through the store, and then picked up kicking, flailing, and screaming. 

   I wish the apathetic, arguing student could see that they are just as embarrassing and annoying as a whiny little brat in the grocery store when they choose to waste the lives of their 30 classmates and their teacher while being an educational ignoramus. 

   At some point in the future of mankind, apathetic students who choose to waste their potential will be parted out like old Buicks, so their unused potential can be given to children who are willing to do their best and try every day.

   And that is what grinds my gears.

    You know what grinds my gears? Those weird squeezy stress balls filled with Orbeez. 

   They may be great for helping deal with anxiety or increasing your focus, but they make a hideous squelching sound every time you clench them. 

   As someone with ADHD, I understand how important it is to have something to fidget with, but there are so many other devices you can use that work just as well. Regular stress balls are excellent, though I understand they’re often more tough than you would want and your hands get exhausted before your brain’s decided you’ve fidgeted enough. 

   Fidget cubes have multiple fidget options, pop sockets are satisfying to pull and push on, or you could even just hold a pen and tap it into your hand under your desk! 

   Even Mr. Cowan’s mechatronics class teaches you how to make your own fidget spinner. If you bring ingenuity to the table you can even get an A+ on fidgetonomy!

   I just implore you to please save our ears the trouble, and leave your orbeez-filled squeezables on your shelf at home. The noise they make is gross, distracting, and gives me goosebumps any time a student pulls one out from their backpack!

And that’s what grinds my gears!

     "Holy snot, Batman! You know what grinds my gears?"

   "No, Robin, I don't. And, quite frankly, I don't...

   (Interrupting Batman) "The playoffs!"

   "The playoffs?"

  "The NBA playoffs."

  "So, Robin, what grinds your gears about the NBA playoffs?"

  "The Booger Cam! It's like the Kiss Cam only the Booger Cam doesn't show couples picking goobers."

  "Robin, I'm warning you."

   "Hear me out, Batman. It's when a player steps up to the free throw line and the camera gets an up-close shot of their face. And that's when it hits you."

  "What hits you, Robin?"

   "The booger, Batman. Don't you see? 

   "See what?"

   "Exactly! You can see right in their snoot. A greenie. A bogey. And the player doesn't even know it's there!"

   "Robin!"

   "Well, it's the truth, Batman. And that's what grinds my gears."