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Counselor's Corner

March 30-April 3

Theme of the Week: Change

Change is something that is constantly happening, some changes are big and some are small. The small ones pass us by without a second thought, but when big changes hit they can be difficult to navigate. When a big change comes our way instead of focusing on solving everything at once simply focus on what the next thing is your should do. When we don’t have answers for all of our questions we can calm our anxiety and stress by only focusing on “the next thing”. “The next thing” doesn’t require perfection and may not be what others are telling you to do. It might just be “the next thing” for you and your family. Be careful not to compare yourself to the “parenting” you see on Social Media. Remind yourself that it is a highlight reel of a person’s day. Change isn’t always easy in the moment, but can produce beautiful things. With all of the changes that are happening right now, we need to help children identify and understand the feelings that they might be having during this time.

Integrating the theme into the Home:

Remind your children of big changes that they have gone through in the past.

- Identify ways they got through those changes in the past.
- Focus on the positive outcomes from previous changes.

Watch for signs of stress in yourself and your children.
- - For those who communicate stress through behavior.
    - When you notice behavior changes in your child have them identify what they are feeling.
    - Behavior changes to look for:
      - Increased frustration or anger
      - Increased silliness and hyperactivity
      - Withdrawing from family
      - Increased drama and exaggeration
      - Unable to make decisions
      - Negative self-talk
      - Complaining of stomach aches or headaches
      - Bed wetting
      - Difficulty sleeping
      - Sleeping all day

Identify wise steps to take during this time of change.

Creating fun new ways to say “Hi”, “Goodbye”, “I love you”, etc.

Singing a favorite song with your child while washing hands for 20 seconds

Coughing into our elbows

Spending time at home engaged in family activities

Avoid using fear statements –
- Instead of saying “wash your hands or you will get sick” say “we should wash our hands regularly for good hygiene”.
  - Limit exposure to news media (including social media) and be aware of the sites your child is visiting.

Establish a New Normal
- Implement a schedule that works for your family.
- Normalize things as much as possible.
- Focus on the positive things of the New Normal.

For those who communicate stress through words:

When your children say they are “stressed” have them identify the emotion they are feeling.

This is not a natural activity and may take time for your children to get used to.

If your child says “I don’t know” tell them “I would really like to know how you are feeling. When you figure it out please let me know”.

For younger children you may have to give them examples of feelings words –

- Use your own stress during this time as an example.
  - When I said I was “stressed” yesterday what I was really saying is “I’m tired and feeling overwhelmed at the moment”.
    1. Being able to communicate what we are really feeling allows us to process those thoughts and emotions.
    2. Parenting with wisdom and not through fear.

ADDITIONAL TECHNOLOGY APPS/RESOURCES

Breathe2Relax is a portable stress management tool which provides detailed information on the effects of stress on the body and instructions and practice exercises to help users learn the stress management skill called diaphragmatic breathing.

Calm is another mindfulness app. These guided meditations are perfect for complete novices through seasoned practitioners, and you have your pick when it comes to how long you can dedicate to the app each day. In addition to an assortment of daily meditations, Calm features nature sounds and sleep stories.

Stop, Breathe, and Think is your daily mindfulness app that also prompts you to input how you’re feeling. Select your mood when you open the app and it will suggest the meditations, yoga sequences, or acupressure that could serve you best in that moment, from deep breathing exercises to body scans to visualizations. The check-in feature also allows you to track your moods and progress, so you can examine what you feel most and focus on taming or understanding those anxieties better.

What’s Up? uses techniques from both Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Acceptance Commitment Therapy to help users cope with issues like anxiety, depression, and anger. The app offers a diary feature with a scale for rating your emotions, a “catastrophe scale” to help you put problems in perspective, breathing techniques, and an interactive question game to keep you feeling grounded during stressful moments.

Mindshift app helps manage and decrease anxiety for people of all ages, and is used across the world.

Colorfy Pouring your attention into the beautiful designs can distract from your anxious thoughts and help calm you down.

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