The Spectrum of Sunlight and Self
In the quiet chaos of my lab at IIT Madras, I spent my days studying plasmonic nanoparticles, tiny entities that respond to sunlight in strange and beautiful ways. When sunlight strikes them, they don’t just passively sit there. They choose. They absorb, reflect, and transmit depending on their size, shape, and material.
It took me months to master the science. But somewhere along the way, I realized: these particles were teaching me about life.
At IIT Madras, we’re all exposed to our own version of a spectrum. The spectrum of experiences. The highs of breakthroughs and the lows of failed simulations. The warmth of friendships, the sharpness of solitude. The pressure of deadlines, the freedom of discovery. Each moment hits us like a different wavelength of light, and like those nanoparticles, we learn to respond.
Some things, I’ve learned to absorb and let them shape me. The lessons from my guide, who never gave up on me, even when I was ready to give up on myself. The kindness of friends who showed up with a cup of chai when I didn’t even ask. The humility that comes from realizing that no matter how much you know, there’s always more to learn. These are the moments I’ve allowed into my core because they changed me for the better.
Some things, I’ve learned to transmit to let pass through me without holding on. The fear of falling short. The sting of criticism. The weight of comparisons. They no longer stick; they stay only as long as I need to acknowledge them, then I let them go. Because not everything that comes your way deserves to stay.
And then, there are the things I’ve learned to scatter laughter in the middle of chaos, unexpected ideas in a brainstorming session, or encouragement offered to someone else struggling with their own experiment. Light isn’t just something you take in. Sometimes, you reflect it back into the world.
This campus, with its wandering deer, shaded pathways, and stubborn monkeys, has been more than a backdrop. It’s been a witness. To my frustrations, my growth, my quiet triumphs. To the version of me who walked in years ago, and to the version who now walks out a little wiser, a lot more grateful.
Research taught me patience. IIT Madras taught me perspective.
As I pack up my memories and prepare to leave, I carry with me the most important equation I’ve learned here, not from any textbook, but from life:
Absorb what helps you grow. Transmit what weighs you down. Scatter kindness like sunlight. Whether you’re a nanoparticle or a postgraduate, the light will keep coming. What matters is what you choose to become in response.
write up by
Sai Teja Banala ( Yearbook class of 2025 )
