Purpose in a meaningless Universe

Purpose in a meaningless Universe

Hello, and welcome back to the channel folks. I have something rather extraordinary to say right now, something not by any means unbelievably revolutionary or concepts that have never been heard of before, but  This is important and it's good and it's worthwhile.Listening to

Now just to preface this statement, I'm nobody special. I'm literally no one that matters.  At all to anybody.

I am a nobody.

And I have always had that strong sensation, that nothing I do matters, nobody really cares.\n I'm worthless, I have no value..

Now that said , even the lowest among us , sometimes comes up with something good , and that's what I wanna share with you here today.

As a rather unremarkable.\nOr particularly talented person. I do have a few rather impressive accomplishments that I have made in my life.

I do have a bachelor's degree in sociology and philosophy in a master's degree in clinical mental health counseling.

I am also a united states marine corps , veteran.

I fought in the war on terra in afghanistan in two thousand nine. Again, that's nothing too remarkable or special, because lots of people do that, but it was difficult and it was frightening, and it was honorable and it was national service to all the people of our country.  And that is at least noteworthy.

Anyways , as a not special unremarkable , just one human out of billions, given my unique circumstances and life experience mainly my higher education in the rather daunting and endlessly.  Complex field of psychology and philosophy. I have a few dare. I say, important and remarkable.\n Get humble intellectual contributions.  2\nMake to the world.

Even if no one ever hears me and I'm just shouting into the void.\nI am here and I do exist right now and I am alive.I haven't done anything too stupid to win myself.A darwin award and take me completely out of the gene pool.

I here I am writing what could possibly be interpreted.And just pure nonsense , have a few observations to share.

As a result of my intensive education and my situation, being a disabled veteran living alone I have had an extraordinary amount of time to agonize.  Aver.\n Some of the biggest concepts in all of science in the universe, from the quantum mechanics of the teeny, tiny small to the absolute enormousness of the  Universe , with its seemingly infinite number of galaxys and stars.

I acknowledge that this fight my terrible suffering , that is in no way unique to me as it is basically the essence of the human condition.

I recognize that I am in a tremendously.\n Blast situation of being a disabled veteran, and I have had the time that most people don't have, because they're toiling away at work or spending time with their families, they don't have time to think about these subjects as  They're busy living life.

I am grateful for the opportunity to be alive and have a home and food.\n And despite the agonizing pain\n Of agony, that characterizes my daily existence.  I am ultimately grateful.

I have had an enormous amount of time to contemplate.\n What are we even doing here as human beings? What is the purpose of life? What is the meaning of it all? What is true? What is real? What is valuable?  What is sacred who is God?What is love?What is intelligence?What does it mean to be mortal and to know\nThat death is inevitable for all of us.

What is the meaning of all this suffering? Does it really matter if gods real? Does that mean that heaven is a possible destination or even worse? Hell, or I'm not sure what is scarier. Nothing at all, just to disappear into the void.  Forever.

Most.\nPeople don't have the intellectual curiosity or courage to really examine what is life?What is death?I want matters and what doesn't.

Now, this is coming from A42-year-old man who suffered terrible childhood trauma and has honestly never felt loved or valued a day in my life, and I've never had the privilege of feeling safe or happy or content.  Not even a single day in my entire freaking life.

I noticed my lack of self-esteem and self-worth probably back even in my grade school days.\nAnd I didn't fully understand it , and I kind of just assumed that everybody felt that way.

And it is these very thoughts and feelings of my own worthless , lessness , that makes the entire point of what i'm trying to say here , so d*** remarkable.

Even though i'm an ill body.

Even though I don't have\nI suppose, I guess what normal people would say is something valuable to offer.\nI've realized something tremendously important , maybe even frighteningly important.

And I say this now with complete humbleness and humility.

F*** that feeling of worthless.

I'\nM actually an extraordinarily awesome person.

I'm fun, I'm funny, I'm loving, I'm caring. I'm kind, I'm compassionate, I'm empathetic, I'm intelligent, I'm brave, I'm courageous.\n And for the life of me, I cannot understand why even  With all the wonderful things I have to offer, I cannot\nComprehend , why my own family doesn't want to spend time with me.

Obviously.\nThis has a tremendous amount to do with the childhood trauma as my parents and caregivers.\nAre not normal?They're not loving.They're not kind.They're not compassionate and it's no freaking wonder I spent forty years hating myself and hating everyone in the world

This\nIsn't something I taught myself?This is something they taught me.

Now , as a professionally trained mental health condition , I recognize that not loving your own children or family is immensely , bizarre and damaging and bad

Those are the characteristics of people that are either too dumb to comprehend what really matters or sell , to have the emotional intelligence to understand what it means to be loving , and to give yourself away , to spend quality time with those you claim to love.

I know now that it is weird and antisocial to not love your own children and not want to spend time with them.

Until my ultimate meager, humble message is purpose and meaning is completely found within yourself.And if those who should love , you , don't screw , forget about them.

Ethel, who claimed to love you don't make you a priority in their lives.Then that is their loss.

And bye , golly , if god is real , there surely must be a place in hell for people like that.

One rather terrifying consequence of having high intellectual curiosity.\n And an immense capacity for conscientiousness, it allows you to create frameworks of the world within your mind in order to anticipate what's coming to anticipate danger.  Are you too anticipate what the future holds?And unfortunately , that high contentiousness directly weeds to intense anxiety , if not managed or treated or educated , right.

The anxiety ultimately stems from\n The high capacity for conscientiousness to understand all of the threats and dangers in the world, and to know how helpless you are to do anything about most of them.\n And so a mind  I was never loved cared for correctly as a child learns to be afraid of everything, and that my friends is the essence of post-traumatic stress disorder and an entire multitude of anxiety and depression and self-harming behaviors like  Disassociating from reality by the means of drugs and alcohol or endless social media consumption.

But I leave you with an intense optimistic, tremendous help.\n For the future, if you don't feel loved or you feel depressed or you feel anxious. Stop waiting for someone to come save you, only you can do it.  And so don't accept being abused by anybody.

There are a lot of people in the world that needs hope and religion is one place to find it unfortunately.\n Even though I'm not hubris enough to say I know for sure that God is or isn't real.  I have the intellectual honesty to say I don't know\n Thus enters being agnostic and of course, the frightening reality of nihilism sinks in as I imagine all of the  Horrible ways.Not only my own life could end , but the entire world could end

Artificial intelligence could kill us all global warming, a nuclear war, unstoppable antibiotic resistant super plague, asteroid or solar flare , or supernova comes out of nowhere. Space aliens or sea monsters, Who the hell knows.

Never forget the wisdom of the Dunning Kruger effect. The more you know, the more you realize, you don't know my God, if I could change my intense intellectual capacity and conscientiousness for a life of blissful ignorance and hedonism.  Dare I say I can sitter trading everything I have for that.

Of course , that's an exercise futility , because obviously that's not an option.

So i've learned to take some comfort in the unknowing and the impending chaos.

No one knows how much longer they had to live, but I say live d*****For yourself, if not your own mental well-being and self-esteem, try to be happy grateful.I live one day at a time