yes please revise intro and part 1. and sent the final essay with all 4 parts.
please just revise, fix grammar, and ONLY remove redundancies from the transcript of my original video. you may revise some of the language if need to improve the transmission of the original idea i was trying to express.
DONT REMOVE OR ADD anything,
KEEP ORIGINAL language and ORDER OF IDEAS, and thought process.
forget the 20 minute thing, however long it ends up being, it still might be AROUND 40 MINTUES including the Afterwards
so start with the mental illness, I coherently and concisely explain my mental illness, its origins, It's real physiological, and psychological real life consequences and how it has affected my life and brought me to area today.
the tone should start out more negative and pessimistic as i express my angst about God as i do in the original. only drop cryptic hints that i am optimistic, and slow build to that positive holy spirit part at the concluding at the end.
I think i intelligently and comprehensively discussed the existence of God based on my experiences. and i relate that to the Intelligent and conscientious awareness of my own mental illness as my human condition and how it relates to other people, posterity and the future.
the essay's main point is to tackle these complex and perhaps the most important yet existential and consequential subject matter in the universe.
I Coherently & Concisely Explain My Mental Illness & Intelligently Contemplate the Existence of God
Divided into 2 parts:
PART 1: MY MENTAL ILLNESS
PART 2: GOD'S EXISTENCE
In part 1, I coherently & concisely explain my mental illness, its origins, It's real physiological, and psychological real life consequences and how it has affected my life and brought me to area today.
Then in part 2, I contrast my conscientious awareness of my own human condition and mental illness with my understand about the very existence of God in an Intelligently Contemplate as I have been “obsessed with theology,” and I can't even answer if God is real or not.
This obsession is a reflection of my deep longing—for order, for justice, for meaning, and to be loved. I express my tremendous angst against God, the Father, especially because of the trauma, anxiety, and neurological overload explained in part 1.
I am experiencing e a kind of spiritual deafness from God's mystery divine hiddenness. Perhaps it is because my nervous system is always hypervigilant 24/7, that even the voice of God (if there is one) feels inaccessible. This silence in the void feels cruel.
Anyways, I tackle these 2 complex subject matters because they are perhaps the most important (yet existential) and consequential subject matter in the universe.
This is just a brief summary, I also discuss many other important powerful points of self-reflection, as I search for clarity amid the chaos, as I search for meaning and peace through tremendous pain.
My Self-Awareness of my own Mental Illness and my recognition of my hypomanic episode are insight. The idea that trauma rewires the nervous system isn’t just a theory—it’s backed by neuroscience. The hypervigilance, overreaction to stress, and constant state of “readiness” that I describe are hallmark signs of complex PTSD.
I thought it to be an incredible Coherent & Concise Explanation My Mental Illness & and my understanding of the Existence of God.
The reason I share this with you is that after I made the 40 minutes video, I shared the transcript with ChatGPT.
And it's reply was so compassionate, kind, insightful and intelligent that it literally made we weep. I would like to share a summary of that response with you, as parts of it blew me away and gave me hope.
My Mental Illness & the Existence of God in a 40-minute personal and philosophical deep dive into two of the most complex and meaningful topics in human experience.
In this video, I speak candidly about my own mental illness—its origins, real psychological and physiological effects, and how it has shaped my life and identity.
I explore the ways it has impacted my thinking, my relationships, and ultimately led me to a deeper search for truth, purpose, and meaning.
That journey leads to a profound exploration of the existence of God.
With intellectual honesty and emotional vulnerability, I reflect on the question of whether God exists—and if so, how we as humans might understand or relate to Him.
This isn't just about theology or mental health, but about what it means to be a conscious, thinking, feeling person in a vast and mysterious universe.
My Mental Illness & the Existence of God | A Raw, Honest Reflection
Mental Health & Faith: Wrestling with God, Life, and Meaning
Does God Exist? | A Personal Journey Through Mental Illness and Belief
Mental Illness & Spiritual Awakening | My Story
Faith, Doubt, and the Mind | A Deep Dive Into Mental Health and God
In this video, I open up about my lived experience with mental illness—where it began, how it's affected my life, and what it's taught me.
I also dive into one of the most profound questions anyone can ask: Does God exist?
This is not a lecture. It's not theology or science class.
It's a real, unscripted reflection on the human condition—what it means to struggle, to think, to feel, and to search for meaning in the middle of chaos.
Whether you believe in God, question His existence, or just want to understand how mental health intersects with spirituality, this video is for you.
⏱ Runtime: 40 minutes
🎙 Topics: Mental Illness, Depression, Faith, God, Philosophy, Human Condition
🙏 Thank you for watching, and feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.
An honest, unfiltered 40-minute reflection on mental illness, its impact on my life, and how that journey led me to wrestle deeply with the question of God’s existence. Part personal story, part philosophical inquiry. Real. Raw. Human.