Breaking News: Aliens Discovered Hiding In School Basement

On February 31st, 2023, one of Needham High School's custodians accidentally flipped a secret switch

located in the 100s, revealing a hidden room sheltering a trio of gray, humanoid aliens huddled together in what appeared to be the debris of a crashed spaceship, roasting a can of beans over a fire. Communication was difficult due to the interstellar language barrier, but eventually, we were able to glean some information from the extraterrestrials. The aliens identified themselves as Ewkbhgfpkjf’oi, Qetjkfniyevigy, and Pkaerigfnuybawlfighjbhsckyuegu and told our intrepid reporters that their home planet was located in the far off Ouqfwybo8q4uigkf7Ih2cru0ugy system. They had reportedly gotten lost during a late-night Home Depot run two years ago and had been hiding in a forgotten room in the 100’s ever since. Relations seem to be going well at the moment. However, while I was exploring their crashed ship, I found a box labeled “disintegration rays'' conveniently written in perfect English. When confronted with this information, Qetjkfniyevigy replied: “Don’t worry about it, just trust me bro” so I doubt there is reason to worry.