NAME
Mary Priestley
BORN:
5 Feb 1927
MARRIED:
James Louis Stowers
19 Dec 1953
DIED:
16 Nov 2004
This chapter is dedicated to Mary Priestley (b.1927); granddaughter of William and Kate, and daughter of Rangi. It has been very much a team effort by Mary’s children and their spouses, but in particular Rachael & Ian and Vincent & Helen. Other treasured memories have been shared by Maria, Louis and Michael. Much of the rest was gleaned from the remainder of their siblings and extended family through visits and phone calls.
These recollections of their mother pay tribute to her wonderful sense of love and purpose she had for her immediate and extended family. It is a rather long and detailed chapter, so give yourself some time and enjoy the life and times of mother and grandmother Mary Stowers (nee Priestley).
Any corrections, additional information, pictures or stories relevant to this chapter can be submitted via the contacts in the footer section of this page. Accreditation is given, where applicable. Many thanks to all those who have contributed.
Mary Priestley; the only child born to Rangi Priestley and Tanatiu (Don) Rangiuia (1905-1958) was born in Gisborne on Saturday 5 February 1927. Rangi and Don were engaged for a time but soon after Mary’s birth they had broken up due to the Rangiuia family having other plans for their son. Don was to marry Polly Carroll, (adopted daughter of Sir James Carroll and Heni Materoa) in a marriage arranged for them by their parents.
Father Don Rangiuia b.1905
Mary b.1927
Mother Rangi Priestley b.1908
Rangi's parents, William Augustine and Kate were understandably very concerned for their daughter and new granddaughter after the separation between Rangi and Don. They wanted to talk with their daughter to ensure what was best for both her and Mary. These discussions would have been emotional and distressing for both parents and daughter. Rangi's break-up with Don was hard on her and she didn't want to lose Mary as well. It was however decided, that Mary be brought up by her grandparents and live at 47 Cochrane Street, Gisborne.
Childhood
William Augustine and Kate spoke fluent Maori but they wanted the best for their grandchildren and thought they would have more opportunities if they only spoke English. At the time Mary was going to school they were justified in their view as their grandchildren, like their own children were punished for speaking Maori at school. William Augustine and Kate were disappointed they could not pass their Maori language to their grandchildren but they saw it as a necessity for the betterment of the family.
Mary referred to her Grandparents as 'Mum and Dad'. They provided her with a good home that she could thrive in, surrounded by family. She had a stubborn, mischievous nature which exasperated and amused her Grandparents in equal measure. William Augustine was an affectionate grandfather and it was his nature to allow grand children a little more leeway than Kate. That said, both William Augustine and Kate were caring grandparents who did everything they could to provide well for Mary and all their grandchildren.
Mary often spoke to her children, with great affection, about William Augustine and Kate. She told them William Augustine had the softest voice, spoke the most beautiful English and had exquisite handwriting. And whenever her beloved Uncle Hugh Robinson (married to Amelia Robinson nee Priestley) came to visit she would sit with him for hours and listen to him play the piano. He was always very happy to play whatever tunes she requested and also taught her a lot of the tunes she played into her adulthood, including Chopsticks.
Grandparents William and Kate
Mary’s childhood, by her own account and others in the family, was a happy one. During her upbringing there were a lot of family who called into Cochrane Street for a visit or a stay. If you were very lucky they would bring crayfish and other tasty sea food. Mary had time with mother Rangi whenever she visited Cochrane Street. When time would allow, Kate would also take Mary by horse and buggy up the coast to Tolaga Bay to visit her father Don.
Like most Priestley's Mary attended Te Hapara Primary School and later Gisborne Girls High. She enjoyed her schooling years, especially Basketball (now known as Netball) and Tennis. During these years she developed a love for reading and always had her nose buried in a book.
Back Ida, Lois, Rata. In Bucket is Bill and Mary
The seamstress, knitting, tatting and crocheting skills Mary learnt from Kate were of great value and put to good use when she became a mother. In later years she often spoke about the day she rode into Gisborne on the bus with Kate. A little girl in a knitted dress that had a peacock and fan on its front had caught Kate's eye. Mary watched Kate, deep in concentration, her head bobbing up and down, her eyes moving left to right. Mary had seen Kate do this many many times before and knew exactly what she was doing. She was counting stitches. By the time they arrived in Gisborne Kate already had the dress pattern memorised and made her way straight to the wool shop. Weeks later Mary, Ida and Rata had peacock and fan dresses identical to the dress of the girl on the bus. Kate did similar things when she sewed. She’d see a dress, a shirt or trousers someone in the family would benefit from and then go home and cut up a newspaper to create the pattern, then pin the fabric to it, ready for sewing. Mary always said that, at the time she never appreciated the wonder of her Grandmother's talent until after she had died. Mary regretted she never mastered Kate's talent for making something from nothing.
There was one thing about Kate that used to annoy Mary no end. Ironically it was the very thing that Mary adored about her long after Kate had passed. Kate only learnt to read English later in life. She knew the importance of it so when she was raising her own children and later Mary she thought it high time she learnt. There came a day when Kate picked up a comic Mary used to buy every week. It was The Adventures of the Phantom and Mary would rush down to the shop to get it the moment it came out. But soon after Kate picked up the first comic she too was hooked on The Adventures of the Phantom. From that point on Mary had to give the comic to Kate to read first. She hated waiting especially since Kate had to read the comic aloud, very slowly and point to each word as she read it. She also pronounced “Phantom” as “Pantom” which would annoy Mary as well. When Mary would tell of this time to her children she would speak with wonder that Kate whose life was already full of so many achievements could still learn new things all the way to the end of her life.
Kate was very community minded, she would always welcome to their home the school friends of Mary and her other grand children. She took care of any clothing repairs they needed and made sure they were returned to their own homes clean and fed.
The large Priestley home and family required a lot of time and guidance from William Augustine and Kate. They maintained a home where everyone contributed. They delegated household chores, recycled, encouraged education and duty to others. As a result the family knew their responsibilities and the home ran well. Everybody was expected to help. Flour sacks were made into bloomers, clothes were sewn, recycled or knitted by Kate. All the kids were given chores and often told to pee under the lemon tree. Schoolwork was done well. Elders were respected.
Grandparents and adoptive parents, William and Kate
47 Cochrane Street
Many years later in 2000 a similar scenario would play out when Mary discovered Harry Potter. Daughter Rachael had heard about Harry Potter when the fourth book; Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire was published. Rachael thought it sounded like a good story so she marched down to the Warehouse and got the fourth book as well as the previous three: Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. From page one of the first book Rachael was hooked and unfortunately so was Mary. She had picked up book one when Rachael had made the mistake of leaving it on her bed and going to work. From that point on Mary ensured Rachael did an honest days work by removing the distraction of Harry potter from her work day. This left Mary free to read Harry Potter at her leisure during the day. Half way through the third book Rachael who had grown frustrated with the morning bag check routine considered buying her mum her own copies. Today Rachael is very happy she didn't do this because the books that Mary read are still here today. Mary was only here long enough to read up to 'Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix' and long enough to see the movies up to Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.
Mary often spoke of the pride Kate had in the achievements of her children and grandchildren. She loved that her family had done so well in their lives. But she never lost the instinct of a Mother and when she saw disrespect in her children and grandchildren she would stamp it out as quickly as it appeared. One incident Mary recalled was a time when her Uncle Harry came to visit. When Mary’s Uncle voiced his impatience to Kate at the little formal education she had received. Kate replied. 'I may not know the things you know Harry but I knew enough to ensure you got the education you deserved.' With a skill only a nurturing Mother could summon Kate had made her point with an eloquence her granddaughter Mary still spoke of, years after her passing.
Often, we don’t appreciate the true value of what we have until it is no longer there and this is certainly true of Mary when she reminisced back through her childhood to her time with her beloved Grandparents. Key moments from Mary’s childhood stayed with her to the end of her life and she would take every opportunity to tell her children of these moments so they too could know how wonderful her childhood was because of the Grandparents who raised her.
(B) Lois, William A, Doris, Ani, Rachael
(F) Ida, David, John, Peter, Mary
Some of the childhood lessons Mary had to learn were learnt only with the greatest reluctance. But as with the life lessons that were welcomed by Mary these lessons too had a lasting impact on her. Granny Tuki was a very old Maori woman who Kate knew very well. It was Kate’s wish that Mary and the rest of the grandchildren respected this elderly lady. Whenever Granny Tuki needed something in town Mary, Rata and Ida were often tasked with accompanying her and ensuring she got what she needed. On one occasion Granny Tuki needed a pair of boots for the garden and so the girls had to take her. As soon as they entered the shoe shop the girls tried to steer Granny Tuki to the women’s section but Granny Tuki instead made a beeline for the men’s section where she promptly chose a pair of men’s hobnail boots. When Mary was to relay this story to her children years later she spoke of her embarrassment that Granny Tuki wanted a pair of men‘s boots. She was also worried she’d run into her school friends and they'd see her Granny Tuki smoking bad smelling tobacco from her pipe. When Mary spoke of her embarrassment to Kate she was told that Granny Tuki had helped many people over her long life and it was respect she deserved from Mary, not embarrassment. Kate dispatched this lesson to her grand daughter with the same eloquence and wisdom she used to dispatch the need for respect to her own son Harry.
When Mary was very young she used to have the occasional bad dream. She would speak of these dreams as omens and soon after having them people around her seemed to fall ill or die. One can debate the truth of these dreams but they were very real to the young Mary who saw them as premonitions about the people she knew and loved. Mary was always very shaken after having one of these dreams but Kate always seemed to sense when she had had one of them. She would sit with Mary until her grand daughter was calm again and then ask her to speak about what she saw. After one extremely upsetting dream Kate said to Mary. 'You will only have one more of these dreams and then I will take them with me so they do not come and upset you again.' Mary did indeed have one more of these dreams, the dream that told her Kate would be leaving them all soon. Kate was true to her word. After she passed, Mary was never plagued by these dreams again.
Front Row L-R Kate, Mary, Great Aunty Dine, Dawn, Rata, Peter Scott, Ida, ?, Great Aunty Sally, Joan Robinson. Back Row L-R Lois, Marie,?, Douglas Robinson, Charlie, William Augustine.
William Augustine and Kate raised six of their grand children including Mary. Shirley Priestley (1921-2010), Lois Priestley (1924-1998), Rata Priestley (1928-2002) all from Wi Kepa (1896-1969), Doris Priestley (1924-1992) from James Patterson (Pat) (1900-1973), and Ida Priestley (1924-2008) from Sarah Harriet (Sally) (1904-1982), all grew up at Cochrane Street with Mary.
There came a day when Mary and Rata and possibly Ida thought it a good idea to go to the race track, where William Augustine worked, and climb on top of the Grandstand. It was while they were walking along the edge of the guttering with their arms outstretched, singing and laughing that William Augustine rounded the corner. He looked up in horror to see his grand daughters at least two storeys above his head with nothing to stop them from falling to the ground below. To his credit he kept calm and said. 'Come on down girls, lunch is ready at the house.' The girls quickly got down from the Grandstand and ran over to him where they were promptly given a swift telling off and a paddy whack to their bottoms. Mary immediately burst into tears, not because the paddy whack hurt. It didn't hurt at all. It was more the fact that William Augustine had actually smacked her in the first place.
Two stories which were usually brought out when Mary, Ida and Rata managed a catch-up involved the only times Mary was smacked by William Augustine. It was known by many in the family William Augustine very rarely used smacking to discipline his children or grand children, choosing instead to use firm words and stern looks.
When the three cousins were married, and raising their own children, they would still try to squeeze as many visits in as they could. During these much loved times the childhood stories would be re-lived along with laughter, love and good-natured finger pointing. It was always with great affection that Mary referred to Ida as being the best behaved of the three of them whereas she and Rata were the ratbags. With that lovely laugh she had Ida would downplay her goodness but it was generally agreed between Rata and Mary, quite proudly in fact, that they were definitely the ratbags. Teasing comments would also be thrown into the mix as well with Mary and Rata trading the most hilarious insults. A typical exchange between the two would be played out many times over the years. 'You're the youngest out of all of us Rata. Why do you have the most wrinkles? (usually said while Mary was rubbing her nice smooth face.)' '....still the best looking though, you old bag.' Would be Rata's reply.
But it was Ida and Rata she formed an especially close bond with and throughout their entire lives they considered themselves to be sisters rather than cousins.
The childhood of these three cousins was often marked by much high jinks and mischief. Their' up to no good' antics were usually initiated by Mary or Rata. It was only Ida's loyalty to her cousins that saw her involved at all in any of these little schemes that were cooked up, and only after stopping them had failed. She usually managed to keep her nose out of trouble but never because she dobbed her cousins in.
Rata, Ida and Mary
One rare occasion of Mary and Rata mayhem which did escape Kate's notice came one warm Sunday when Mary, Rata and Ida were returning home from Sunday school. Kate had sent them in their best Sunday dresses and on their way home the girls decided to go to the creek. Mary thought it a good idea to grab the branches of a weeping willow tree and swing out over the water. She did it a few times then Rata called from the bank to have her turn as well. They alternated turns for a while; both shouting and laughing as they swung back and forth. Ida wisely chose to stay on the bank watching her cousins and laughing along with them. Then Mary hit on an idea. 'Why don’t we go together?!' She shouted to Rata. Rata thought it was a brilliant idea so together they grabbed some branches and swung out over the water. They flew through the air back and forth until the weeping willow gave up the ghost and down they both went all the way to the bottom of the muddy creek. Soaked from head to toe with a whole heap of broken branches floating around them Mary and Rata knew they were in big trouble. They waded out of the creek and hightailed it over to the race track to clean up. One can easily imagine the two little monkeys being followed by their older and much smarter cousin, laughing loudly because there was nothing wrong with her Sunday School dress.
The other time William Augustine smacked Mary was because of the hilarious Rata. There came a morning when Mary and Rata were walking through the race course on their way to school when their Grandfather approached them carrying a lamb. William Augustine was busy on this particular morning, which may account for his uncharacteristic impatience with his granddaughter. He gave the lamb to Mary telling her to return it to their backyard and be sure to lock the gate. Rata was standing behind Mary and humming 'Mary had a little lamb' softly under her breath. William Augustine couldn’t hear her but Mary definitely could and she promptly turned her chin up and stubbornly told him. 'No! I’m not taking the lamb!' William Augustine responded with a quick smack on the bottom and a stern. 'You get home now and you take this lamb with you!!' So Mary took the lamb home, her face full of thunder as Rata continued to hum 'Mary had a little lamb.'
It is fair to say the mischief Mary and Rata got up to challenged and tested William Augustine and Kate. Many in the family knew the few things that escaped Kate’s eagle eye did not escape William Augustine's notice so as Parents and Grandparents they would have made a formidable team when it came to mischief and fib spotting.
Rata and Mary
Mary didn’t limit her shenanigans to just her Grandparents and the Nightman. The rest of the Priestley’s got a taste as well. Shortly after Mary’s Uncle Harry (Harry Jones Priestley 1902-1961) got married in 1936 he brought his new bride Effie to Cochrane Street to stay. Mary thought it a good idea to apple pie their bed. Kate should have known better but at the time she thought Mary was being a good girl to make her Uncle's bed without being asked. Mary used just one sheet on the bed, folded it in half so they couldn’t get their feet all the way in and filled it with confetti. She thought it would make a hilarious wedding prank but her Uncle Harry did not. He growled the 9 year old Mary and told her she was a young lady now and too old to behave like this. She wasn’t too keen on her Uncle Harry after that lot. In years to come Uncle Harry would try to encourage Mary to become a school teacher but Mary, who wanted to buy a Lolly shop when she left school was adamant she was not going to do what her Uncle Harry wanted.
When all evidence of mischief was washed away Mary and Rata headed for home where they hung their now perfectly clean Sunday School dresses on the line, undetected by Kate. They climbed into their bedroom window to change then went into the kitchen and told a very surprised and pleased Kate that she didn’t need to wash their dresses that week. Later that night when William Augustine returned from the race track Kate told him how good Mary and Rata had been to clean their own Sunday School dresses. With a twinkle in his eye and laughing he said to her. 'I wondered what they were doing at the race track with their dresses covered in mud. How clever of them to get it all out.'
One Christmas William Augustine invited the Nightman to Cochrane Street for a drink to thank him for taking care of the outhouse waste every week. He agreed and so proceeded a night of a few drinks and good conversation. Part way through the evening the Nightman asked William Augustine where the two girls were. Surprised by the question William Augustine asked him which girls he was referring to. The Nightman replied. 'The girls who stay up late waiting for me to come passed their bedroom window so they can hold their noses and say 'Poo!!!' The next morning Mary and Rata were in trouble…again.
The loss of Mother Rangi and her Grandparents
Mary loved reading her entire life. Growing up, Rachael remembers her Mum's Mills and Boon, Catherine Cookson, Barbara Cartland and Wilber Smith books all over the house. When Mary reached her 50's she needed to wear reading glasses which took away a lot of her reading pleasure. Reading in the bath was a favourite reading spot for Mary but after she needed glasses the hot water would always steam them up. It is fair to say the hot water was the only thing steaming her glasses up because it is difficult to imagine Barbara Cartland steaming anything up.
In July 2016 several of the Priestley descendants, including our beloved family historian Bill Paku were lucky enough to be shown through 47 Cochrane Street by the current owners. The importance of being given this special opportunity was not lost on any of them. And the added bonus of enjoying it with Uncle Bill by their sides made it so much more important. Bill spoke animatedly and with much emotion and awe as he allowed his memories to flow with the love and humour only he can harness.
One memory Bill shared at this time concerned Mary's love of reading. Mary's youngest child Rachael and her partner Ian were walking up the drive of Cochrane Street after the walk through and Bill called out from the front porch in his hilariously deadpan voice. 'Hey Rachael did you know your Mum was almost shot on this porch?....gave her a hell of a fright it did!' And so ensued the following tale; one warm afternoon, Mary was reading on the front porch, one of her favourite spots and had fallen asleep. Meanwhile the neighbour across the road was cleaning his rifle. Not knowing it was loaded he inadvertently let a round off and the bullet went flying across the road where it smashed the front porch window and embedded itself in the wall near the front door. Bill went on to laughingly say. 'If you thought that bullet went fast it had nothing on Granny Kate's speed when she flew out of the house to give the neighbour an earful!'
Aunt Kitty, Mary and friend Una
Rata, Mary
and cousin Bill Paku
On the evening of Thursday 9 March 1933 Mary's Mum Rangi died. Mary had just turned six. Her younger sister Dawn was three and a half. Despite Rangi's unexpected passing the Priestley family gathered strength from each other and extended to Rangi and her two daughters all their care and love.
Fairly quickly after Rangi died William Augustine and Kate legally adopted Mary. Kate was behind this. She didn't want any of her grand children taken away from her or the family and with Rangi gone she felt especially vulnerable to losing Mary. Mary, quite comically made it clear to her own children, 'I may have been the only grand child legally adopted but that didn't mean they loved me best. Mum still smacked my bum and never let me get away with anything!'
Bill Paku, remembers that Harry wanted to adopt Mary as well. Mary, with a stubborn streak that showed itself often throughout her long life wasn't keen on this idea. She thought her uncle Harry was too strict and wouldn't have a bar of it.
On 19 December 1937 Mary and the entire Priestley family were rocked by another unexpected death when their beloved William Augustine passed away quietly on that Sunday evening. Mary was just two months shy of her 11th birthday and old enough to feel the full impact of this loss. In later years she would speak openly of what it cost her to have to say goodbye to her most precious Dad and Grandfather. He was in her life just long enough to shape her into the woman she was to become but not nearly long enough for Mary. The burden of losing him was one she would carry with her to the end of her life.
Mary and most her cousins at the time of Williams death in 1937
On Saturday 24 March 1945, Kate, the matriarch of the Priestley family died suddenly of a stroke. Word was sent to Mary and she returned to Gisborne heartbroken. Mary's daughter Rachael remembers the stories of Kate's funeral that her Mum passed down to her. 'Mum spoke openly of Kate's passing. She took the loss very hard. She did not know the people from Rongowhakaata and did not feel comfortable with them having such a strong presence during Kates funeral. Years later she saw the bond and respect between Kate and Rongowhakaata and came to appreciate and respect their involvement in the funeral.'
Kate Headstone
William and Rangi Headstone
By late 1947 20 year old Mary was back in Auckland. She may have moved with Mona Gribble but it was her old school friend Una Porter who she spoke of the most at this time. She secured work in the sewing industry, in the suburb of Avondale for Holeproof or Jean Apparel. The friends worked hard during these years and looked out for each other in the big smoke that was Auckland. Mary also kept in close contact with her Priestley family, especially Ida and Rata.
Earliest years in Auckland
Three of the more important people in Mary's young life were buried together in the Te Arai Cemetery, Manutuke, Gisborne.
Information about Mary's post school years is a little sketchy at best but Bill Paku remembers that she had a couple of jobs soon after she left school. The first one was at the McKenzies store and later she found a job sewing. He goes on to say Mary moved away from Gisborne around 1947 and moved to Auckland with her best friend Mona Gribble. It may be that Mary moved away from Gisborne a couple of times. Some of her children remember stories Mary told them about leaving Gisborne before Kate died in 1945 to pick tobacco in the South Island (Motueka or Nelson) with her school friend Una Porter (1924-2006).
Marriage to James Stowers
Not too long after Mary met Isa and Lucille she also met their older brother James Louis Stowers (1928-2007). James and Mary first met at The Orange Hall. At the time of this first meeting " Among my Souvenirs by Connie Francis" was playing. Despite the different cultures and upbringings Mary soon learnt she had a lot in common with James. They both had excellent work ethics, a fierce loyalty to family and a keen desire to raise a large family of their own. They had also both lost their Mothers at a young age. Love soon blossomed and Mary realised James was the man she wanted to marry. The Orange Hall had worked its magic again and soon there would be another generation of Stowers who have this famous place to thank for their existence.
On Saturday 19 December 1953 at Sacred Heart Parish, Ponsonby Auckland Mary and James married. Mary had converted to Catholicism at James' request. James had asked Gerrard (Gerry) Malone, the husband of his cousin Mary Patricia (Mopi) Malone nee Stowers (1920-2004) to be his Best Man and Mary had asked Lucille her good friend and soon to be sister-in-law to be her Bridesmaid. The man who gave Mary away was a gentleman called Bob. The bride, with her beautiful wedding bouquet of Christmas lilies looked lovely on her special day.
The Orange Hall, located on Newton Road in the heart of Auckland was a very popular place to meet and socialise amongst this new and young Auckland population. There was live music to listen and dance to and Mary, Isa and Lucille spent a lot of their Saturday nights there. Owned by the Protestant Orange Society, the Orange Hall enforced the strictest rules in Auckland. There was no chewing gum sold, no jitterbugging, no passes were given to leave the venue and no alcohol served. Despite the best efforts of the Orange Hall to enforce a strict moral code, constant rebellions from the young patrons made this difficult for them.
By the 1950s Mary was still living and thriving in Auckland. She had also formed very close friendships with two of her work colleagues, friendships that would see Mary through to the end of her life. Louisa (Isa) Vlemmix nee Stowers (1929-2018) and Lucille Skelton nee Stowers (1932-2016) were sisters who had moved to New Zealand from the families plantation at Aleisa, Samoa. At the time Mary met the Stowers girls they were living at the Stowers homestead at 282 Jervois Road, Herne Bay with their older siblings. This house was purchased for the Stowers siblings by their Father S'ua Pa'ia Joseph Stowers (1890-1973). When the siblings were settled and in good jobs they took over the payments.
Auckland in the 1950s was an exciting place for Mary to be. World War Two was becoming a distant memory and people were learning to be happy again, free from the hardship and worry of war. In Europe people, keen to move away from the horrific memories and losses the war left them with were emigrating to, amongst other countries, the US, Australia and New Zealand. So Mary's new home of Auckland also became the new home for a lot of Dutch and English as well.
Mary, Mavis, Lucille and Isa
Una and Mary
Mary also spoke of an incident with her father-in-law S'ua Pa'ia Joseph Stowers that occurred during the wedding reception at the Stowers Homestead. Joseph was over from Samoa, Mary saw him going down the gift table taking some of her wedding gifts for himself. Nobody was stopping this so she approached him and said, 'Those don't belong to you. Put them back.' Joseph returned the gifts to the table but this would prove a key moment in the relationship Mary and her father-in-law would share. Both Mary and Joseph were a product of their culture and upbringing. This meant there would be several more clashes between them in the years ahead.
After their wedding day Mr. and Mrs. Stowers honeymooned in Rotorua. They returned to Auckland where they settled at the Stowers Homestead. This was a happy time for the young couple as they became Parents for the first time. They welcomed a healthy Maria Joy Stowers on Wednesday 21 July 1954 at Auckland Hospital.
The invaluable knowledge and guidance Mary received from William Augustine and Kate would have served her well as a young mother. In years to come Mary also ensured the lessons she received from her grand parents were passed down to her children.
It was a shame her stunning wedding dress was only rented. The groom, with his gorgeous dimples and smile looked very handsome in his double breasted, pin striped suit.
In later years when Mary spoke of her wedding day she spoke wistfully of feeling William Augustine at her side walking her up the aisle. Only when she felt his presence did she remember that her wedding day marked the 16th anniversary of his passing. She felt very happy to sense his presence.
James and Mary cutting the cake
According to Mary's comical account after Maria was born James arrived at the hospital for his first visit carrying a lovely bouquet of flowers.
Or at least they would have been lovely if he hadn't shoved them under his arm for the walk up to the Maternity Ward. James, being a more practical man than he was a romantic one was, according to Mary, a bit embarrassed to be seen with flowers and tried to hide them under his arm. So when he presented them to Mary she just got an assortment of squashed flower heads and stalks. Of course, James had a completely different version of events in which all flowers were lovingly delivered perfectly intact.
Sister in law Lucille Stowers, husband James Louis Stowers,
Mary and father in law, Sua Paia Joseph Stowers.
Louis b.1955 and Maria b.1954
Louis Edward Stowers followed his older sister on 19 December 1955, providing his Parents with a wonderful second wedding anniversary gift. His birth also marked the 18th anniversary of the passing of his Great Grandfather, William Augustine. Louis was the last child born to Mary and James in Auckland. The rest of the Stowers brood would be born in the King Country after Mary and James moved out of the Stowers Homestead and struck out on their own.
Move to the King Country
Mary and James moved their young family of four to the King Country sometime in 1957 settling in Waitaanga first where James worked for the forestry. Oldest son Louis remembers James worked for Henderson and Pollard while the family were still in Auckland and managed to get a transfer to Waitaanga.
Mary and James were very strong in their views but their influence on each other and ability to compromise showed they could each change their ways for the good of the family. Mary was never going to be a typical Samoan wife. But she tried hard to provide the food that James had grown up with. The chop suey, raw fish and taro she mastered exceptionally well if truth be told but still, she had to put up with 'My sisters can do it better.' from James. To their credit household duties were shared. Family budgeting was handled by Mary and James did his share of cooking, dishes and nappy changing.
The home Mary and James raised their children in was very different to the homes they grew up in. Cochrane Street, Gisborne was a world away from Joseph Stowers plantation in Aleisa, Samoa. Elements of both would form the foundation for the home Mary would build with James.
During the King Country years Mary and James continued to add to their family. Michael Joseph arrived on Thursday 31 July 1958 at Taumarunui Hospital where the rest of his siblings would also be born. By now Mary, much like Kate before her was taking childbirth in her stride. Michael was welcomed by his Parents with the same love and fanfare given his older brother and sister. Mary was relieved her second son arrived safely and he had all his fingers and toes. And James was just happy he had another healthy son. The family moved to Tatu shortly after Michael was born.
Mary proved a doting mother and James a firm father. They both put their children first and did all they could to ensure they were provided for. Mary stayed home when the family was very young, running the house and looking after her Stowers brood. Occasionally she took on paid work, like her job in the Ohura Miners Hostel when the family moved there but it was James who provided most of the family income.
Michael b.1958
Mary and James' oldest child Maria was 5 when Peter was born. It wasn't too long after Peter's birth that Maria needed to go into hospital for corrective surgery on a hernia. It would prove a very worrying time for Mary so it was with great relief that Maria came through her surgery well and Mary could have her back home quickly.
Daughter Julia Agnes Stowers
On 27 March 1961 Mary and James next child was welcomed into the world, a second much loved daughter. Her birth was especially welcomed by Mary who, after having a run of boys could finally start making dresses again for another daughter. Julia was the last Stowers child born while the family still lived in Tatu. Mary let James name their little girl and he chose for her the names of his two beloved Mothers. On Monday 27 March 1961 Julia Agnes made her way into the
Peter Lloyd arrived in time to see the first day of a brand new decade with his Parents and siblings when he popped up on Friday 1 January 1960. Of all her children Mary would say her labour with Peter was the easiest. The appendicitis she had at the same time made her labour pain pale into insignificance. She did not even know her baby boy had arrived until the nurse put him in her arms. As Peter grew into his toddler years Mary would fuss over his gorgeous hair. It was so soft and curly she couldn't stand to cut it. So she didn't. She let it grow and it wasn't cut until Peter was almost at school.
In July 2016 when Mary and James' children Michael and Rachael (with Rachael's partner Ian and cousin Merv Priestley) made a trip to Gisborne they caught up with Gail Hughes, daughter of Ida Hughes nee Priestley and Graham Hughes. Everyone had a wonderful afternoon, going through old photographs, laughing and sharing stories about Mary and Ida. As they sifted through the photos they found pictures of Mary's oldest children, Maria, Louis, Michael and Peter (with his lovely curls) that Mary had sent to Ida. The other Stowers children had yet to make their appearance, hence their absence from this little exchange between the cousins. But it is not hard when reading between the lines to see the pride Mary had in all her children. Ida of course, reciprocated with photos and stories of her gorgeous Gail and Ronald who were doing cute and 'up to no good' things too, much like their Stowers cousins. It was lovely to see evidence of this exchange between two very loving Mothers and cousins, knowing there would have also been much boasting going on as well as little funny anecdotes. This exchange also speaks to Mary's need to maintain contact with her beloved cousin Ida. The bond that started as girls growing up at Cochrane Street was stronger than ever as they became Mothers.
Peter b.1960
Early Monday morning 19 June 1961 Mary prepared breakfast for James, packed his lunch before he caught the miners bus to work. Between the time James left for work and the time Maria and Louis got up for school Mary noticed something very wrong with Julia. She immediately called the miners office in Ohura and left a message for James to come home. She then sent Maria and Louis off to school on the bus. Before leaving for school Maria sensed the was a problem with her younger sister. After a frantic wait for James to get home it was quickly decided to pack Michael and Peter into the car and take Julia directly to Taumarunui Hospital. Mary was holding Julia in her arms in the front passenger seat. Mary looked down at Julia while James was trying to get them to the hospital. Just before she died Julia looked up at her Mum and smiled.
A very distraught James pulled over at the side of the road and gently took Julia from Mary. It was important to the deeply religious James that his daughter received the blessings of his faith. He prayed quietly over Julia before he moistened his thumb with saliva blessed her and did the sign of the cross on her forehead. Michael remembers the especially bleak drive back home from the hospital without Julia. Nobody was talking or making a sound and the rain outside was cold and heavy. The river road, Highway 43 began to flood, so James had to get out of the car several times to check that the water was shallow enough to get through safely.
When Maria and Louis returned from school they remember coming home to a crowded house. Bob Lochie, a family friend and neighbour took Maria and Louis into a room and told them the doctor had taken their sister away and she was not coming home again. To an almost seven year old Maria, these words gave her false hope. She was confused and upset by them and would have preferred the truth.
Mary and James dealt with their grief separately. Mary blamed herself, quietly bearing the guilt. Sometimes it overwhelmed her and other times she managed to set it aside, but it was always with her. There was little time to grieve the loss of Julia. There were others whose needs she had to put before her own.
When Julia died both the Stowers and Priestley families, as well as friends supported Mary and James in every way they could. Mary's Aunty Maraea Ward nee Priestley (Marie) (1915-2001) came through from Waverley with her husband Ted Ward (1917-1995) and took Maria and Louis away for a little break. During Maria and Louis stay the Wards took them on a day trip to Whanganui where Louis made friends with the big Dragon in the playground there. Mary was also sent comforting words from her younger sister Dawn.
In 1995 when Mary and daughter Rachael were driving back to Auckland from Ted Ward's funeral in Whanganui they decided to take a detour through Taumarunui and Ohura. Both Rachael and Mary were keen to get up to the Cemetery to visit Julia. The Ohura Cemetery is a lovely spot. The only company you have, besides your loved ones are the baaing sheep scattered across the surrounding hills.
On Sunday night 18 June 1961 Maria remembers she was allowed to hold Julia who was a very content and chirpy three month old baby. She was smiling, playful and trying to talk. Julia was becoming aware of her surroundings and beginning to recognise everybody. This was the first time the family had seen Julia like this.
Julia Antoinette Stowers nee Fruean (1900-1929) , who gave birth to him and who he lost so early in his life and Agnes Stowers nee Luamanuvae (1909-1961) who raised and loved him as her own.
Julia thrived in her first months of life. She loved listening to her Dad playing his guitar, yodelling and singing his Country and Western songs. She also enjoyed the playful attention she received from her curious siblings.
Julia whakapapa
(click to enlarge)
Ohura Cemetery
At Julia's grave Mary said, 'A mother should never have to say goodbye to any of her children.' Julia did not have a gravestone so Rachael asked her Mum if they should have an unveiling for her. Mary agreed it would be a good thing to do. The wheels were in motion.
Not long after Mary and Rachael got back to Auckland, Mary was on the phone to all her children in Australia (Maria and Shaz, Peter and Leigh) and Christchurch (Vincent and Helen). Michael was contacted as well. She was going to bring everyone home for Julia. The family pooled their resources to source a minister and organise a service and gravestone. At the time, there was still a Catholic church in Ohura where the Service was held. They also hired the Ohura town hall for the afternoon where a big lunch of Chop Suey was enjoyed by all. There was a slight hold up with lunch when it was discovered Mary's Chop Suey pot was forgotten back home in Auckland. Vincent saved the day by going next door and borrowing a big stock pot.
Julia's unveiling, in August 1995 proved an important time for Mary and her family. There was a lot of reminiscing and laughing going on and a real feeling of family. Maria and Shaz made it over. Louis and Michael were there. The absence of Peter and Leigh and their family of five was felt. Vincent and Helen brought their three boys up from Christchurch with them. John and Linda were there with their family of four. Patrick and Rachael as well. The entire Stowers family were happy to be back in Ohura rolling out old family memories, visiting favourite spots and cementing Julia's place in the family.
The final years in the King Country
Mary miscarried her first baby after Julia but on Tuesday 30 October 1962 Vincent James wasn't mucking around when he popped up to claim his place as Stowers number 6. Another baby for Mary and James to cherish who would carry the name of his father and his Uncle Vincent Protus Stowers (Sonny) (1924-1986). Vincent's first few months would have been an anxious time for his parents especially his Mum after the loss of Julia.
Shortly after Vincent was born the family was treated to a visit by the Priestley branch when some of Mary's uncles and aunties came to stay. Mary, who had been preserving fruit and vegetables her whole life was proud to show off and share her full larder with her Priestley family.
John Anthony followed on Friday 3 April 1964. Like his siblings before him John was a healthy mix of curiosity and mischief who loved listening to his Dad thump away in time to his guitar and cuddles, which Mary gave in plentiful supply.
On Monday 10 May 1965 Leon Patrick (Pat) was born. An unforeseen complication made itself known to the family shortly after Pat's birth. If this complication occurred today it would have been diagnosed as lactose intolerant and treated immediately, but in 1965 the diagnosis took many months to be made. These long months took Mary and James to hell and back. Their son would spend his first two years in hospital subjected to painful lumber punctures and other excruciating tests. He had a playful nature and cheeky smile that made him a hit with the nurses. They spoilt him and made sure his birthdays and Christmas' were happy occasions. The nurses spoilt Pat so much that when Mary and one of his older siblings came to visit him Pat was often running happily all over the hospital. James would sometimes visit his son but the train trips were expensive and he thought it better to work so Mary and one of the children could visit more frequently. Pat's illness baffled specialists in three hospitals; Taumarunui, Te Kuiti and Waikato. When the diagnosis was eventually made and a suitable treatment found for Pat he soon began to thrive.
After Pat's diagnosis was made and he returned home there began a hilarious battle of wills between his Parents. The battle concerned Pat's name. James preferred Leon, after a good friend of his from the coal mine, but Mary preferred Patrick after her favourite Uncle James Patterson Priestley (Pat) (1900-1973). This on going argument between his parents would not be resolved until Mary enrolled her youngest son at school with the name 'Patrick.' In 1973 when Mary's beloved Uncle Pat died she returned to Whangara to attend his funeral. It was only at that time that she discovered he was not 'Patrick' at all.
Julia Headstone
Vincent b.1962
John b.1964
Pat b.1965
Years later when Mary was speaking of this time to Rachael she said it would have been difficult for her to continue if she lost Pat like she lost Julia. She was not strong enough to lose two of her children. Mary looked at Rachael before changing the subject completely, and said 'Nobody else goes before me!' Her words would prove to be true.
On Tuesday 22 July 1969, one day after Maria's 15th birthday Rachael Magdalen came along. Mary liked the name 'Rachael' and James wanted to name her 'Magdalen' after his Dad's youngest sister Magdalena Grey nee Stowers (1894-1970).
Around June 1971, just before Maria's 17th birthday James and Maria moved to Auckland. They would both find jobs and James would find the family a home. They stayed with James' older brother Vincent at his Jervois Road house in Herne Bay. There were no forestry or coal mining jobs in Auckland so James fell back on his engineering back ground and found a fitter and turning job. Jerry Malone who was married to James' cousin Patricia was foreman at LJ, a clothing manufacturer for Christian Dior found a sewing job for Maria.
While James and Maria were in Auckland Mary and the rest of the family remained in Ohura. As time went by an increasingly worried Mary struggled to keep the family going. James sent as much money back to the family as he could but times were still tough. Mary and James kept in touch with letters and occasional phone calls. After only a few months of being away from the family an excited and proud James wrote to Mary with the good news that he had found a brand new 5 bedroom state house at Mangere. Despite the good news it would still be some months before the construction of the new house was complete. Mary and the children who had to say goodbye to many old friends were especially relieved when the long anxious wait was over and the family could finally move into the house.
James and his older brother Vincent drove down from Auckland to help move the family from their old home in Ohura to their new home in South Auckland. Vincent's 1957 four door Dodge Custom was a large car but it was still a tight squeeze to fit James and six children in for the journey to Auckland. The Miners Office in Ohura provided assistance and helped many coal miners' families to move and find new jobs around the north island. They also paid for Don Stewart, a local trucking contractor to transport the Stowers furniture to Auckland. The family departed Ohura for Auckland after the 1971 school year. Because of the limited space in Vincent's car Mary and Michael rode in the truck with Don Stewart to Auckland. James, Mary and the children received a warm welcome from the large extended Stowers family, when they arrived at 623 Massey Road Mangere. There were many Uncles, Aunties and cousins who the children were now meeting for the first time.
The house was not complete when the family moved in. There were no carpets or flooring and the yard was over grown. Bill Skelton married to James' younger sister Lucille would use his company discount to purchase carpets for the family.
The overgrown yard would be taken care of by James' young brother Joseph. Much to the amazement of the children he accomplished the task in a few hours using only a machete.
Vincent, who was nine when the family moved to Auckland, speaks of a fracturing within the family after the move. The Stowers children who had all attended school together were suddenly split into three different schools; Otahuhu College, Mangere East Intermediate and Jean Batten Primary School. Rachael would stay with James' younger sister Lucille Skelton nee Stowers and her family while her Parents' worked during the week then return for the weekends. Mary did not like having to separate her children in these ways but would have seen it as a necessary change. Vincent also speaks of the long hours both Mary and James had to work to keep the family going. Despite the long hours Mary worked she still managed to send her boys off to school with a packed lunch. The decision Mary had to make to split her children up cost her dearly, but she would make doubly sure her children continued down the right paths and that they took these changes in their stride.
The children were accustomed to following their older siblings. In Ohura you always had your siblings with you; eeling down at the creek, playing war games in a paddock somewhere and going off to school together. None of this could happen in Auckland. Attending different schools forced the children to cope with the new challenges alone without the support of an older sibling. The seeds of independence were laid and this would have a huge impact on the paths they would choose for the future.
Mary secured work, in the cafe (Sky Chef NAC), at Auckland International Airport (now the domestic terminal) where she maintained front of house and cash handling. She held this position for about 7 years, and during her time here, formed many friendships, including her friendship with Sissy Filapaina, the mother of Olsen, one of New Zealand's first successful league players in the 1970's. Several of the Stowers children; Maria, Louis and Michael got part time work with their mother at the airport as well.
With the departure of Maria in 1974 to start her world OE. Mary would begin to see in her children evidence of the seeds of independence taking root. Sons Louis, Michael and Peter joined the Army and served in different camps around the country.
This brought financial relief but emotional worry to Mary. The worry continued when Louis and Peter served in Singapore from 1979 to 1981. Michael left the army in 1981 and accepted a job in Brazil for Western Geophysical an oil exploration company. Vincent was also to join his older siblings when he departed for his OE to Europe in 1984. Rather than try to cure her children of the travel bug Mary, in later years would catch it herself.
In 1971 the Tatu State Coal Mine Ohura closed and a worried Mary and James had to make some hard decisions for their family. The Stowers family were not alone in their concerns for the future. There was a sense of apprehension that ran through the entire community. The Smith and Lochie families, close family friends also had to move eventually settling respectively in Huntly and the Auckland suburb, of Pt. Chevalier. It was decided, much to the horror of the Stowers children that the family would also have to move back to Auckland, though Wellington, Levin and the open cast coal mine in Huntly were also considered.
The return to Auckland
When Rachael had started school and was being especially stubborn and frustrating, Mary would threaten her with a name change to bring her back into line. 'If you don't stop, I'm going to take 'Rachael' away and give you my name instead. You'll be 'Mary Magdalen' and everyone at St Pius X will laugh at you!' Mary's experience as a loving Mum who could wrestle control back from her misbehaving children with a few well placed words and humour was, unfortunately for Rachael, well honed by the time she came along. Rachael wasn't exactly planned by her Parents and bringing her into the world was difficult for 42 year old Mary. Her doctor opted for a cesarean but infection soon set in and Mary and Rachael had to stay in hospital for a few weeks until Mary recovered.
Mary b.1927 and Rachael b.1969
Retirement
Prior to Mary's retirement, in 1985 she made her first overseas trip to Samoa with James and daughter Rachael. It was 2 weeks that Mary enjoyed immensely. It can be argued that this trip created in Mary a love of road tripping, but those that know and love her best, know that Mary had the road tripping addiction long before Samoa.
Mary had to leave the airport after suffering a heart attack. After a long recovery Mary managed to get another position at Union Carbide Batteries in Mt Wellington. Mary was allowed to take batteries home which she was happy to share with family and friends. This job that would take her through to her retirement in 1986. As a side line Mary would sell Tote tickets to make an extra bit of cash and to have some fun with her work mates and friends. During this time Mary also used her down time trying to solve the Rubik's Cube (several times she managed to do it) and she also enjoyed reading True Crime Detective magazines. Mary also enjoyed painting ceramics with sister in-law Terri Stowers (married to Sio Stowers 1935-2015 younger brother of James) and daughter Rachael. Her black panther and brown cookie bear biscuit jar survive to today. In later years Mary would discover she was related to Terri through her Rangiuia side.
Mary blossomed through her retirement years. She was free from the responsibility of raising her children and more than ready for the prospect of welcoming more grandchildren. She was already lucky enough to have Angela, Adam and Lisa but three grand children was not going to cut it. She wanted more and she was going to make sure all her children knew this. After much toe tapping and clicking of her tongue, Mary soon got more grandchildren to love. Kataraina, Robyn, Kura, Sam, Ben, Bobby, Max, Ian, James, Sean, Zane and Travis. She was also a Great Nan to Antony, Madison, Latavia, Linneya and Saesha.
When Mary retired, the long hours of work she sustained for many years were well behind her and she made the most of this time. Flights and road trips to extended family around Australia and the North and South Island were taken frequently. Priority, of course, was given to trips that would bring Mary closer to her precious grand children. Without hesitation, she would drop everything at a moments notice to attend christenings in Christchurch, sports days in Darwin and rose picking, with sister in law Isa, on the Gold Coast. This created no end of headaches for the children left in Mary's jet stream, who needed to contact her, and were forced to make phone calls to the entire extended Priestley and Stowers families.
Mary
James and Mary
By 1995, Mary and James had moved to 37 Gray Avenue where Mary formed a good friendship with her neighbour Wai. The two neighbours were both keen gardeners and the mothers of big families. They would laugh often from their front porches. From here they would exchange stories of their treasured grandchildren over their morning smoke and coffee. For Mary's 70th birthday Wai gifted her with a silk tree. Mary chose to plant it on the lawn between their houses so they could both enjoy it during their morning natter.
In 1996 Mary's dear cousin Peter Scott (1927-1996) lost his battle with prostate cancer. This was an especially sad loss for Mary who was very close to Peter. Much of their childhood was spent together at Cochrane Street and Mary had fond memories of this time.
Gray Avenue
Towards the end of 1991, after all of their children had flown the coop, Mary and James moved out of their 5 bedroom home at 623 Massey Road, a home they had raised their children in for 20 years. They moved to 35 Gray Avenue in Mangere East where Mary immediately put her stamp on the garden and soon Freesias, Violets and Roses flourished.
Mary spent her down time playing Solitaire on Michael's computer. Previously she had always played the card version of this game but now she was playing it in the new computer age. Mary also enjoyed music from various artists. Some of her favourites were Engelbert Humperdinck, Tom Jones, Connie Francis, John Rowles, Prince Tui Teka, Freddy Fender, Charlie Pride and Daphne Walker.
In 1993 Mary and James' son Michael purchased a block of flats in Dreifuss Place, Mangere East. The flats were owned by Betty Dickinson, a retired school teacher who was a couple of years older than Mary. Betty had Gisborne in common with Mary as both were born and raised there. The two would form a wonderful friendship filled with japes and capers that took them to West Auckland for mushrooming and mad dashes to the North Shore whenever Betty had a Nutrimetics delivery to make. Both of them were lifelong insomniacs so it was considered normal for the phone at 37 Gray Avenue to go off at 11.30pm. This would be the phone call to Mary that would send her running down the driveway to be picked up by Betty for Neighbourhood Watch duties. Both ladies loved to gossip and swap women's magazines, taking full advantage of all the puzzles, gossip and recipes. Mary's friendship with Betty provided her with much laughter and adventure as well as a great distraction between visits from her much cherished grandchildren. It was comforting for Mary in her twilight years to have found such a wonderful friendship that gave her independence and purpose.
Some of the family at Gray Ave
Final Years
Mary never much liked staying at home and twiddling her thumbs so her final years were spent taking trips to family across the Tasman and around New Zealand. Her home town of Gisborne was always a popular destination for Mary. A driver could easily be found amongst her eight children who each had driven Mary to Gisborne many times. When one of Mary's children came home they knew a road trip with their Mum was always going to happen. She would hint, in her subtle but cheeky way that she must visit so and so for some abstract reason. As far as she was concerned this more than justified any road trip. Mary enjoyed relatively good health during these years so made the most of this time to keep herself and her children busy, entertained and happy.
On Tuesday 19 March 2002 Mary received word that her beloved sister and cousin Rata had died in Rotorua. The first and the youngest of the three had fallen and Mary was devastated. She attended Rata's funeral and she and Ida along with the rest of the family consoled each other, laughed, cried and reminisced.
Mary, Rachael, Ida, Grahame
Rata and Mary
In December 2003, Mary's health began to deteriorate. For the next six months visits to her doctor and overnight stays in the hospital became the norm. By January 2004 Mary was fed up with all these hospital shenanigans. She decided that after 60 years of smoking, it was time to stop and gave up on the spot with no assistance from anybody or anything. Such was her stubborn determination to stay out of hospital.
In May 2004 Mary was diagnosed with terminal cancer. It was a cancer that had started in her gall bladder and by the time of diagnosis, had already spread to her liver. Mary and the family were advised that there was no treatment available. When Mary was given the news, she sat quietly for a moment deep in thought before turning to her daughter Rachael and saying 'Well a fat lot of good that did me. Can you go down and get me a packet of cigarettes?' It was an unexpected moment of humour that Mary could summon at will whenever needed. Rachael went down and got her mother a packet of cigarettes and Mary smoked happily until the end of her days.
Shortly after Mary's diagnosis Michael installed a spa bath for her to enjoy. This proved not to be as beneficial as it could have been. One incident that occurred on the very first night showed the consequences of what can happen if you don't listen to Michael. Rachael had come home from work to run Mary's bath and make sure she was OK. Michael had already left instructions with Mary on how to use the bath. He advised that the water level should be above the jets and only one cap of bubble bath was required. Mary passed these instructions onto Rachael who promptly ignored the bubble bath instruction when it appeared that the bubbles weren't coming up. Instead of the required capful Rachael used half the bottle. When the bath was ready Rachael settled Mary in, switched on the jets and left her to enjoy a relaxing soak. A few minutes later James and Rachael were sitting in the lounge when they heard a loud shriek from Mary. They both took off to the bathroom where Mary, with the exception of her madly waving arms was nowhere to be seen. The bubbles had risen above the bathroom window and when Rachael had finally managed to clear them away from her Mum, Mary uttered in her deadpan humorous way. 'You put in more than a capful, didn't you?'
When James passed in 2007 he wanted to be with Mary and Julia. The children had a Catholic service for him in Mangere then interred him in Ohura close to Julia, with half of Mary's ashes. A year after James passed, with the children living far and near it was decided unveilings for Mary and would be difficult to organise. Instead discussions were held and emails sent to organise a shared headstone in Ohura for Mary and James and a plaque for Mary in Gisborne. Permission was given by Bill Paku to inter Mary's ashes and install a plaque at Manutuke. Within Mary and James' children there was a feeling of relief that they had managed to fulfil the final wishes of their parents. The isolated location of Ohura has not limited visits to Mary, James and Julia by their family.
Mary's Legacy
Mary's legacy to her family can be seen first hand in this chapter. All her children contributed their time and their memories to ensure this was a fitting tribute to their mother. It was the importance she placed on cooperation as well as the ability to decide when to state your opinion and when to hold your peace. that made this chapter possible.
Mary never took a dominant approach in her children's lives but hoped the paths they chose for themselves would lead to happy futures. Within her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren she instilled empathy for others, a sense of fair play, a respect for and interest in family history. She also ensured her family had good work ethics and a loyalty to family. Other traits Mary displayed in her childhood namely her cheeky sense of humour and mischievous nature, that perhaps she did not mean to pass down were none the less inherited by her children.
1927 - 05 February born in Gisborne to Rangi Priestley and Don Rangiuia.
1928 - 09 December cousin Rata Priestley born (1 year old)
1929 - 18 August sister Dawn Robinson born (2 years old)
1931 - Napier earthquake.
1933 - 09 March Death of Mother Rangi Priestley (6 years old)
1937 - 19 December Death of Grandfather/Father William Augustine Priestley (10 years old)
1939 - Start of WWII. Germany invades Poland.
1945 - WWII ends
1945 - 24 March Death of Grandmother / Mother Kate Campbell (18 years old)
1950 - Korean War. (1950-1953)
1952 - New Zealand's population reaches over two million.
1953 - 19 December Married James Louis Stowers in Auckland. (26 years old)
1954 - 21 July daughter Maria Joy Stowers born in Auckland. (27 years old)
1955 - 19 December son Louis Edward Stowers born in Auckland. (28 years old)
1958 - 20 July father Donald Rangiuia died (31 years old)
1958 - 31 July son Michael Joseph Stowers born in Taumarunui. (31 years old)
1960 - 01 January son Peter Lloyd Stowers born in Taumarunui. (32 years old)
1961 - 27 March daughter Julia Agnes born in Taumarunui. (34 years old)
1961 - 19 June daughter Julia Agnes dies in Ohura (cot death). (34 years old)
1962 - 30 October son Vincent James Stowers born in Taumarunui. (35 years old)
1964 - 03 April son John Anthony Stowers born in Taumarunui. (37 years old)
1965 - 10 May son Leon Patrick Stowers born in Taumarunui. (38 years old)
1968 - Wahine inter-island ferry disaster.
1969 - 20 July man landed on the moon
1969 - 22 July daughter Rachael Magdalen born in Taumarunui. (42 years old)
1971 - Moved from Ohura to Mangere, South Auckland. (44 years old)
1972 - New Zealand now has two TV channels with the arrival of, wait for it...Network Two.
1973 - 18 November uncle James Patterson 'Pat' Priestley died (46 years old)
1974 - World population reaches 4 billion.
1977 - 06 August Elvis Presley dies
1979 - Margaret Thatcher became British Prime Minister
1980 - 06 January grand daughter Angela Mary Leigh born (53 years old)
1981 - 08 June grand daughter Lisa Mary Stowers born,
1981 - 03 July grand son Adam McDonald born (54 years)
1982 - Falkands War
1984 - 02 December Bhopal disaster
1985 - 14 September son Peter Lloyd and Leigh Suzan Maurice married. (58 years old)
1985 - October first overseas trip to Samoa. (58 years old)
1986 - 12 April son John Anthony and Linda Mary Harrison married (59 years old)
1986 - 23 May son Vincent James and Helen Anne Birnie marry (59 years old)
1987 - 28 January grand daughter Kataraina Mary Leigh born (60 years)
1987 - 08 June New Zealand becomes nuclear free
1988 - 16 April grand daughter Robyn Maria born (61 years)
1989 - 08 September grand daughter Kura Maureen born (62 years)
1990 -14 March grand son Sam Patrick born,
1990 - 25 April grand son Zane Louis Archer born,
1990 - 03 September grand son Ian Stuart born (63 years old)
1992 - 01 October grand son James Michael born,
1992 - 03 December grand son Ben James Denning born(65 years)
1993 - 12 November grand son Travis Lando Archer born (66 years old)
1994 - 13 August grand son Sean Vincent born,
1994 - 16 November grand son Max John Stowers born (67 years old)
1996 - Couisin Peter Scott died (69 years old)
1997 - 26 June Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone was first published
1999 - World population reaches 6 billion.
2001 - 02 August Aunty Maraea 'Marie' Priestly dies (74 years old)
2001 - 11 September Twin Towers attacked by terrorists
2002 - 19 March cousin Rata Morris died (75 years old)
2003 - Half brother Tamati Nehu 'Tom' Rangiuia died (76 years old)
2004 - May Diagnosed with terminal cancer.
2004 - June Final trip to Gisborne.
2004 - 16 November Died in Auckland (77 years, 9 months, 11 days old)
Mary left specific instructions with her children that she was to be cremated and her ashes were to be divided into two boxes. One box was to be buried close to her daughter Julia. The second box was to be buried with her grand parents and and her mother at Manutuke. Mary did not want a religious service so a celebrant as well as Mary's family and friends spoke at her funeral.
In June 2004, Mary's family took her back to Gisborne for one final visit. She spent time with her cousin Ida laughing and reminiscing. She also made her way around various cemeteries where she paid her respects to all her long departed and beloved family. She made sure to plant the seeds in the minds of her children and grandchildren so that they could find their way back to the family who had passed before them.
On Tuesday morning, 16 November 2004, at one minute after midnight, After many visits by family close friends and family. Mary died peacefully at home surrounded by her husband, children, grandchildren.
Mary and James outside 47 Cochrane St during her last trip to Gisborne in June 2004.
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