Chapter 27

I CAN SEE the effect the word kill has on Zahira, and it almost makes me wish I didn’t tell her that. She’s frozen. Completely frozen.

And then the ice cracks and she looks like she might just melt right through the floorboards.

“Okay.” She wilts back, and Aaron steadies her. She doesn’t squirm away at the contact. Her eyes are unfocused, and I can tell she’s turning that word over and over in her head.

Kill.

“Okay,” she says again, breathlessly, and I watch her with eyes still blurry with tears. There’s no fight behind what she’s saying. No strength. Okay, not because she means it. Okay, because there is nothing else she can say.

Some kind of calm settles over me. This is it, then. The last time I’ll see her. She won’t come with me anymore.

And that’s the way it should be.

While she’s busy blinking away her daze and Aaron is trying to calm her down, I skirt around them and grab my backpack.

“Wait,” Zahira says. She sounds like she’s about to throw up. “Dany, wait, where are you going?”

“Away,” I say, and march to the door.

“No,” she says.

“You’re scared. That’s fine. I’m leaving.”

“Dany, I’m taking you. I told you I’m taking you.”

I whirl around. “Why? Did you hear anything I just said?”

“Yeah, I heard they’re going to take you. You think I’m going to let that happen?”

Let. Let. It’s always that let. “So, what?” I say. “You’re fine with dying?”

“No,” she snarls. “I’m not fine with dying. But I’m not fine with letting them take you, either.”

“Zahira,” Aaron says.

“What?”

“We should call the cops.”

Zahira draws back. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“The TV. They said we should call the cops.”

“No!”

“Maybe they can help.”

“Did you not hear what Dany said? The cops are working with—with Them. They’re not going to help us.”

“So what are we supposed to do?”

“Not we,” she says, jabbing a finger in his chest. “Just me and Dany.”

Us, my own thoughts echo back at me. There isn’t supposed to be an us. But Zahira is still brute-forcing her way into this, and I don’t know how to feel. Part of me is thankful. The other part sneers, idiot.

“You stay here with JJ,” she goes on. “Tell him whatever you think he’ll believe. And for god’s sake, don’t do anything stupid. We’re leaving now.”

“Leaving?” JJ says at the kitchen door, and thank the almighty lord none of us flinch because that would really telegraph something is wrong. “But…what about dinner?”

“I’m sorry,” Zahira says, and I’m impressed by how quickly she can school her scared face into a calm one. It reminds me of Marisa—no. No more thoughts of Marisa. “Family emergency. Something happened, and I—we have to go right now.”

“It can’t wait?” JJ asks. His eyes are so big and worried that it makes me feel guilty for leaving him. But I’d feel even more guilty if I stayed and got him into trouble.

Zahira says, “I’m sorry. It can’t. You can put the baklava in the freezer for now. And I need to borrow your car. I’ll bring it back tomorrow, I promise.”

“Well.” JJ looks troubled, his eyes going between me and Zahira and Aaron like he might be able to catch the secret hovering between us. “Well. Okay. The keys are on the plate in the entryway.”

“Thank you.” She hugs JJ, which seems to startle him. “I’m sorry. And I—I’ll bring it back in time for the date. Promise.”

I wish she hadn’t said that. Now I have to make sure she keeps that promise.

Zahira gathers her stuff, and JJ watches, wringing his hands. As we leave, he says, “Bye! Nice to meet you!”

I clutch the edge of the door. I should turn around. I should look at him one last time. Smile. Apologize. Say a proper goodbye. It’s the least I can do, after everything he’s done for me.

But if I see his big, dark eyes again, I will fall apart.

“Goodbye,” I say through the door, and pull it shut before I can change my mind.