Someindustries

Pre-lore

Five businessmen founded the Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing Company as a mining venture in Two Harbors, Minnesota, making their first sale on June 13, 1902. The goal was to mine corundum, a crystalline form of aluminium oxide, which failed because the mine's mineral holdings were anorthosite, a feldspar which had no commercial value. Co-founder John Dwan solicited funds in exchange for stock and Edgar Ober and Lucius Ordway took over the company in 1905. The company moved to Duluth and began researching and producing sandpaper products. William L. McKnight, later a key executive, joined the company in 1907, and A. G. Bush joined in 1909. 3M finally became financially stable in 1916 and was able to pay dividends.

The company moved to Saint Paul in 1910, where it remained for 52 years before outgrowing the campus and moving to its current headquarters at 3M Center in Maplewood, Minnesota, in 1962.

In 1947, 3M began producing perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA), an industrial surfactant and chemical feedstock, by electrochemical fluorination. In 1951, DuPont purchased PFOA from then-Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing Company for use in the manufacturing of teflon, a product that brought DuPont a billion-dollar-a-year profit by the 1990s. DuPont referred to PFOA as C8. The original formula for Scotchgard, a water repellent applied to fabrics, was discovered accidentally in 1952 by 3M chemists Patsy Sherman and Samuel Smith. Sales began in 1956, and in 1973 the two chemists received a patent for the formula.

In the late 1950s, 3M produced the first asthma inhaler, but the company did not enter the pharmaceutical industry until the mid-1960s with the acquisition of Riker Laboratories, moving it from California to Minnesota. 3M retained the Riker Laboratories name for the subsidiary until at least 1985. In the mid-1990s, 3M Pharmaceuticals, as the division came to be called, produced the first CFC-free asthma inhaler in response to adoption of the Montreal Protocol by the United States. In the 1980s and 1990s, the company spent fifteen years developing a topical cream delivery technology which led in 1997 to health authority approval and marketing of a symptomatic treatment for genital warts, Aldara. 3M divested its pharmaceutical unit through three deals in 2006, netting more than US$2 billion. At the time, 3M Pharmaceuticals comprised about 20% of 3M's healthcare business and employed just over a thousand people.

By the 1970s, 3M developed a theatrical blood formula based on red colorfast microbeads suspended in a carrier liquid. This stage blood was sold as Nextel Simulated Blood and was used during the production of the 1978 film Dawn of the Dead. It has since been discontinued.

In the late 1970s, 3M Mincom was involved in some of the first digital audio recordings to see commercial release when a prototype machine was brought to the Sound 80 studios in Minneapolis. In 1979 3M introduced a digital audio recording system called "3M Digital Audio Mastering System".

3M launched "Press 'n Peel" a sticky bookmark page holder in stores in four cities in 1977, but the results were disappointing. A year later 3M instead issued free samples of it as a sticky note directly to consumers in Boise, Idaho, with 95% of those who tried them indicating they would buy the product. The product was sold as "Post-Its" in 1979 when the rollout introduction began, and was sold across the United States from April 6, 1980. The following year they were launched in Canada and Europe.

In 1980, the company acquired Comtal, a manufacturer of digital image processors.

Post-lore

In 1972, some bitch named Hott McSenry was probably high on LSD when he declared "fuck it, time to make a company." This company, named Someindustries, was what is today the Video & Media division of Someindustries. At the time, the company was only in one industry, so the name "Someindustries" made no sense. 

In 1978, the year of Luigi, the unrelated McHott Senry founded a transport division under the name "Logistics Inc.", a limited liability company. This company will be useful later.

1993½ marked a turning point for Someindustries, because it didn't exist before this. I mean, it did, but did it really? In this year, the unrelated Scott McHenry founded a security company and managed it for about three days before John Someindustries said "fuck you, I'm buying some companies," and bought the security company, logistics company, and media company, merging them under the Someindustries brand name.

Someindustries played no part in the death of former U.S. president Ronald Reagan in June 2004.

Someindustries is infamous for its support of the LGBTQ+ community, with SomeProducts releasing a 'pride' edition of nearly every product at a 50% markup every June. In January 2025, amidst the winding down of DEI programs by other companies, Someindustries announced it would be ramping up its own, saying that no cisgender heterosexual white men will be hired until 2029.

In Paxuary 2027, Someindustries Security received widespread public attention for [REDACTED].

This is, of course, all complete horseshit made up for the lore. The real history of Someindustries is quite different.

Someindustries Security

Someindustries Security, commonly referred to as Someind Security, is the private security division of Someindustries. Someind Security provides private security services to public and private properties. It also provides roadside assistance services on some interstates in Ohio, where it is referred to as "ODOT Safety Patrol Sponsored By Someindustries Security", because GEICO doesn't exist. In addition, Someind Security provides vehicle escorts to oversize loads and high-risk funerals, among other things, totally without committing felonies. Additionally, Someind Security can also help emergency services in emergency situations, because Someind Security is a saint and can do no wrong.

Someindustries Logistics

Someindustries Logistics, commonly referred to as Someind Logistics, is the logistics division of Someindustries. Someind Logistics ships goods and services from one unspecified location to another unspecified location. These goods and services can be shipped over the road by trucks or buses (via Someind Charter), over rails by trains or pumpy thing, over the water by vessel, or over the air by planes, pigeon, or radio.

Someindustries Private Investigations

Someindustries Private investigations, commonly referred to as Someind PI, is the private investigations division of Someindustries. It supposedly investigates things, but lets be honest, it's just autistic ramblings and homosexuality.

Some News Network

Some News Network, or SNN, is the news division of Someindustries. SNN provides unbiased™ news coverage of current events. That's all it does. Nothing more.

Someindustries Engineering

Someindustries Engineering does not do anything.

Someindustries Video & Media

Someindustries Video & Media, sometimes referred to as Someind Vid & Med, creates and provides video and media services, mostly for internal use by Someindustries. Some things they create include logos and bumper idents.

SomeProducts

SomeProducts, which has no alternate name, is the manufacturing division of Someindustries. SomeProducts creates and sells multiple different products, including Baskatchuans from Saskatchewans, road signage, computers, and Brick™.

Someindustries Political Subterfuge

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Learn why

This information does not exist. It has never existed. It will never exist. Someindustries has no controversies. Someindustries is a perfect company that has never done anything wrong. Those who say otherwise are detractors trying to mislead you. Someindustries has always been at war with Eurasia.

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