Fat Girl Does Extra Laps After Ballet Class

dance class is at 4.

there’s a recital next weekend

her mother makes sure

she has her tap shoes and her dance bag

the dance teacher makes sure that

there’s ballerina spun sugar

for fat girl to eat.

when you’re 7

and you have a recital tomorrow,

you don’t really question why your parents

make you do extra laps after class.

you don’t notice that you don’t look like the other ballerinas.

there is no worry about your gut in a purple leotard

no shame about the rolls on your back when en barre

no tears when you’re trying to remember a kick ball change

no worry about your chins when your neck is supposed to be raised high

never any snacks after class when you’re surrounded by mirrors

your reflection has always been a tutu in a washing machine,

struggling to get into position 3.

dance class is eternal now. and

baby fat is never just baby fat

fat girl lets her parents watch her exercise,

watch as they turn the world backwards

just to try not to say fat,

never knowing that the word they were looking for

was there this whole time

right in front of them,

struggling to get into position 3.

Flash Issue 9