We sit in the car with thick tension only the two of us can feel. As I wait for the luminescent red light to change, the chatter of our other friends begins to fade. I cannot pull away my gaze as I look at you through the rearview mirror. The glow of the sunset through the window is like a spotlight enhancing your beauty. 

A bubbling feeling surfaces in my throat, and I imagine what being in your embrace would be like. My heart yearns to hold you in mine, but I know we cannot be together, for it is true we have reputations. We’d be free bait for them to judge us, and I won’t let you walk on those eggshells. We may keep it secret if you promise; this way, we won't have to feel alone in our pining. We can keep our secret for us, and us only. Then I would not have to bottle my love for you in the chains of my mind. I could tell you how much I love you without the knot in my throat holding me back. You are perfect in my eyes, and your smile is my favorite sight, but to say that out loud is impossible. This distance is aching, so heartbreaking. I hope one day I can be close to you. I only need one chance to see you, a chance to truly see you. Once more to see you.*

*inspired from a song by Mitski