Scapa Flow 1

Post date: Sep 30, 2010 7:39:11 AM

At the beginning of September, member’s of Saint Divers joined by members of Timpkins Diving Club, travelled to the Orkneys to dive Scapa Flow. The trip had been planned for some time and ended up being a bit like the film “Trains, Planes and Automobiles” with different modes of transport being taken.

Helen managed to get us a great deal on transporting our kit with a courier which enabled many of us to fly. This was a very relaxing way of getting there although some of the smaller planes were very exciting when they were coming in to land.

When we arrived at our hotel it was noticed that tea bags were on a drying rack ready to be re-used. I don’t know if this was the policy of this hotel only or a frugal Scottish custom. Needless to say we opened a new packet. There was some relief not to find toilet paper drying on the washing line.

Our boat, the Jean Elaine, was skippered by Andy and was a traditional fishing boat now used to transport divers to the various wrecks in Scapa Flow. It was well kitted out with plenty of room and Mark, the chef, did a fantastic job of looking after us, preparing delicious food and endless cups of tea. Barry took a particular shine to Mark.

Andy was efficient and accommodating. When we jumped off the side, missed the wreck and had to come back on board he didn’t complain at all about letting us have another go. Nor did he complain when some of our divers decided to board a completely different boat.

My only criticism of the boat is that the bloody thing would never stay still. Fortunately I took Sturgeron every morning but the effect took me back to my misspent teenage years. We did lose a couple of days diving due to strong winds which caused rough seas. Remarkably for Scotland it hardly rained at all. If it had it might have made the place seem desolate and forlorn.

One day we witnessed the above event. A sailing boat had got into trouble and had to be towed back by the life boat. A couple of days later the local newspaper reported that a local sailor had got drunk again and had to be towed back to shore.

The fishing boats went out regardless and as their bows dipped into the waves they disappeared into the spray. It made me glad that my work is very much land based and stringent risk assessments prevent me leaving my office if its doing anything more than spitting. I have a great deal of admiration for the fisherman who go out in all weathers.

For those of you who do not know about Scapa Flow it is where the German navy scuttled their entire fleet. 78 ships in total. The British who were guarding them went off for the day to do some naval exercises. When they returned the ships had sunk. Anyone who has ever seen Whiskey Galore can appreciate how this would have made for a fantastic Ealing Comedy. Maybe one day. Anyway, to say it made us look incompetent is a bit of an understatement.

Fortunately for us it means amazing diving on some huge wrecks in relatively shallow and sheltered waters. That is usually the case. The strong winds led to Stoney Cove on a Saturday morning levels of visibility. Despite that we did plenty of diving. Some more than others. This could be due to the delicious Scapa whisky or perhaps being unfortunate enough to follow the wrong shot line.

Despite drinking more alcohol in a week than I would usually drink in a week and a half I did manage to do all the dives. Never let it be said that I get narked though. Putting a starfish on my head and giggling is the sort of thing I would do whilst snorkelling in shallow water. I can’t think why my buddy gave me a gesticulation usually reserved for other road users.

I would like to give a huge thank you to Julie for organising the hotel and boat for us. Despite my disparaging remarks about the hotel (the tea bags are true though – shame on you!) the hotel was comfortable and provided all the facilities we required. It had a fish and chip shop and a pub opposite which I think is how it achieved two stars.

Thank you too to Helen who put a lot of time and effort into transporting our kit to Scapa Flow and back again. In fact there is a funny story about that. The reason it went on two pallets is because when it was being put on the lorry one of the boxes fell off the top. Helen was in tears and furious with the courier and devastated that despite all her efforts someone might not have been able to dive. Worse still it might have been one of the rebreather boxes. Fortunately it was my box which was on the top and nothing was broken although I think Keith’s cable ties might have been damaged by the shock wave.

Keith searches for the seal clubber

Thank you to Chris for his excellent presentation prior to the trip. It was very informative and for those of us who had not visited Scapa before gave us an insight into what to expect.

There was a bit of an incident on the way home. Kirkwall airport has a luggage reconciliation room. We surmised that this was for travellers whose luggage had gone missing for a long time to be able to have a reunion in private and hug their suitcase and shed a few tears. After checking in our suitcases we were having breakfast when an announcement requested Mr McTaggart to come to the luggage reconciliation room. Instantly I clenched expecting rubber gloves. When I arrived they asked me to unlock my suitcase. The x-ray display showed a metal object which resembled a gun.

Barry showing off at the prowess of his pee valve and Mick hiding from the Revenue

If I had been returning from seeing my friend who lives in Amsterdam that would not have surprised me as he is a less than salubrious character. In fact one of our mutual friends spent 24 hours in the custody of Her Majesty’s Customs and Excise after some cat worming tablets were planted in his pocket. On this occasion I was fairly confident that there was not a gun in my suitcase. What they pulled out was Sue’s ankle weights. In fact Sue, I don’t think I’ve told you yet, but I have your ankle weights. Which explains why my case was three kilos heavier on the way back than when I went.