Let's talk. I have some available times on Tuesday. We can clarify what I say below.
1. A listening workshop for the general public.
Here is the outline I sent you. I think I put it up on the Google doc we were sharing. This includes material from my half-day listening programs for corporations and universities that I offered about 15 years ago. I think it is a good program. It includes several overlaps with other listening topics that you list in your curriculum suggestions. I'd like to work with you to define the program's desired outcomes for the general public.
When we clarify what we want, I'd like to work with you to develop the program and present it to a small audience as a warm-up. Looks like I may have to develop a PowerPoint to go with it. I have never facilitated a listening program online
2. An empathic listening program for YOUR trainers.
Seems like we need YOU to clarify that word-for-word repetition does not create empathy and is not how you want empathy circles facilitated or new people trained. Bill has been clear that repeating is all that participants can do. You, I, and many others in your Saturday conference empathy circles were skilled listeners. I don't want this discussion with Bill and Daniel to be during a workshop with others present.
Meeting summary
Edwin and Susan discussed developing a 2.5-hour workshop on deepening listening skills for empathy circle practitioners. They explored how to move beyond simple paraphrasing to capture the felt sense and essence of what speakers share, drawing on approaches from Rogers, focusing, and other experiential methods. The conversation covered workshop structure, including using video examples, small group practice sessions, and modeling deeper listening techniques. They discussed potential challenges around working with existing empathy circle trainers like Bill and Daniel while respecting their established methods. Susan agreed to create a draft outline incorporating their discussion points and timing considerations, with plans to meet again after Susan returns from travel on the 17th.
Susan proposed developing an online listening program based on her previous experiential training work with Stanford and Bechtel Engineering, suggesting a potential two-and-a-half-hour course for the existing empathy workshop community. Edwin agreed to co-lead the program and suggested starting with a basic course focused on deeper listening and speaking skills for the existing empathy circles community. The discussion highlighted the need to address current issues in empathy circles where participants often expect brief reflections after sharing ideas.
Edwin and Susan discussed approaches to empathy circle training, with Edwin suggesting a 2.5-hour workshop to teach deeper listening skills rather than correcting existing methods. Susan expressed concerns about challenging Bill Filler's approach, as she has a long-standing friendship with him and he became upset when she previously advocated for paraphrasing over repeating. The discussion focused on finding a way to support Bill and Daniel's method while also introducing deeper empathy practices without creating conflict.
Edwin presented an AI-generated outline for a two-hour empathy circle workshop designed to help practitioners move beyond simple parroting to deeper, active listening and authentic speaking. The workshop aims to teach participants how to listen for underlying emotions, core values, and felt sense while speaking from a place of deeper presence through resonant reflection. Susan expressed approval of the concept and suggested potentially co-leading the workshop with three people, though the discussion ended before details could be fully developed.
Susan and Edwin discussed a workshop activity involving voice mirroring, where participants repeat what the leader says simultaneously to help develop active listening skills. Susan explained how she learned this technique from an improvisational teacher and demonstrated it with Edwin during their meeting. They agreed to continue reviewing the workshop content together, with Edwin suggesting they could incorporate elements from Alan Alda's book on empathy and improvisation.
Susan and Edwin discussed the approach for their training, agreeing to focus on Rogers rather than Non-Violent Communication (NVC) due to its complexity. They explored the concept of going deeper by being aware of felt experiences and sharing them, with Edwin explaining his perspective on needs as desired feelings. The conversation concluded with them planning to demonstrate the process using a focusing approach, where participants would explore feelings beyond words, with Susan confirming their desired outcome of helping participants develop a sense of felt sense.
Edwin and Susan discussed developing a model for empathic listening that focuses on translating felt experiences into words and demonstrating present-moment body awareness. Susan proposed creating a listening model with encoding and decoding components, incorporating videos of effective listening (including examples from Carl Rogers and potentially Alan Jandlin), and practicing the technique in empathy circles with participants sharing important personal topics. They agreed to explore additional resources, including focusing trainers like Ann Weiser Cornell, and to model the listening approach themselves while ensuring the examples remain spontaneous and authentic.
Susan and Edwin discussed different approaches to listening exercises, comparing Alan's model with empathy circles. They agreed that the empathy circle approach had a more equal and experiential structure compared to Alan's more guru-centered method. The conversation then moved to incorporating Thomas Gordon's list of poor listening habits and William Miller's book "Listening Well" into their training program, with Susan suggesting using a handout to present this information efficiently. Finally, they discussed a potential exercise where participants would speak for specific time periods followed by reflections, with Edwin proposing a three-minute speaking format with corresponding reflections.
Edwin and Susan discussed developing a training approach for empathy circles that focuses on active listening and deeper reflection. They agreed to start with a small group of 10 people for initial prototypes, with plans to include experienced facilitators and those who view parenting as a holistic process. The training would incorporate exercises like one-sentence reflections followed by varying reflection times to help participants tune into their own and others' inner experiences, particularly focusing on felt emotions during conflicts.
Edwin and Susan discussed planning a workshop focused on empathy and felt experience, agreeing to limit the group to 6-8 people and incorporating empathy circles into the format. Susan will create a draft outline with timing for the workshop sequence before her trip to Ohio, which she plans to send to Edwin as an email attachment. They scheduled their next meeting for Friday, the 17th at 2 PM, after Susan returns from her trip on the 14th.
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