Favorite Quotes

A few of my favorite quotes

I am a compulsive quote collector. Find below a few of my favorites. If you find a misattribution, let me know, but send me documentation as well. Thanks! This page last updated August 2010.

If you have told a child a thousand times and he still does not understand, then it is not the child who is the slow learner. Lianne M. Hanson

A fierce unrest seethes at the core, of all existing things:

it was the eager wish to soar, that gave the gods their wings. Don Marquis

My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers. Woody Allen.

Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television. David Letterman

Love many, trust a few, and always paddle your own canoe. Bumper Sticker

Children need to hang around a teacher who is asking bigger questions of herself than she is asking of them. Donald Graves

We’re fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese proverb

And did you get what

you wanted from this life, even so?

I did.

And what did you want?

To call myself beloved, to feel myself

beloved on the earth. —Raymond Carver

If you want an interesting party sometime, combine cocktails and a fresh box of crayons for everyone. ~Robert Fulghum

I’d rather be partly great than entirely useless. ~ Neil Shusterman

There’ll be two dates on your tombstone

And all your friends will read ‘em

But all that’s gonna matter

is that little dash between ‘em. ~Kevin Welch

Ideas move fast when their time comes. ~ Carolyn Heilbrun


And remember, this fix is only temporary, unless it works, then it’s permanent. - Red Green


We are at “the end of an era.” It is as if we are falling off a cliff, wondering if the parachute will open.Budget times are tight, school library programs are “on the chopping block,” school librarians are nervous for their future.It is a beautiful thing. Fantastic, even—because there is no choice for school librarians but to adapt to the challenge.This is not a technical problem. It is not possible to dig deep into memory banks and retrieve an answer. This is an adaptive problem — one that requires true innovation. - Allison Zmuda

“For beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror

which we are barely able to endure, and it amazes us so,

because it serenely disdains to destroy us.

Every angel is terrible.” Rainer Maria Rilke

Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened. -Dr. Seuss

Same old slippers, Same old rice, Same old glimpse of paradise. ~ William James Lampton

Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories. - Arthur C Clark

Little drops of water,

Little grains of sand,

Make the mighty ocean

And the pleasant land.

Little deeds of kindness,

Little words of love,

Make our earth an Eden,

Like the heaven above. “Little Things” Julia A.F. Carney

Don’t worry if your job is small and your rewards are few. Just remember that the mighty oak was once a nut like you. Bullwinkle J. Moose

Facts have a well known liberal bias. Stephen Colbert

The primary purpose of a liberal education is to make one’s mind a pleasant place in which to spend one’s leisure. Sydney J. Harris

You teach kids how to succeed when they successfully foil the educational system. Arlo Guthrie

Know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change, but pretty soon…everything’s different. – Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes

Ring the bells that still can ring.

Forget your perfect offering.

There’s a crack in everything—

That’s how the light gets in. Leonard Cohen

The ultimate goal of the educational system is to shift to the individual the burden of pursuing his education. ~ John Gardner

The secret to happiness is having low expectations.—Warren Buffett

There are no rules here. We’re trying to accomplish something. Thomas Edison

A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle. - Proverb

Foolish writers and readers are created for each other. Horace Walpole

The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would suffice to solve most of the world’s problems. Gandhi

Each time a person stands for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he or she sends forth a tiny ripple of hope. And crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. Few are willing to embrace the disapproval of their fellows, the censure of their colleagues, the wrath of their society. Moral courage is a rarer commodity than bravery in battle or great intelligence. Yet it is the one essential vital quality for those who seek to change a world that yields most painfully to change. - Robert F. Kennedy

If we teach as we taught yesterday, we rob our children of tomorrow. - John Dewey


Who dares to teach must never cease to learn. –John Cotton Dana

“out beyond ideas of right doing and wrong doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” Rumi

If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people together to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea. -Antoine de Saint-Exupery

When everyone’s out to get you, paranoia’s just good thinking. - Dr. Johnny Fever

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. - Plato

“If you don’t like change, you’re going to like irrelevance even less.” - General Eric Shinseki, Chief of Staff, U.S. Army

“Thou shalt not” might reach the head, but it takes “Once upon a time” to reach the heart. Philip Pullman

The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you. - Despair, Inc.

If the unheard-of actions of today’s youth are allowed to continue, then we are doomed. Sumerian tablet

“Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.” Mahatma Gandhi


“If you disaggregate, things fall apart.” - Tony Snow

Dance like it hurts,/ Love like you need money,/ Work when people are watching. - Scott (Dilbert) Adams

If you lose your job, your marriage and your mind in all the same week, try to lose your mind first, because then the other stuff won’t matter that much.” Jack Handy

Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels there really is another way, if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it. - AA Milne

From too much love of living,

From hope and fear set free,

We thank with brief thanksgiving

Whatever gods may be

That no life lives for ever;

That dead men rise up never;

That even the weariest river

Winds somewhere safe to sea.

Algernon Charles Swinburne (1837–1909)

When you go for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.” Jack Handy

If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure. Dan Quayle

I feel so bad since you’ve gone. It’s almost like having you here. Anon

I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What the hell good would that do? Ronnie Shakes

In a fight between you and the world, bet on the world. Kafka


It’s not an optical illusion. It just looks like one. Steven Wright


If it’s true we’re here to help others, what exactly are the others here for? George Carlin


Originality usually only amounts to plagiarizing something unfamiliar. Katherine Gerould


The world bats last. Anon.


…technology is an accelerator of greatness already in place, never the principal cause of greatness or decline. Newsweek, April 29, 2002.


Somebody has to do something, and it’s just incredibly pathetic that is has to be us. Jerry Garcia


Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. Charles M. Schulz


If I’m not having fun in class, no one is having fun. - Albert Cullum

What we call the beginning is often the end

And to make an end is to make a beginning.

The end is where we start from. And every phrase

And sentence that is right (where every word is at home,

Taking its place to support the others…)

Every phrase and every sentence is an end and a beginning,

Every poem an epitaph. And any action

Is a step to the block, to the fire, down the sea’s throat

Or to an illegible stone: and that is where we start.

With the drawing of this Love and the voice of this Calling

We shall not cease from exploration

And the end of all our exploring

Will be to arrive where we started

And know the place for the first time.

- T.S. Eliot, “The Four Quartets”


If one person tells you that you have ass’s ears, take no notice; should two tell you so, procure a saddle for yourself. Spanish proverb

Nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore, we must be saved by hope. Nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history; therefore, we must be saved by faith. Nothing we do, however virtuous, could be accomplished alone; therefore, we must be saved by love. No virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as it is from our own standpoint; therefore, we must be saved by the final form of love, which is forgiveness. Reinhold Niebuhr


If you want your children to be brilliant, read them fairly tales. If you want them to be geniuses, read them more fairy tales. Albert Einstein


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. — George Carlin


Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Napoleon Bonaparte


Whenever he thought about it, he felt terrible. And so, he made a fateful decision. He decided not to think about it. Life 101


It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer . Albert Einstein


We must be the change we wish to see in the world. Gandhi


The fates guide those who go willingly; those who do not, they drag. Seneca


The final result is that technology aids our thoughts and civilized lives, but it also provides a mind-set that artificially elevates some aspects of life and ignores others, not based upon their real importance but rather by the arbitrary condition of whether they can be measured scientifically and objectively by today’s tools. Consequently, science and technology tend to deal solely with the products of their measurements, they divorce themselves from the real world. The danger is that things that cannot be measured play no role in scientific work and are judged to be of little importance. Science and technology do what they can do and ignore the rest. They are superb at what they do, but what is left out can be of equal or greater importance. Donald A. Norman


Dew knot trussed yore spell chequer two fined awl yore mistakes. Brendan Hill


You are educated when you have the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or self-confidence. Robert Frost


Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known. Keillor.


There’s no such thing as knowledge management; there are only knowledgeable people. Information only becomes knowledge in the hands of someone who knows what to do with it. - Peter Drucker


I’d like to get to a state where people think that if you’ve Googled something, you’ve researched it, and otherwise haven’t, and that’s it. Sergy Brin


Stephen Hawking’s A Brief History of Time tells the story of a cosmologist whose speech is interrupted by a little old lady who informs him that the universe rests on the back of a turtle. Ah, yes, madame, the scientist replies, but what does the turtle rest on? The old lady shoots back: You can’t trick me, young man. It’s nothing but turtles, turtles, turtles, all the way down. George Will


With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine.


Men have become the tools of their tools. -Henry David Thoreau


This is my rule of married life: it’s better to be happy than to be right. -Click & Clack


Lazlo’s Chinese Relativity Axiom: No matter how great your triumphs or how tragic your defeats, approximately one billion Chinese couldn’t care less.


I think, therefore I am paid.


HELP WANTED: Telepath - You know where to apply.


The best defense against logic is ignorance.


The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn. -Alvin Toffler


I had been my whole life a bell, and never knew until at that moment I was lifted and stuck… Anne Dillard


The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance. -Robert R. Coveyou


Just where are we going and why are we in this handbasket? -Penny Pennington


Nothing important can be taught, only learned. Dale Dauten


Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win. Jonathan Kozol


aibohphobia n. The fear of palindromes.


Give me ambiguity or give me something else.


Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. Picasso


How many a man has dated a new era in his life from the reading of a book. Thoreau


My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That’s almost $7.00 in dog money. Joe Weinstein


Leadership is not magnetic personality— that can just as well be a glib tongue. It is not ‘making friends and influencing people’— that is flattery. Leadership is lifting a person’s vision to higher sights, the raising of a person’s performance to a higher standard, the building of a personality beyond its normal limitations. öPeter Drucker


There is no such thing as a minor lapse of integrity. -Tom Peters


I’ve learned that the person with big dreams is more powerful than the one with all the facts. -Anonymous, age 51 (quoted in Live & Learn & Pass It On


Teaching a child not to step on a caterpillar is as valuable to the child as it is to the caterpillar. -Bradley Miller


May those that love us, love us; and those that don’t love us, May God turn their hearts; and if He doesn’t turn their hearts, may He turn their ankles so we’ll know them by their limping. - Old Irish Toast


Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws. -Plato


Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.


The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; and the realist adjusts the sails. -William Arthur Ward


If we’re not supposed to eat animals, how come they’re made out of meat? Bob Pease


The next time you feel the urge to procrastinate… just put it off. Lions Club International


Resentment is just a way of letting someone else use your mind rent-free. Roger Ebert


Everything must degenerate into work if anything is to happen. Peter Drucker


Ex abusu non arguitur in usum. (The abuse of a thing is no argument against its use.)


..people (in Minnesota) avoid stupidity when possible, not wanting to be a $10 haircut on a 50 cent head. - Garrison Keillor


For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press 3. Alice Kahn


A human mind, once stretched to a new idea, never returns to its former dimension. Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.


The other day, I dropped a piece of bread and it fell butter side up. I was convinced that I’d buttered the wrong side of the bread.


Education is when you read the fine print. Experience is what you get if you don’t. Pete Seeger


You can’t steer a parked car.


I wanted a perfect ending … Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity. Gilda Radner


A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep. Saul Bellow


I’m tired of love, I’m still more tired of rhyme, but money gives me pleasure all the time. Hilaire Belloc


Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in their readiness to doubt. H.L. Mencken



The great pleasure of life is doing what people say you cannot do. Walter Bagehot


The right to be left alone is the most comprehensive of rights and the most valued in civilized man. Louis D. Brandeis



The Saturday night special is nature’s way of holding down the population of trash in this country - your adulterous wives, drunken husbands, card cheats and obnoxious citizens in bars. It is a form of natural selection that tends toward the perfection of the breed. Molly Ivins


Teachers open the door. You enter by yourself. Chinese Proverb


I dwell in Possibility,

A fairer house than Prose. Emily Dickinson



The Buddha, the Godhead, resides quite as comfortably in the circuits of a digital computer or the gears of a cycle transmission as he does at the top of a mountain or in the petals of a flower. To think otherwise is to demean the Buddha - which is to demean oneself. Robert Pirsig



The Noah Principal: No more prizes for predicting rain. Prizes only for building arks. Louis Gerstner



The Gods have two ways of dealing harshly with us ö the first is to deny us our dreams, and the second is to grant them. Oscar Wilde



We may destroy all the men in America and we shall still have all we can do to defeat the women. British officer during the American Revolutionary War



Cheer Up! The Worst Is Yet To Come! Phillip C. Johnson



The race will go to the curious, the slightly mad, those with an unsated passion for learning and daredeviltry. Tom Peters



186,000 miles per second. It’s not just a good idea - it’s the law.



Anything that does not kill me, makes me stronger. Nietzche



For when the One Great Scorer comes

To write against your name,

He marks - not what you won or lost -

But how you played the game. Grantland Rice



LOST: Black and white cat. Blind in left eye. Lame. Recently castrated. Answers to the name of Lucky. Roland Dille



As things so very often are

intelligence won’t get you far.

So be glad you’ve got more sense

than you’ve got intelligence. Piet Hein


Experts have

their expert fun

ex cathedra

telling one

just how nothing

can be done. Piet Hein



As yourself whether you are happy, and you will cease to be so. John Stuart Mill



Shake and shake

The catsup bottle,

None will come,

And then a lot’ll. Richard Armour



Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. Samuel Goldwyn



Every good thought you think is contributing its share to the ultimate result of your life. Grenville Kleiser



In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language. Mark Twain



Do you realize if it weren’t for Edison we’d be watching TV by candlelight? Al Boliska



Hide not your talents,

they for use were made.

What’s a Sun-dial

in the Shade? Benjamin Franklin


Consolation

Losing one glove

is certainly painful,

but nothing

compared to the pain

of losing one,

throwing the other away,

and finding the first one again.


It is possible to own too much. A man with one watch knows what time it is; a man with two watches is never quite sure. Lee Segall


Those who do not study the past are doomed to repeat its errors. Those who do —- will find other ways to err.


The important thing is not to stop questioning. Albert Einstein


The other day I got out my can-opener and was opening a can of worms when I thought, “What am I doing?! Jack Handey


Captain Penny’s Law: You can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all of the time, but you can’t fool MOM!,


Be humble for the worst thing in the world is of the same stuff as you; be confident for the stars are of the same stuff as you. Nicholai Velimrovie


Refuse to join the cautious crowd that plays not to lose; play to win. David J. Mahoney


Imagination is more important than knowledge. A. Einstein


You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job. Laurence J. Peter


I respect faith but doubt is what gets you an education. Wilson Mizner


If the path be beautiful, let us not ask where it leads. Anatole France


An ass is beautiful to an ass, and a pig is beautiful to a pig. John Ray


Someday I would like to stand on the moon, look down through a quarter million miles of space and say, There certainly is a beautiful earth out tonight. William H. Rankin



All the fun’s in how you say a thing. Robert Frost



The larger the island of knowledge, the longer the shoreline of wonder. Ralph W. Sockman


The Chinese use two brush strokes to write the word crisis. One brush stroke stands for danger, the other for opportunity. In a crisis, be aware of the danger - but recognize the opportunity. Richard M. Nixon



Is it progress if a cannibal uses a knife and fork? Stanislaw J. Lec



Every snowflake in an avalanche pleads not guilty. Stanislaw J. Lec



There is no accounting for taste, as the woman said when told her son was wanted by the police. Franklin P. Adams



After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. Aldous Huxley



The best way I know of winning an argument is to start by being in the right. Quentin Hogg, M.P.



Tact: the ability to tell a man he’s open minded when he has a hole in his head. F.G. Kernan



What is not good for the hive is not good for the bee. Marcus Aurelius



There is never time to do it right, but always time to do it over.



Patton’s Law: A good plan to today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.


Plan, transitive verb: to bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result. Ambrose Bierce



In times of change, learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists. Eric Hoffer



We have excellent gifted programs in every school. The problem is that they are for athletes. Marvin Myers



All technology should be assumed guilty until proven innocent. David Brower


… look the spangles

that sleep all the year in a dark box

dreaming of being taken out and allowed to shine,

the balls the chains red and gold the fluffy threads

put up your little arms

and i’ll give them all to you to hold

every finger shall have its ring

and there won’t be a single place dark or unhappy …

e.e. cummings



Never teach a pig to sing. It will frustrate you and annoy the pig. Old Iowa saying,



As you get older, the pickings get slimmer, but the people don’t. Carrie Fisher



The only sure defense in the post-modern world is a bad attitude. Zippy the Pinhead



Whoso would be a man, must be a nonconformist. He who would gather immortal palms must not be hindered by the name of goodness, but must explore if it be goodness. Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind. Ralph Waldo Emerson


You can be sincere and still be stupid. Charles F. Kettering

The goal is to teach in such a way as to produce the most learning from the least teaching. – Seymour Papert

Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry. George Ade


Those of you who think you know everything are annoying to those of us who do.


Backward, turn backward, O time, in your flight, And tell me just one thing I studied last night. Hobart Brown


Solitude: a good place to visit, but a poor place to stay. Josh Billings


Easy to use is easy to say. Jeff Garbers

Statistics are no substitute for judgment. – Henry Clay

The person who knows how will always have a job. But the person who knows why will be his boss. – Carl C. Wood

You don’t stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing. — Anonymous

There is always an easy solution to every problem - neat, plausible, and wrong. H.L. Mencken


Truth is with the victor - who, as you know, controls the historians. Rolf Hochhuth



I’ve met a few people in my time who were enthusiastic about hard work. And it was just my luck that all of them happened to be men I was working for at the time. Bill Gold



Most men, when they think they are thinking, are merely rearranging their predjudices. Knute Rockne



A problem well stated is a problem half solved. Charles F. Kettering



I believe that leadership starts at the bottom, not from the top. Every movement in our history starts from the bottom up. Abolitionism, the Civil War, the civil rights movement, women’s rights, environment, consumerism, antiwar, you name it. They aren’t lead by the one great voice. If we look for the miracle person to solve this, we’re never gonna do it. Hayes Johnson

Tim was so learned, that he could name a horse in nine languages. So ignorant, that he bought a cow to ride on.” — Benjamin Franklin


You do what you do out of your private love of the thing itself. Anne Dillard



Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.


O wud some power the giftie gie us, To see oursel’s as others see us. Robert Burns




Don’t discuss yourself, for you are bound to lose; if you belittle yourself, you are believed; if you praise yourself you are disbelieved. Michel de Montaigne



He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. Thomas Fuller



Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known. Carl Sagan



Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat. Harry Emerson Fosdick



The word good has many meanings. For example, if a man were to shoot his grandmother at the range of five hundred yards, I should call him a good shot, but not necessarily a good man. G.K. Chesterton


WETHERN’S LAW OF SUSPENDED JUDGMENT: Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.


The Rebel

When I

die

I’m sure

I will have a

Big Funeral

Curiosity

seekers

coming to see

if I

am really

Dead

Or just

trying to make

Trouble - Mari Evans



I never resist temptation because I have found that the things that are bad for me do not tempt me. G.B. Shaw



Those who do not know their opponent’s arguments do not completely understand their own.



To use too much Time in Studies is Sloth. Francis Bacon



Discussion is an exchange of knowledge; argument is an exchange of ignorance. Robert Quillan



Potter’s Law: The amount of flack received on any subject is inversely proportional to the subject’s true value.


Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside them was superior to circumstances. Bruce Barton



Shrimpton’s Law of Teenage Opportunity: When opportunity knocks, you’ve got headphones on.



We would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. Norman Vincent Peale



I was so long writing my review that I never got around to reading the book. Groucho Marx



But who is to guard the guards themselves? Juvenal



Mrs. Weiler’s Law: Anything is edible if it is chopped finely enough.


A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. Oscar Wilde



He is either dead or teaching school. Zenobius


Life is not a spectacle or a feast: it is a predicament. George Santayana


For every evil under the sun,

There is a remedy or there is none.

If there be one, try and find it.

If there be none, never mind it. - Old English rhyme


I often have long conversations all by myself, and am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word I am saying. Oscar Wilde



There are three great questions which in life we have to ask over and over again to answer:

Is it right or wrong?

Is it true or false?

Is it beautiful or ugly?

Our education ought to help us to answer these questions. John Lubbock



Subdue your appetites, my dear, and you’ve conquered human nature. Charles Dickens



The Carpenter is Not the Best Who Makes More Chips than all the Rest. Arthur Guiterman



What is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Matthew



Never eat anything in one sitting that you can’t lift. Miss Piggy



In the future no one wins a war. It is true, there are degrees of loss, but no one wins. Brock Chishom



The day when nobody comes back from a war, it will be because the war has at last been properly organized. Boris Vian



A cynic is the man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. H.L. Menken




Hatred is like fire; it makes even light rubbish deadly. George Eliot



Be yourself is the worst advice you can give to some people. Tom Masson


Shake was a dramatist of note; He lived by writing things to quote. H.C. Brunner


To make headway, improve your head. B.C. Forbes



The desire for safety stands against every great and noble enterprise. Tacitus



A conclusion is the place where you got tired thinking. Martin H. Fischer


The IQ is often less important than the I Will. E Escar


Jones’ Law: The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.


It is not enough to be busy the question is: what are we busy about? Henry David Thoreau


On statistics: Then there was the man who drowned crossing a stream with an average depth of only six inches. W.I.E. Gates



Colors are the deeds and suffering of light. Goethe



If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others. Tryon Edwards



Whoever gossips to you will gossip about you. Spanish proverb


My purpose in writing is to entertain myself first and other people secondly. John D. McDonald



Sometimes I sit and think.

And sometimes I just sit.



If people really like to work, we’d still be plowing the land with sticks and transporting goods on out backs. William Feather


There is no place so benighted and godforsaken that some moron won’t go there on vacation. People could be living in an open sewer and swallowing dirt to stop the hunger, and there’d be a couple from Larchmont wearing comfortable shoes there to take pictures of them. Thomas Perry


Every saint has a past and every sinner a future. Oscar Wilde


If at first you don’t succeed you’re running about average. MH Alderson


If your parents didn’t have any children, there’s a good chance that you won’t have any. Clarence Day



It is an old maxim of mine that when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle


How can you come to know yourself? Never by thinking; always by doing. Try to do your duty, and you’ll know right away what you amount to. And what is your duty? Whatever the day calls for. Goethe



Have more than thou showest, Speak less than thou knowest. Shakespeare



Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest. Mark Twain



Let me have my own way exactly in everything, and a sunnier and pleasanter creature does not exist. Thomas Carlyle


We’re all born brave, trusting and greedy, and most of us remain greedy. Mignon McLaughlin


People are divided into two groups - the righteous and the unrighteous - and the righteous do the dividing.



It is better to have loafed and lost than to have never loafed at all. James Thurber


If you scoff at language study … how, save in terms of language, will you scoff? Mario Pei


Diplomacy is the art of saying Nice doggie till you can find a rock. Will Catlin


Our plans miscarry because they have no aim. When a man does not know what harbor he is making for, no wind is the right wind. Seneca


Gross ignorance: 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance. Bennett Cerf


Better a pebble given out of love than a diamond out of duty.


A reformer is a guy who rides through a sewer on a glass bottom boat. Jimmy Walker


There is only one way to have happiness on this terrestrial ball,

And that is to have a clear conscience, or none at all. - Ogden Nash


Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. - Hanlon


If I have been able to see farther than others, it was because I have stood on the shoulders of giants. Sir Isaac Newton


If ambition doesn’t hurt you, you haven’t got it. Kathleen Norris


‘Taint what a man don’t know that hurts him; it’s what he knows that just ain’t so. Kin Hubbard



Newton’s Little Known 7th Law: A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.


My father worked for the same firm for 12 years. They fired him. They replaced him with a tiny gadget this big. It does everything my father does only better. The depressing thing is my mother ran out and bought one. Woody Allen


I never, ever say I can’t about anything. I might say I don’t have the authority to make that decision or Building A is too heavy for me to lift or I will need training before I pilot that space shuttle. Mike Huber


The MOST PLEASANT and useful persons are those who leave some of the problems of the universe for God to worry about. Don Marquis


Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.


We should all be obliged to appear before a board every five years and justify our existence…on pain of liquidation. G.B. Shaw


People do not quit playing because they grow old. They grow old because they quit playing. Oliver Wendell Holmes


I don’t have any solution but I certainly admire the problem. Ashleigh Brilliant


Imagine a school with children that can read or write, but with teachers who cannot, and you have a metaphor of the Information Age in which we live. Peter Cochrane


Mason to Dixon: ‘You gotta draw the line someplace.


The best way to predict the future is to invent it. Alan Kay


And what I discovered in my life is that, if you have a dream, it almost always comes true, but you have to stick to it. You have to believe very deeply in it, and the forces of the universe are helping you. Robert Muller


Go as far as you can see; when you get there you’ll be able to see farther. Thomas Carlyle


A smooth sea never made a skillful sailor.


Kids can do it! Parent’s can do it! Heck, even a typing monkey could do it! With those odds, we’re sure you’ll have absolutely no problems! Sean Carton


I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. Fry and Laurie


Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts. Aristotle


It it’s a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny. Stephen Wright


The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat. Lily Tomlin


I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side. Steven Wright


Knock-Please don’t ring doorbell. - Ivan Pavlov,


Try to relax and enjoy the crisis. Ashleigh Brilliant


Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. Ambrose Redmoon


First Law of Political Campaigns: If there are twelve clowns in a ring, you can jump in the middle and start reciting Shakespeare, but to the audience, you’ll just be the thirteenth clown. Adam Walinsky


Wouldn’t it be nice if the wattage of a car stereo could not exceed the IQ of the driver


I plan to be more assertive - that is, if it’s OK with the group. Bill Chase


Finagle’s Laws of Information:

1. The information you have is not what you want.

2. The information you want is not what you need.

3. The information you need is not what you can obtain.

4. The information you can obtain costs more than you want to pay!



Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing. Albert Schweitzer


Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. Clive James


Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead


Only dead fish go with the flow.


It’s not just the ups and downs that make life difficult; it’s the jerks.


Most of us miss out on life’s big prizes. The Pulitzer. The Nobel. Oscars. Tonys. Emmys. But we’re all eligible for life’s small pleasures. A pat on the back. A kiss behind the ear. A four-pound bass. A full moon. An empty parking space. A crackling fire. A great meal. A glorious sunset. Hot soup. Cold beer. Don’t fret about copping life’s grand awards. Enjoy its tiny delights. There are plenty for all of us. Ken Dye


Arithmetic is being able to count up to twenty without taking off your shoes. Mickey Mouse


Never cut what you can untie. Joseph Joubert


Leadership is getting someone to do what they don’t want to do, to achieve what they want to achieve. Tom Landry


E = MC**2 -Albert Einstein

Very good Albert, but next time show your work! C+,


It has come to our attention that there is a remote tribe that worships the number zero. Is nothing sacred?,


Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. Mark Twain



The brook would lose its song if you removed the rocks.


Personally I’m always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught. Winston Churchill


Have patience with all things, but first of all with yourself. St. Francis de Sales


The cost of living is high, but it’s worth it. Doug Larson


Itâs not where the puck is that counts. Itâs where the puck will be. Wayne Gretzky


What did the snail say when he rode on the turtle’s back? WHEEEEEEEEEE


Month-End Report: All targets met; All systems working; All customers satisfied; All staff eager and enthusiastic; All pigs fed and ready to fly. V. Arwginski


There are two thoughts that will insure success in all you do:

1. Don’t tell everything you know.


When your mind goes blank, don’t forget to turn off the sound.


How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. Annie Dillard


Youth and skill are no match for experience and treachery.


We live by encouragement and die without it - slowly, sadly, angrily. Celeste Holm


Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend: and inside a dog, it’s too dark to read. Groucho Marx


Life is about making hard judgments and inferences. It’s not about repeating what a teacher told you. Richard Elmore


Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work. Robert Orben


Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber. Plato


In a fight between you and the world, bet on the world. Franz Kafka


Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long. Ogden Nash


Faced with the choice between changing one’s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof. John Kenneth Galbraith


Things will get better - despite our efforts to improve them. Will Rogers


The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple. Oscar Wilde


I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job. Samuel Goldwyn


I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What the hell good would that do? Ronnie Shakes


Q: What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?

A: A stick.


TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: The Occupational Safety & Health Administration (OSHA) has determined that

the maximum safe load on my butt is 2 persons at a time - unless I install handrails or safety straps. As you have arrived 6th in line to ride my ass today, please take a number and wait your turn.


The sweat of hard work is not to be displayed. It is much more graceful to appear favored by the gods. Maxine Hong Kingston


Which is worse - ignorance or apathy? Who knows? Who cares?


Reputation continues to be made by many acts and lost by one.


The issue of the use of technology is 5 percent bits and bytes (a spiffy e-mail system that spans continents), 95 percent psychology and sociology (an organization that dotes on sharing information rather than hoarding it). Tom Peters


A person’s creative ability decreases in direct proportion to the degree to which he takes himself seriously. Eric Hoffer


You will have inservice training on the use of technology every Tuesday and Thursday after school for the rest of your life. Royal Van Horn


No student has the right to interfere with the learning of another student or the purpose of an activity. (The one rule that governs the Glen Urquhart School in Mass.)


We wish to be self-sustained. We do not quite forgive a giver. The hand that feeds us is in some danger of being bitten. R.W. Emerson


If you really do place small value on yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price. Anon


The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it. Franklin P. Jones


An Edible: Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm. A. Bierce


There are two things on earth that are universal: hydrogen and stupidity. Frank Zappa


Love your enemy - it will drive him nuts. Eleanor Doan


How can they say my life isn’t a success? Have I not for more than sixty years got enough to eat and escaped being eaten? Logan Pearsall Smith


When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. Mark Twain


Hate the sin and love the sinner. Mohandas Gandhi


If you can’t win, make the fellow ahead of you break the record. Anonymous


Anyone who has not begun to think places some portion of the world in jeopardy. John Dewey


He who hates vices hates mankind. Thrasea


Many people’s tombstones should read, Died at 30. Buried at 60. Nicholas Murray Butler


An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes it will also make a better soup. H.L. Menken


Everyone is somebody else’s weirdo. Dykstra


Do not remove a fly from your friend’s forehead with a hatchet. Chinese proverb.


Happiness? That’s nothing more than good health and a poor memory. Albert Schweitzer


My father taught me to work, but not to love it. I never did like work, and I don’t deny it. I’d rather read, tell stories, crack jokes, talk, laugh - anything but work. Abraham Lincoln


The First Law of Money Dynamics: A surprise monetary windfall will be accompanied by an unexpected expense of the same amount.


The truth can be made up if you know how. Jane Wagner


A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air.

A psychotic is the man who lives in it.

A psychiatrist is the man who collects the rent. Jerome Lawrence


Talk not of wasted affection! Affection never was wasted. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


If all the year were playing holidays To sport would be as tedious as work. Shakespeare


Work is the refuge of people who have nothing better to do. Oscar Wilde


Never do anything standing that you can do sitting, or anything sitting that you can do lying down. Chinese proverb


This is the first age that’s paid much attention to the future, which is a little ironic since we may not have one. Arthur C. Clarke


Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of science. Ralph Waldo Emerson


Think like a man of action, and act like a man of thought. K. Bergson


They talk most who have the least to say. Matthew Prior


People who take time to be alone usually have depth, originality, and quiet reserve. John Miller


If you want to get rich by writing, write the sort of thing that’s read by people who move their lips when they’re reading to themselves. Don Marquis


My riches consist not in the extent of my possessions but in the fewness of my wants. J. Brotherton


I don’t know what to think until I see what I’ve said. E.M. Forster


To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men — that is genius. R.W. Emerson


It’s fine to believe in ourselves, but we mustn’t be too easily convinced. B. Hillis


Selfishness is that detestable vice no one will forgive in others and no one is without in himself. H. Beecher


Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers. Voltaire


There is a difference between beauty and charm. A beautiful woman is one I notice. A charming woman is one who notices me. John Erskin


It doesn’t matter if you are rich or poor, as long as you’ve got money. Joe E. Lewis


If happiness truly consisted in physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow. William Lyon Phelps


Problems worthy of attack, prove their worth by hitting back. Piet Hein


On intellect: If your head is wax, don’t walk in the sun. Benjamin Franklin


For every 10 there are 10 1s. Munder


From the errors of others a wise man corrects his own. Publilius Syrus


Virtue has needs of limits. Baron de Montesquieu


A fanatic is one who sticks to his guns whether they’re loaded or not. Franklin P. Jones


I worry no matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up. Jane Wagner


I’d rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck. Emma Goldman


I love being a writer. What I can’t stand is the paperwork. Peter De Vries


No call alligator long mouth until you pass him. Jamaican proverb


A bore is a person who talks when you want him to listen. Ambrose Bierce


A man said to the universe, Sir, I exist. However, replied the universe, that fact has not created in me a sense of obligation. Stephen Crane


All snakes who wish to remain in Ireland will please raise their right hands. Saint Patrick


We must respect the other fellow’s religion, but only in the same sense and to the same extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. H.L. Menken


You grow up the day you have the first real laugh - at yourself. Ethel Barrymore


All things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening. Alexander Woollcottt


True success is overcoming the fear of being unsuccessul. Paul Sweney


The man who has ceased to learn ought not be allowed to wander loose in these dangerous days. M.M. Cody


If it ain’t broke, you probably still can fix it. Tim Allen


The whole point of getting things done is knowing what to leave undone. Stella, Lady Reading


You don’t want to be in bed with somebody who says, I’ll race you to sleep. Richard Lewis


We can’t all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by. Will Rogers


I HATE PEOPLE WHO ARE INTOLERANT. Laurence J. Peter


A man never so clearly describes his own character as when he describes another’s. J.P. Richter


As soon as you make something idot-proof, along comes another idiot. Graves Law,


Anyone who popular is bound to be disliked. Yogi Berra


It is not best that we should all think alike; it is difference of opinion which makes horse races. Mark Twain


Happiness, n. An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. Ambrose Bierce


Edelstein’s Advice: Don’t worry over what other people are thinking about you. They’re too busy worrying over what you are thinking about them.


Procrastination - the art of keeping up with yesterday. Don Marquis


Katz’s Law: People and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.


Some of the greatest love affairs I’ve known have involved one actor - unassisted. Wilson Mazer


Foreign Aid - taxing the poor people in rich countries for the benefit of rich people in poor countries. Bernard Rosenburg


An incompetent teacher is even worse than an incompetent surgeon because a surgeon can only cut up one person at a time. Ernet Boyer


A converted cannibal is one who on Fridays eats only fishermen. Emily Lotney


I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients. Oscar Levant


Natalie’s Law of Algebra You never catch on until after the test.


My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music. Vladimir Nabokov


Finagles 2nd Law: Always keep a record of data - it indicates you’ve been working.


Never get angry. Never make a threat. Reason with people. Don Corleone, The Godfather


If no thought your mind does visit,

make your speech not too explicit. - Piet Hein


When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself. Louis Nizer


Most educators would continue to lecture on navigation while the ship is going down. James H. Boren


Welcome to the New Automated Teacher Mental Health Line

If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.

If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2.

If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If your are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.

If your schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you what number to press.

If you are depressed it doesnât matter which number you press. No one will answer.


First Rule of Staff Development: Work with the living.


Millihelen. n. amount of beauty required to launch one ship.


A hypocrite is someone who complain about the sex and violence on his VCR.


SIX PHASES OF A PROJECT

1. Enthusiasm

2. Disillusionment

3. Panic

4. Search for the Guilty

5. Punishment of the Innocent

6. Praise & Honors for the Nonparticipants


Nothing in our culture, not even home computers, is more overrated than the epidermal felicity of two featherless bipeds in desperate congress. Quentin Crisp


It is easier to move a cemetery than to change a curriculum. Woodrow Wilson


The only completely consistent people are the dead. Aldous Huxley


If you want to change the world, you change the world of a child. Pat Schroeder


We shape our buildings and afterwards our buildings shape us. Winston Churchill


Remember:

The value of time.

The success of perseverance.

The pleasure of working.

The dignity of simplicity.

The worth of character.

The power of kindness.

The influence of example.

The obligation of duty.

The wisdom of economy.

The virtue of patience.

The improvement of talent.

The joy of originating. - Marshall Field


Always take a job that is too big for you. Harry Emerson Fosdick


I find television very educating. Everytime someone turns on the set I go into the other room and read a book. Groucho Marx


one nacho underwear, with licorice and jug wine for owls


When I was a kid I said to my father one afternoon, Daddy, will you take me to the zoo? He answered, If the zoo wants you let them come and get you. Jerry Lewis


Always behave like a duck - keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil underneath. Jacob Braude


Life will hand Mary

No harder task

Than to know the right answer

And have no one ask.


A good problem statement often includes: (a) what is known, (b) what is unknown, and (c) what is sought. Edward Hodnett


Bear in mind that children of all ages close their ears to advice and open their eyes to example.


First Law of Debate Never argue with a fool. People may not be able to tell the difference.


Hitch your wagon to a star. R.W. Emerson


The hen is an egg’s way of producing another egg. Samuel Butler


Nothing is really work unless you’d rather be doing something else. James M. Barrie


Be virtuous and you will be eccentric. Mark Twain


The palest ink is better than the best memory. Chinese proverb


Don’t be agnostic - be something. Robert Frost


What is moral is what you feel good after. Ernest Hemingway


Gordon’s 1st Law: If a research project is not worth doing, it is not worth doing well.


The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. Shakespeare


You can’t write a term paper before breakfast. Charles Schultz


We know what we are, but not what we may be. Shakespeare


Schick’s Law: There is no problem a good miracle can’t solve.


Express a mean opinion of yourself occasionally; it will show your friends that you know how to tell the truth. Ed Howe


I’m a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. Thomas Jefferson


There’s no trick in being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. Will Rogers


Zoo: an excellent place to study the habits of human beings. Evan Esar


I know why God made babies cute…so we won’t kill ‘em. Gallagher


It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to paint it. Steven Wright


We’re all special cases. Albert Camus


Anything that can go wrong will go wrong faster with computers.


A manager is a person who thinks that nine women can produce a child in one month.


If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.


What we have here is an insurmountable opportunity. Yogi Berra


Learning is as natural a human passion as sex. Lewis J. Perelman


True charity is not a measure of how much one gives, but of how much one has left.


Happy people evaluate themselves; unhappy people evaluate others. Wm Glasser


IBM Pollyana Principle:

Machines should work;

people should think.


One of the greatest labor-saving devices of today is tomorrow. Vincent T. Foss


If at first you don’t succeed, think how many people you’ve made happy. H. Duane Black


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(Well, not completely blank, since the above non-empty disclaimer appears on the page. What is meant is that this page is devoid of meaningful content related to the rest of the document. This page serves only as a separator between sections, chapters, or other divisions of the document. This page is not completely blank so that you know that nothing was unintentionally left out, or that the page is not blank because of an error in duplication, or that the page is not blank because of some other production problem. If this page were really blank, you wouldn’t be reading anything. This page has not been left blank by accident, but is left non-blank on purpose. The statement on the page should say This page was intentionally left non-blank.)


Back stabbing colleagues, demanding superiors, impossible deadlines. It’s a wonder anyone makes it through first grade. Ashland Oil Ad,


We make the easy impossible.


It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare. Mark Twain


More than anytime in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly. Woody Allen

People find life entirely too time-consuming. Stanislaw J. Lec

I find that a great part of the information I have was acquired by looking up something and finding something else on the way. Franklin P. Adams

We are generally the better persuaded by the reasons we discover ourselves than by those given to us by others. Blaise Pascal

Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted. Martin Luther King Jr.

To punish me for my contempt for authority, fate made me an authority myself. Albert Einstein

You do what you think is right and let the law catch up. Thurgood Marshall

If you are seeking creative ideas, go out walking. Angels whisper to a man when he goes for a walk. ~Raymond Inmon

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the heck she is. ~ Ellen DeGeneres

A vigorous five-mile walk will do more good for an unhappy but otherwise healthy adult than all the medicine and psychology in the world. ~Paul Dudley White


Subject: Thoughts on MortalityI remember back when my parents were in their fifties. they started complaining/commenting that their friends were beginning to drop like flies. Then, earlier this week a friend of mine’s cousin died; and a few days later another one of his friends (a doctor from his community) died suddenly and unexpectedly. Thinking about their unexpected passings - and how shocked my friend was - got me to thinking that many of my own friends and colleagues are between 50 and death - i.e. old or quickly getting that way. Then I stumbled across this list, which I think is good advice to follow. 1. It’s time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Don’t just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law with big ideas for your hard-earned capital. Warning: This is also a bad time for investments, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries. This is a time for you to enjoy some peace and quiet.2. Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren, and don’t feel bad spending your money on yourself. You’ve taken care of them for many years, and you’ve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.3. Keep a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well and get your sleep. It’s easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. Stay informed.4. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together5. Don’t stress over the little things. Like paying a little extra on price quotes. You’ve already overcome so much in your life.You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.6. Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love your partner, love life, love your family, love your neighbor and remember: “A man is not old as long as he has intelligence and affection.”7. Be proud, both inside and out. Don’t stop going to your hair salon or barber, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked. When you are well-maintained on the outside, it seeps in, making you feel proud and strong.8. Don’t lose sight of fashion trends for your age, but keep your own sense of style. There’s nothing worse than an older person trying to wear the current fashion among youngsters. You’ve developed your own sense of what looks good on you – keep it and be proud of it. It’s part of who you are.9. ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised what old friends you’ll meet. Keeping in touch with what is going on and with the people you know is important at any age.10. Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideals as you, but they are the future, and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today.11. Never use the phrase: “In my time.” Your time is now. As long as you’re alive, you are part of this time. You may have been younger, but you are still you now, having fun and enjoying life.12. Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter. Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, it’ll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time with bitter people will make you older and harder to be around.13. Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren (if you have a financial choice, that is). Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our privacy. They need theirs and you need yours. If you’ve lost your partner (our deepest condolences), then find a person to move in with you and help out. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live alone.14. Don’t abandon your hobbies. If you don’t have any, make new ones. You can travel, hike, cook, read, dance. You can adopt a cat or a dog, grow a garden, play cards, checkers, chess, dominoes, golf. You can paint, volunteer or just collect certain items. Find something you like and spend some real time having fun with it.15. Even if you don’t feel like it, try to accept invitations. Baptisms, graduations, birthdays, weddings, conferences. Try to go. Get out of the house, meet people you haven’t seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). But don’t get upset when you’re not invited. Some events are limited by resources, and not everyone can be hosted. The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go walk through a field. Get out there.16. Be a conversationalist. Talk less and listen more. Some people go on and on about the past, not caring if their listeners are really interested. That’s a great way of reducing their desire to speak with you. Listen first and answer questions, but don’t go off into long stories unless asked to. Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are. Everyone is going through the same things, and people have a low tolerance for hearing complaints. Always find some good things to say as well.17. Pain and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try not to dwell on them but accept them as a part of the cycle of life we’re all going through. Try to minimize them in your mind. They are not who you are, they are something that life added to you. If they become your entire focus, you lose sight of the person you used to be.18. If you’ve been offended by someone – forgive them. If you’ve offended someone - apologize. Don’t drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It doesn’t matter who was right. Someone once said: “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Don’t take that poison. Forgive, forget and move on with your life.19. If you have a strong belief, savor it. But don’t waste your time trying to convince others. They will make their own choices no matter what you tell them, and it will only bring you frustration. Live your faith and set an example. Live true to your beliefs and let that memory sway them.20. Laugh. Laugh A LOT. Laugh at everything. Remember, you are one of the lucky ones. You managed to have a life, a long one. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life. But you did. So what’s not to laugh about? Find the humor in your situation.21. Take no notice of what others say about you and even less notice of what they might be thinking. They’ll do it anyway, and you should have pride in yourself and what you’ve achieved. Let them talk and don’t worry. They have no idea about your history, your memories and the life you’ve lived so far. There’s still much to be written, so get busy writing and don’t waste time thinking about what others might think. Now is the time to be at rest, at peace and as happy as you can be!