Agata Boldok Narrative

World War II. A disaster demonstrating only the worst possible side of humanity. An apocalyptic war which included millions of casualties as well as an unforgivable Holocaust which resulted in the destruction of many future generations. The few who were targeted during the Nazi invasion and survived have let their stories echo through the years, never forgetting them. Mrs. Agata Boldok, a Holocaust survivor, is one of those few who survived. She grew up in hiding, without parents, family, or love. To force a human to endure this misfortune is an unforgivable crime. She was robbed of her safety and of her basic needs. However she never lingers on what the Nazi's have done to her. With a mixture of luck and skill of surviving, Mrs. Agata Boldok made it though one of the most disastrous historical events ever and she came out with one thing in mind. She will never forget what the Nazis have done but she will never nurture the hatred for them. "Those who hold grudges against others destroy themselves."

Before the war Mrs. Agata Boldok lived a regular life. She lived in a home like everyone else, went to school like everyone else and was a child like every other child. She could not distinguish a difference between herself and the rest of the people around her. Therefore it was an immense shock to her when one day her parents told her that they had to move to the Warsaw Ghetto because they were Jewish. She could not comprehend why she and her family were treated this way; in her eyes she wore the same clothes and acted the same way as all the other people around her.

In the Warsaw Ghetto Mrs. Agata Boldok lived through unspeakable horrors. Rounding every corner one found starvation, sickness and death. Mrs. Agata Boldok’s flashbacks of her life in the ghetto terrified our group. An example of a terrible scene that came in mind to our interviewee is the following: One day Mrs. Agata Boldok was walking down a ghetto street and saw a horse being torn up for food. Such vicious events filled the everyday thoughts of the inhabitants of the Warsaw Ghetto and contributed to their utterly terrible and miserable lives. Although life in the ghetto was despicable, one could most probably survive if one had a family left. However, this was different for Mrs. Agata Boldok. She was relocated in the Warsaw Ghetto together with her family. Unfortunately though, one day her father and sister simply disappeared. Mrs. Agata Boldok and her mother had no idea what had happened to them, and don’t know to this day. As Mrs. Agata Boldok stated herself, it is extremely hard to live with no knowledge of what happened to those who were one’s dearest.

However awful the situation was, Mrs. Agata Boldok always kept her head up. She managed to survive this extremely challenging situation and kept on living as best she could. After some time in the ghetto, our interviewee can’t remember how long, Mrs. Agata Boldok and her mother escaped through a hole in the ghetto wall. The escapade took place at night. As a young child, Mrs. Boldok recalls being scared to go through the dark and cramped hole. She could not understand the benefit of passing it. Therefore she was pushed through, against her own will. From then on Mrs. Agata Boldok has been claustrophobic.

At first mother and daughter escaped to live with relatives in the countryside. This is where Mrs. Agata Boldok started suffering from a complete mental breakdown, worse than any starvation and fear she had ever known. Having lost two of her family members and having seen unspeakable horrors Mrs. Boldok had already gone through a trauma, as she can’t remember much from her years in the ghetto. Now, as the nightmares of the ghetto were gone for the time being, Mrs. Boldok could finally take a deep breath. She could finally reflect upon what had happened. Already at ten years of age Mrs. Agata Boldok had seen and experienced what no human being should have to live through. What worsened our interviewee’s then current situation was the case of her mother. Mrs. Agata Boldok’s mother was always on the move, leaving her daughter at different relatives’ houses every few weeks or months. One time, during one of the mother’s excursions, she was caught. At the end of the war our interviewee found out her mother had been taken to Ravensbruck and died not long after the liberation.

With her mother gone Mrs. Agata Boldok had really no place to go, and no one to take care of her. At this point Mrs. Boldok’s mental anguish was at its greatest. She was very depressed over her latest family loss and that combined with the breakdown completely defeated her. With no love and no affection as well as no one to turn to, Mrs. Agata Boldok found herself in an orphanage. This orphanage was driven by nuns, and this is where our interviewee started following the path of religion. From her early years she remembers her family being Atheists. All the same, she was familiar with the Christian religion as her family’s housewife, who was supposed to take Mrs. Boldok for walks, took her to Mass instead. Therefore, with the support of the nuns and with a need for expressing her feelings to a higher power, Mrs. Agata Boldok became somewhat religious. This was her way of freeing herself from the immense burden placed on her shoulders; this was her way of escaping from the terrible reality.

As time passed though, more and more Jews were being deported to concentration camps the safety of Mrs. Agata Boldok decreased. One day a German officer entered the orphanage. He ordered the nuns to take out all the Jews and turn them over to the Germans. The nuns never did so, sparing Mrs. Boldok’s life. However, that night, to avoid further trouble, they asked our interviewee to leave the orphanage. Mrs. Agata Boldok left and ended up in a home for the elderly. For weeks she had to hide under a grandma’s bed during the day, and was only allowed out during the night. One day though she could no longer endure lying under the bed. She decided to get out and move around a little bit. Upon exiting the elderly home a woman saw her. This woman started shouting: “JEW! JEW! TAKE HER TO THE POLICE STATION!”. Filled with panic Mrs. Agata Boldok quickly ran away from the woman. She could not return to the elderly home, because the woman had seen her exit it. Thus, Mrs. Agata Boldok returned to the nun orphanage. Luckily enough, the nuns accepted her again.

One day of Mrs. Boldok’s life in the orphanage was particularly memorable and imprinted itself in her memory. The nuns were out and the children were left alone. Something was needed, although Mrs. Boldok can’t remember what. As the oldest child at eleven years of age, Mrs. Boldok was supposed to acquire this item. Standing in the main square, she suddenly noticed the door leading to the house of her relatives. Compelled by a feeling of home-sickness and a need to see something familiar, our Mrs. Boldok approached the door. Suddenly she noticed the reflection of an SS officer in the glass of the pharmacy next to the door. She also felt the breath of a dog on her feet. For what felt like ages, the two stood staring at each other. Suddenly, the SS officer whipped her around and asked. “Jude?”, meaning “Jew” in English. Functioning on instincts, Mrs. Boldok answered “Javol!” (“Yes!”). The direct answer caught him by surprise and saved her life. Mrs. Agata Boldok was only told to walk away. Having returned to the orphanage she didn’t want to unveil the story to the nuns; however she felt a need to express herself and therefore shared the story. The nuns told Mrs. Agata Boldok that she was very lucky, because that particular SS officer was especially cruel. He was known for taking Jewish children by the legs and beating their skulls against buildings. It was a miracle that she was saved as Mrs. Agata Boldok said herself.

Our interviewee spent the rest of the time, until the end of the war, in the orphanage. The ghetto and war had completely changed her life. The horrors, despair and cruelty that our interviewee had witnessed altered her from a young girl to an old woman in just a matter of a few years. Mrs. Boldok, as well as the whole rest of the Jewish population, had not deserved any such treatment, that the Nazis carried out on them. The Jews had changed from feeling like people into feeling like animals, living only on their survival instincts.

After the war, Mrs. Agata Boldok enrolled in fifth grade because she had not attended school at all during the war. At this time our interviewee had nothing, absolutely nothing. During the interview, and still now, it was extremely hard for us to understand the concept of nothing. We don’t even devote a single thought to not having the basic needs of every human, while at the end of the war Mrs. Agata Boldok only owned the clothes she had on. Besides looking at materialistic things, Mrs. Agata Boldok did not even have her parents or siblings around. Although deprived of her basic needs, Mrs. Boldok managed to resurrect the optimism she inherited from her father and sought to break the chains of her childhood madness.

Mrs. Boldok strived to free herself from memories and feelings of her past by trying to forget the terrible events that had occurred during the war. She even tried escaping from her roots, trying to leave her past behind. However, the older Mrs. Boldok became, the more she understood what had happened during the war. It therefore became harder and harder to ignore reality. As an adult in a modern and completely new world, Mrs. Boldok came face to face with reality and realized she cannot continue viewing her heritage as an obstacle and neither can she escape from her past. As a result Mrs. Boldok calmed down, accepted her situation and became a pleasant and social woman, of which she is very proud. Even though Mrs. Boldok now lives a peaceful life, thoughts of her past never linger far away. Often our interviewee can wonder about her parents and how her life would have looked like with them around. As a group we admired Mrs. Boldok’s bravery and strong will to continue to live, although she had already lost all things of value to her 65 years ago. We doubted if we would have survived the same dreadful situations Mrs. Boldok had found herself in as a child.

Learning about the terrible Second World War and unforgivable Holocaust left our whole group horrified and confused. We could not understand how people would want to carry out murder, on other people just like them, except they believed a different faith.. It amazed us how many of the Nazis could heartlessly commit terrible crimes to Jews, and how they managed to live without guilt. Therefore our bewilderment rose to a completely new level when Mrs. Agata Boldok explained to us that she didn’t hate the Germans for what they did. It is understandable she doesn’t hate the nation today, but how can she not hate those who committed the terrible crimes towards her and the whole Jewish people? As we were told, Mrs. Boldok does not forgive them; however she does not hate them. In our times we can quarrel and fight about the smallest things, while Mrs. Boldok doesn’t even hate the people who completely ruined her life. Together with Mrs. Boldok, our group concluded that hate is a feeling that boundlessly devours people, and that one should never hate. Mrs. Boldok, having lived through all this, proved to us that by not holding grudges, she was able to not only survive this experience, but also live a normal life.