When working with peers or your teachers, it is very important to listen effectively. One aspect of listening is to gain new information or a new understanding that you didn't have before. But another aspect of listening that can be critical is the nonverbal message you are sending your peer or teacher. When you sit and listen to a speaker, you are sending little bits of communication all the time in the way you position your body, your arms, your eyes and head, and your facial features. You can send a message of encouragement, of interest, of inquiry, or you can send a more negative message of disinterest, disapproval, or boredom.
SLANT
Take a proactive role as a listener and support your peers and teachers by displaying only positive messages. You may find that a presentation improves, your friend remembers what they had wanted to say, your teacher feels more inclined to support you, or a new acquaintance becomes certain they like you and want to work with you further.
Sit Up Straight
You are not tired, and you are not bored. The image you want the speaker to see is someone engaged in what they are saying. Sit like you are about to eat dinner, and you are so hungry you want to almost lean over your food and take in the smells as they waft outwards. The speaker should see you as interested to the point that you are worried you might miss something.
Listen
Listening is easy in that it uses a part of our body, our ears, that have been functioning since before we were born. Yet, it can be difficult in that much of what we hear we do not remember. When you listen, you should repeatedly play back what the speaker has said. You need to remember their words when you have follow up conversations with them later. You need to listen closely, so that if the statements are meant to cause surprise, questioning, disgust, appreciation or satisfaction, you are prepared to exhibit that emotional response nonverbally.
Answer and Ask Questions
While clearly not a nonverbal mode of communication, this is a fundamental component of effective listening and engagement. Speakers often involve the audience in their presentation by asking a question, and you should be prepared to participate. Often in a one-on-one conversation with a peer, there should be a back and forth question and answer that shows you are invested in what's being said.
Nod to Show Interest
Only good things come from the speaker feeling more confident. They will communicate their message more clearly. They will leave you with a lasting impression of what they've said. They will be more convincing in their arguments. And you can promote that confidence and their feeling that you care about them and their message by nodding your head to show agreement and interest.
Track the Speaker
Speakers often don't stay in one place. They will change their position to beside a projector screen to directly in front of the audience to the side of the room. Each time they move, you should follow them... with your eyes. They see it when you do it. It communicates that you are going with them on the journey, and you want to see what comes of their presentation. It communicates a sense of community, of togetherness.
Mendler, Allen. "Teaching Your Students How to Have a Conversation." Social and Emotional Learning. Edutopia, 5 Nov. 2013. Web. 17 May 2015. <http://www.edutopia.org/blog/teaching-your-students-conversation-allen-mendler>.