April Fools!
Happy April Fools Day!
On this day, may you be tricked, treated, and brought to tears (be it out of joy, fear, or sadness) by the great work of the Hilltopper staff. Cheers to burning cash on coffee, accumulating more absences, and walking the great halls that are the Needham High 100s.
Look over there! Made you look :)
RES
*** No work shall be taken seriously. Seriously! ***
Courtesy of Starbucks
By Lucy Mackey and Julia Most
Local students report spending $200,000 a year on coffee at the multiple coffee shops located in Needham, Massachusetts. From Starbucks to French Press to Dunkin, the options are plentiful, but the prices are ludicrous. Even disregarding costs comparable to a mortgage, students are still faced with a tough choice: getting a coffee to get them through the treacherous school day, or having enough credits to graduate.
Courtesy of Miriam Bergeron and Aideen Milligan
By Miriam Bergeron and Aideen Milligan
So, you’re late for school. Hey, it’s no big deal! Whether you slept in or got stuck in traffic, Needham High’s accommodating attendance policy will have you calm and collected on your commute. You walk into class but aren’t stressed because you’ve just received an absence for walking in 10 minutes late. How thoughtful of the administration to think of you!
Courtesy of Memory Maps
By Owen Woo
It’s that time of year again: Needham High School's free agency has begun. Teachers can now begin to strengthen their rosters by signing, or trading, for students. Some major moves have already transpired. The first big move that should be addressed is 4.0 gpa, 5x all-AP student Douglas Farley is signing a two-semester contract with another historic program: AP Literature.
Courtesy of TripAdvisor
Your "harmless" one-coffee-a day habit has turned into the equivalent of having a mild gambling addiction or a large horse, at $32,497. You could buy a one-and-a-half-bath in Needham with that kind of money (not a house with two bathrooms, only one that has a shower. Literally just a bathtub and another half of a bathtub. Not the bottom half. So it wouldn’t work anyway. You don’t get to pick the half).
Courtesy of Wicked Local
By Lily Katz
Now, before we announce the show, we would like to re-state the role that the SAMD board plays in the theater community. Our jobs include selecting the show that is most likely to anger Mr. Sicotte as our fall production, casting ourselves and the rest of the auditionees in each show, admitting only our best friends onto the SAMD board, and paying Ms. Mazzocchi and Mr. Vanderwoude with the money that we raise at our annual SAMD soiree.
Courtesy of Amelie Zosa
By Amelie Zosa
Hunting down a fashionista of the month is difficult work, which is why I always ask my friends for advice. And let me tell you, you all are not helpful. 99% of all answers I receive to the question, “Who do you think I should interview for fashionista this month” are “me!” or “you!” Now listen, if I wanted to interview YOU, the person I’m looking at, asking who to interview, I would’ve done it already. And until now, I’ve always figured I can’t interview myself. That would be ridiculous. Well, this month, I’m tired.
Courtesy of Christine Mittaz
By Emily Flanagan and Emma Zhang
Oh, the 100s! Are they green because there are science classes down there or are there science classes down there because they are green? The world may never know. But what we do know is that the right color for a science folder is green. There’s nothing like walking down that lovely hallway, nose wrinkling in admiration at the refreshing smell that can only be found in this dungeon-like (in a cute way) area of Needham High School.
Courtesy of Poetry4Kids
By Eli Kajmo
On February 31st, 2023, one of Needham High School's custodians accidentally flipped a secret switch located in the 100s, revealing a hidden room sheltering a trio of gray, humanoid aliens huddled together in what appeared to be the debris of a crashed spaceship, roasting a can of beans over a fire.
Courtesy of The Philadelphia Sunday Sun
By Emma Zhang
Once upon a time, in a beautiful place known as the Ununited States of Camiera, there was a state known as Bajinka. ... Oh, and I almost forgot to mention that Bajinka could talk, and it was pretty scary when it did, but it didn’t mind giving a bit of the candy to the creatures, as long as they wouldn’t harm it. Other than that, Bajinka was amazing.