I'm certain that if anyone begins to read the tale of Antidotum, he or she will inevitably point out that I completely lack any literary talent. However, this is nothing new to me.

Before any haters think that they're the first to hate, let me tell you all about my lack of literary talent.

When I went to school for the first time to learn how to read and write, I quickly memorized how to spell the words. Most likely I was the fastest in my class to memorize the spelling of each word, and I got much better grades on spelling tests than anybody else.

However, when it came to writing essays or any text for any reason, my teachers were beyond bewildered at my sentences.

I was only seven yrold, when I got a barely passing score on my first essay. The teacher thought that I wasn't trying, so she gave me that score to make me work harder, but I was doing my best. She tried to tutor me to improve my writing, but instead she realized my utter nonexistent literary talent, and gave up. From that day on, she gave me average scores out of pity.

Time passed, I advanced classes, and teachers changed.

The next teacher gave me a zero on my first essay. I asked her why, and she explained, but I understood none of that. I got many zeroes in a row on my essays before the teacher realized how talentless I am, and out of pity she passed me.

Afterward, it was always the same. Every new teacher always started by giving me a very low score, and once they realized how "talented" I am in writing, they'd start giving me a barely passing score out of pity.

The first time I got a higher than average score on my essay was in an American college, because my point of view on the topic was exactly the same as the professor's. Thus I learned, that in college, one doesn't need a literary talent to pass. Instead, one must know what the professor wants to read.

So what makes my writing so horrible?

To state it simply - my brain.

My thought processes aren't the same as most people. For all humans, there's this rule - what you think is what you write. Whether it's your speech or your writing, it all originates from the thoughts in your brain, and my brain has this abnormal tendency to unnaturally complicate things beyond necessary measures.

Of course, I don't blame my brain.

Rather, I find it enjoyable that I am able to look at the world through my mind in a way that is impossible for others. It feels like being able to see colors in a world, where everyone else can only see black and white.

Naturally, it's difficult for me to communicate with people, but I'd rather not talk to anyone than lose my ability to think beyond the limits of my mind, because it is so refreshing and relaxing to just let my thoughts flow freely, paradoxically, nonsensically, without any borders or rules to govern them, sometimes wordlessly, rarely imagelessly, often soundlessly, wildly yet harmoniously like nature.

I love being inside my mind.

And the worst moment is when I have to leave my mind, and interact with humans in the real world.

By the way, did you know that you can recreate anything your senses can feel in your mind? Just like you can create words in your thoughts, which only you can hear, you can also create in that same manner images, sounds, smells, tastes, sensations such as of cold or hot or pain.

When most people say imagination, they mean an image inside your mind. But inside my mind there is another world, which to me is far more real than this place, which you call reality.

So if I had to lose my literary talent to gain this world in my mind, then I surely don't regret it. I would happily give up everything, my body, my life, all my skills and talents, just for this world in my mind. Because if I didn't have this world inside me, I surely wouldn't be alive anymore. There's nothing in the so-called "reality" that could keep me imprisoned in this "real world" other than my ability to imagine.

Sadly I'm unable to describe everything I imagine.

Even though, my inner world is as vast as the universe itself, if I were to begin writing down all the details, then just one scene would take forever to describe. So unfortunately, I only choose to write what I consider relevant, while omitting all those amazing elements, which no one will know about simply because they're just details.