School Life - What Was I Doing There?

School was a funny place to be in for many years (from Year 1 to Year 4) I was left to my own devices of moulding bits of play dough to sifting sand through fingers and looking at litre bottles of water with pin prick holes through it and stimming at the little tiny spouts of water coming out. I had no idea of people nor did I have any idea what was expected of me from a social point of view. I was simply being and that isn't a bad thing is it?

It wasn't until Year 4 came that the troubles began as I mentioned in my previous page my language took a dramatic leap in terms of cognitive understanding. What came next was simple bullying and I had years of it. In my case it was teachers and fellow students trying get their sad sadistic pleasure out of belittling me in front of other students and making me feel like an outsider. In Year 6 a teacher took it upon herself to make my life a living hell for that final year at primary school results in onset childhood depression and social anxiety. I was taken to CAMHS (Child & Adolescence Mental Health Services). This was a very negative unproductive time for both me and my parents. I was taken to this strange hut every Thursday, I can still remember the damp smell of the place. I was put in a room with about 12 other students around the same age as me and what where they teaching us? Social skills! Irony is stupid so American director John Waters says I think he has a point at least in my case anyway.

Secondary School - Round 2

After a terrible year at primary school I went to secondary school (like most people I suppose!) In the first two weeks I was bullied and from Year 7 to Year 11 that is all I got. My parents and I had next to no support from anybody at the school it was a very difficult time I had grown overweight due to depression I would just eat and eat. I stuck out like a rather large sore thumb. I hated every lesson because I knew what was coming if I wasn't being abused by the students in my class both physically (but mostly verbally), teachers also took a pop at me a few times belittling me further in front of my already "friendly" classmates. Towards the last year of secondary school the bullying was starting to take its toll on me, I was mentally ill not that anyone seemed to care. I had stopped looking after myself I couldn't be bothered to wash myself or brush my teeth and would go into school with dirty hair and bad breath I didn't care. I was severely depressed at this point and looking back I probably should have been removed from school. I was predicted good grades for some of my favourite subjects. I got low grades because at that point I just couldn't be bothered. I just wanted to leave.

College- Best Educational Year

When I decided to go college I was fortunate enough to go to a place that was in some ways very Autistic friendly! (even thought I wasn't diagnosed at the time) I had a brilliant time. It was a small class no more than 5 students and I had more or less one to one support and I enjoyed every single aspect of being there. At the end of that year I was awarded Best Student of the year, and my parents were very proud of my achievements. I am glad for once that I enjoyed education and was treated like a human being in the class.