Introduction

Somewhere tropical: sandy beach, palm trees, blue sky. The sound of birds cawing in the distance can be heard, as can the waves lapping onto the shore. Four of the five Cuspidor Editors, JENNY, SUMIN, ANGELA, and MADI, are present, talking amongst themselves and enjoying the weather.

SONIA enters, holding a copy of the June Cuspidor in her hand. She walks over to the other Editors, who look pleased to see it.

SUMIN: (Excited.) This is it. The last issue of the Cuspidor. (She looks at the Cuspidor, in awe.)

SONIA: Hot off the press. We’re done. (pause.) Finally.

MADI: (Takes the Cuspidor from SONIA.) That’s amazing. (Flipping through.) No typos so far, either. We’re really done.

ANGELA: That’s why we’re here, isn’t it? Jenny brought us here to celebrate all our hard work on this year’s Cuspidor.

(The four younger Editors smile. However, JENNY, looking pensive, walks to the water’s edge. She skips a stone into the water and watches it sink. The other Editors, concerned, look over at her.)

JENNY: (Turning to face the Editors.) It’s not that simple, guys.

SUMIN: What do you mean? Aren’t we here to celebrate the publication of the June Cuspidor?

ANGELA: (Seeing JENNY’s expression.) Oh no, it’s a typo, isn’t it … or did we forget the quotes at the bottom of the page again?

SONIA: (Becoming concerned as well.) Or worse, the crossword?

JENNY: No, don’t worry, it’s not that. It’s just--it’s time that you guys finally learned the truth about the Cuspidor.

ANGELA: The truth?

JENNY: (This is obviously very hard for her.) I’ve been trying to protect you guys from this secret for the entire year, but I need to tell you now. We don’t have much time. Can you listen?

(The Editors nod in unison.)

JENNY: The Cuspidor is actually a branch of a top-secret international organization. We report news, stories, and articles from the UTS student body--and in our ceaseless efforts to report the truth, we’ve made ourselves some powerful enemies, who want to stop us at any cost.

MADI: What?! Who would want to stop a school publication?

JENNY: You’d be surprised, Madi. But, anyway, they’ve finally tracked down our new location at 30 Humbert.

SUMIN: (Shocked.) How can we stop them?

JENNY: We can’t do anything about it--the organization will take care of that. All we have to do is keep publishing the Cuspidor.

SUMIN: That’s good, I guess, but why did you tell us all this?

JENNY: Because I won’t be here for much longer. I need to complete another mission--this time, at a university publication. So next year, you four need to take the lead. Guard Cuspidor’s secrets and publish the truth for the world to see. Teach the next generation of editors to the best of your ability, so that they can take over for you, when it’s your turn to leave on a new mission as well.

(The noise of a helicopter can be heard, first faintly and then louder as it grows closer and comes into sight. A ladder extends down from the cockpit. JENNY motions towards it.)

JENNY: That’s my ride. Good luck, Editors. (She climbs up the ladder.)

(The four remaining editors look somewhat shocked, but wave goodbye to JENNY as the helicopter lifts off.)

ANGELA: Did that really just happen?

SONIA: Yep, it’s not just you. I guess that means that next year is going to be even more interesting than this one.

MADI: Interesting? More like scary. But I know we can handle it, as long as we work together.

(The other Editors nod their assent. They stand together on the beach, a little sad, but resolute.)