#191 - "The Reality of the Situation"

Post date: Jul 23, 2012 3:53:15 PM

Featuring:

Chris – Erick’s boyfriend

Eugene – Erick’s neighbor friend

“Come in. The door’s open,” Eugene says in response to some rather insistent knocking.

Erick storms into Eugene’s apartment, slams the door, stands silently with his hands on his hips and stares intently at the back of Eugene’s head.

“How are your legs from that last workout?” Eugene asks without diverting his attention from the new LCD flat screen he recently purchased and had mounted onto the wall facing the door.

Erick takes notice of the Law & Order: Special Victims Unit marathon Eugene is watching and clears his throat.

Eugene turns around. “How can you possibly make a face like that with Christopher Meloni on screen?” he asks with a goofy grin.

Erick flares his nostrils.

*************************

A few weeks ago, Erick and Eugene had gone on one of their regular hikes.

Let’s back up.

A couple months ago, Erick agreed to let Eugene use him as a guinea pig for his new personal training business.

Let’s back up further.

Several years ago, Erick and Eugene met online.

Too far back.

A few months ago, Eugene was certified as a personal trainer.

That’s better.

A few months ago, Eugene was certified as a personal trainer. Knowing Erick’s dissatisfaction with his body, Eugene asked if Erick would serve as one of his personal training guinea pigs. Erick naturally (for him) took offense, so the matter was dropped.

But after some harsh words from Chris’s ex-boyfriend during his tenuous visit a couple months ago, Erick decided to start training with Eugene. Neither Erick nor Chris thought much of this. After all, the three of them were friends – and on a few occasions very good friends.

*************************

Erick begins pacing back and forth. Eugene turns around and kneels against the back of the couch. He starts to speak but no words come out of his mouth.

“I just got the third degree from Chris about you and me,” Erick begins. “Why is that?”

On a recent hike, Eugene had asked Erick if there was a possibility of a relationship between the two of them.

“Well…I may have mentioned our hike to him.”

“May have?”

“May have…did.”

“Why?”

“I wanted an answer.”

“Fine. The answer is ‘no’,” Erick declares as he starts to leave.

“I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t have to.” Erick retorts as he opens the door.

“I know, but what took you so long to respond in the first place?”

Erick closes the door. “I don’t know.”

Eugene stands up and slowly approaches Erick. “I find it very interesting that it took me talking to Chris and Chris confronting you to finally get a response.”

Erick turns around. “What do you want from me?”

Eugene backs Erick against the door. “I want you to acknowledge what’s obviously between us.”

Erick holds Eugene’s gaze for a few moments. “In a few seconds, it’s going to be this door.”

“Fair enough,” Eugene concedes, taking a few steps back.

“But before I go, what did Chris say when you told him?”

“He said, and I quote, ‘If he wants you, he can have you.’”

******************************

Erick storms into his apartment, slams the door, stands silently with his hands on his hips and stares intently at Chris sitting on the couch. “’If he wants you, he can have you?’”

Chris turns the television set off. Ironically, he was watching the same Law & Order: Special Victims Unit marathon as Eugene. “Sounds familiar,” he replies.

“Were you serious?”

“About what I said to Eugene?”

“Yes.”

“Yes. I meant it.”

“Why?”

“For the same reason you had no immediate answer for him…and for the same reason that was the first time I heard about it."

Erick’s face softens. He walks over and sits down next to Chris on the couch.

“What was there to consider?” Chris asks.

“Nothing.”

“Then why didn’t you just say ‘no’?”

“I didn’t say ‘yes’ either.”

“Either way, you weren’t definitive.”

Erick looks down at a spot on his couch that he hadn’t noticed before. “You’re right. I wasn’t. And I should have been.”

“So why weren’t you?”

Erick rests his head on the back of the couch. “Eugene is just so…intriguing. There’s just something exciting about him. I liked the fantasy he represents. Not giving him an answer extended it. But it was nothing I could seriously consider.”

“So you want excitement?” Chris asks as he gets up off the couch and walks toward the door. “Let’s have some excitement.”

Chris opens the door and walks out. He returns a few minutes later with Eugene in tow. “Eugene, since you’re so exciting and Erick wants more excitement in our relationship, then we should have some excitement.”

“What do you have in mind?” Eugene asks enthusiastically.

“Well, I know you want to be with Erick, but that’s not going to happen -- at least not without me. He and I are a package deal. I love him, he loves me and anything you do with him you also do with me.”

“I’m fine with that,” Eugene responds.

Erick looks at Eugene in mild disgust.

Chris continues. “So I propose that we just be a triple. We’ve already had a few threesomes so we may as well just make it official. Wouldn’t that be exciting, Erick?”

Eugene nods his head in agreement. “I’m game.”

Erick looks up at Chris and his eyes start to well up. “Eugene, go home,” Erick says quietly.

“Well, maybe some other time,” Eugene says as he turns around and walks out.

“Eugene,” Erick calls out. “No other time.”

Slightly disappointed, Eugene nods in concession. “Will you still be my guinea pig?”

Erick looks at Chris again.

Chris turns around and stares at Eugene for a moment. “Sure. Erick’s been looking really good lately.”

Erick walks up behind Chris and gives him a hug. “You’ve noticed?”

“Of course I’ve noticed.”

“But you haven’t said anything.”

Chris pats his stomach, which has grown more convex in recent weeks. “Acknowledging what’s going on with your body also meant acknowledging what’s going on with mine.”

A wistful smile creeps across Eugene’s face. “Then I’ll see you Wednesday,” he says as he walks out the door.

“I’m sorry, Chris,” Erick says.

Chris turns around, his arms pinned to his side by Erick’s hug. He smiles and kisses Erick on the top of the head. Erick looks up and smiles.

“I’m sorry too…” Chris replies. “…for getting you banned from that museum.”

“And for the general animosity – however justified?” Erick asks.

Chris takes Erick by the head and kisses him on the lips. “Yes. Now how about I show you some of that excitement I was talking about?” he asks.

“Absolutely,” Erick responds with a wide smile. “Because we have to start getting you back into shape.”