Permits

This was another little gift from the fire. I wrote it in September, 2007. The recording is from another year-end benefit at our local club. It was missing most of the guitar track, so I had to overdub. Came out ok.

Permits.mp3

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Lyrics

I had a little fire the other day, it burned up part of my home.

The insurance guy said they’d pay but I knew I couldn’t fix it alone.

I was gonna need to get an architect, need to get a contractor or two.

I headed on down to the city to see what else I needed to do.

I waited a while ‘till my name was called, then stepped up to the desk.

I asked 'em a bunch of questions, mostly they said it was anybody’s guess.

They didn’t have much information, but they had their standard rap.

And by the time that they were done I knew that I was deep in crap. ‘Cause they said

You're gonna need a permit if you want to lock your door.

You're gonna need a permit to put in a bamboo floor.

You're gonna need a permit if you want to switch on a light.

And you're gonna need a permit to sleep under a roof at night.

You're gonna need a permit if you want to water your lawn.

You're gonna need a permit if you want to flush your john.

You're gonna need a permit for anything you want to do.

And you're gonna need a permit to apply for a permit too.

I was getting angry as I heard these words.

I couldn’t help but wondering what kind of bunch of nerds

Could act with so much arrogance, could be so in the way.

I tried to hold my tong, but then I heard myself say

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit to put a lock on my door.

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit to put in a bamboo floor.

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit if I want to switch on a light.

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit to sleep under my roof at night.

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit if I want to water my lawn.

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit if to flush my stinkin' john. No

I don’t need no stinkin’ permit. And as I raised my fist

I said you’d better reconsider or we just might permit this.

I guess you can imagine what happened after that.

I spent the night in jail, but I took ‘em to the mat.

The judge was sympathetic, he had seen it all before.

They’d tried the same with him and he was still a little sore, so he said

You don’t need no permit if you want to lock your door.

You don’t need no permit to put in a bamboo floor.

You don’t need no permit if you want to switch on your light.

You don’t need no permit to sleep under your roof at night.

You don’t need no permit, go ahead and water your lawn.

You sure don’t need no permit, please flush your stinkin' john.

You don’t need a permit for anything you want to do.

You’re free to go and may the building gods smile down on you.