Because we all value relationships and people, we generally like the idea of being nice to others. We like saying “yes” to requests, doing favors for people, and lending a helping hand. But in business, we need to learn to be nice without being taken advantage of. Being too nice— and especially being too nice in the beginning stages of business development—can put a business in real jeopardy.

Many cultures develop standards and norms that suggest that saying “no” is inappropriate when someone needs something that another person has. In third-world countries, this standard is very prevalent. For example, if someone sees something he likes in another person’s house, that person might compliment the home owner on the item. The compliment usually makes the home owner feel obligated to offer the item to the other person. The same pattern is often found in business: business owners feel pressure to be “kind,” and they end up giving away needed business resources. Again, being kind is good; but it is not a profitable business strategy during the opening stages of business.

Jesus’ parable of the good Samaritan teaches that although we should be generous with what we have, our greatest responsibility is to take care of our own families first. The good Samaritan was clearly a nice person—he offered significant assistance to a man whom he did not know and from whom he expected no repayment or thanks. The Samaritan took the wounded man out of a dangerous situation, paid for his medical treatment, and arranged for his temporary housing and food. We all know that part of the story. But we often fail to see the message behind the message: the Samaritan was in a position to give away his money because he had already acquired sufficient material goods and wealth. In other words, the fact that the Samaritan had a donkey, the trust of the innkeeper (suggesting that he had good credit with the innkeeper), and money enough to pay for some expenses up front indicates that the Samaritan had previously built up a supply of goods and money. He had previously had to say “no” so that he could now say “yes.”

You can learn an important lesson from the parable of the good Samaritan: businesses need capital in order to grow and become more profitable. If you, in an attempt to be nice, give away that capital or merchandise instead of investing it in the business, you will be unable to fund the growth of your business, and you will eventually be left with nothing. Trying to build a business while also giving away money, merchandise, or jobs that don’t really need to be done is foolish and helps no one in the end.

If, instead, you can learn to tell friends and family members “no” in the beginning, you can eventually use your business’ increased capital to produce more wealth and more opportunities to help others. For example, if you choose to be nice later, you will have sufficient money to give discounts later on, to donate merchandise to family members in need, and to hire family friends as employees—thus helping those people help their own families.