Funny Sayings
Sign in a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!!"
At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
" In a restaurant window: "Eat now, pay waiter."
Sign on a retail store door in Stevens Point, WI:
"PUSH. If it doesn't open, PULL. If it still doesn't open, WE ARE CLOSED."
Sign in school near clock: "Time will pass; will you?"
On a display of "I love you only" Valentine cards: "Now available in multi-packs."
Sign in a dentist's office: "Patient parking only. All others will be painfully extracted."
Outside a country shop: "We buy junk and sell antiques."
Brochure for mountain cabin rentals: "Lovely honeymoon cabin . . . . sleeps 8"
A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O'Hare Field in Chicago: "Do not activate with wet hands."
In a Maine restaurant: "Open 7 days a week and weekends."
In the vestry of a New England church: "Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished."
On a plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
" Seen on a billboard along a highway: "Caution: Objects in the mirror may have flunked driver's education."
...