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Here are what I've recalled of various now gone Youtube Videos and old Websites.
Read and learn and muse and get inspired and use any of this stuff in any combination.
JKTIM
JKTIM (Just Keep That In Mind AKA David Thomas Hardy) was a minor friend of mine and Youtube
Ranter who did pranks, sent arge amounts of wierd stuff to other Youtubers for Prank reasons,
and went to the Dollar Tree. Here is what I've recalled of his now down rants.
1: JKTIM's Jeopardy! Rant
He said "The Title should really be pronounced "JEOPARDY" (Yes,with a Yell), and that he hated
Alex Trebek more than he hated Osama Bin Laden; - "Which may be bad of me, but hey...",
and then he said "No one gives a fuck if Jeopardy is in Hi-Def, Jeopardy's the only show where
if they returned to showing it in Black and White, no one would give a shit", and "oooh, Alex
Trebek's mustache is highly detailed, oh, that's right, Alex Trebek doesn't even HAVE his
mustache anymore." And then he explained that this guy, a contestant described his shower
curtains having a map of the world on it, and Alex Trebek intruded like a BASTARD and a CREEP
on his personal space; - asking if he showered with his wife. The guy said uneasily "I'm not sure
I wanna answer that".
2: JKTIM did something on Walmart greeters and how they're pointless, although in the comments of his
original 2007 upload, some people said they looked out for shoplifters and stuff. JKTIM also talked
about Retarded people, some Retard's Dad who knew jack shit about Retards, which JKTIM corrected,
JKTIM's love of "Radio", starring Rosie'o'Donnell playing a Retard, and JKTIM dealing with an awkward
Retard Cashier at Target who just stared at him, then when he left, she called out "Sir, SIR!!!"
Skins2153 and Thumbswayup
Dragonball Z: The Real Abridged Episode 5
This Episode is mostly lost. After watching this Episode with a Margherita Pizza, I memorized this
under production for 14 monthes Episode ("We think God doesn't want us to do this Episode, we're on the
run from Shadow Department of Adult Diaper Security Robed Figures. -Skins2153) nads here is the beginning
*AND* the end:
Narrator, thins and reedy voice as opposed to Guru's deep, echoing voice:
Legend tells, of a mystic fighting force of EXTRAORDINARY MAGNITUDE...
*Pirate Music*
Ginyu and Jeice
Ginyu: Jeice! Fetch me my Codpiece!!!
Jeice: Where'd ya leave it?
Ginyu: (Bellows like a drunk troglite at Club Epic): In the microwave!!!!!
*Naruto Song; - Right Here, Right Now*
Gohan, Krillin and Vegeta fly to put their Dragon Ball with the other Dragon Balls discussing plans for
keeping them away from the bad guys and if the Dragon was an Irish Scot from Illuvatar; "Bust out the Kilts
and Bagpipes"
Then (If you run into the mysterious Purple Man, he will Rape you in the Ass)
They arrive to find Ginyu waiting for them.
Ginyu: Okay Boys, I'm gonna rape you in the Ass!!!
*Part 2, visible from Skins32153@fuckYTAIsMonkeys.com*
And in Part 3, Goku yells that he forgot his Nyoi-bo, and their all doomed, Vegeta makes a word-catchy comment,
and whichever version you watch, they get Goku in the Healing Chamber and get out, and Freeza says "well shiver
me' Timbers, hearties, and Yo Ho Ho!!!"
"We did it, but Thumbswayup caught throat Cancer while doing Krillin's voice after completing the Episode (most of the episode was Lost and had to be DONE AGAIN...), and we'll think and work LONG AND HARD about doing the next one,
and we'll just be TOO FUCKING busy to do it in the next month. -Skins2153 on likelihood of doing new episodes.
Gorefreak6:
Gorefreak was a funny Youtube Ranter, and friend of JKTIM.
He left funny comments on JKTIM's Channel, the best being this"
"David, the Flying Burrito Brothers are calling, they want to come to your house and make you a Flying Burrito Brother and fly into the alternative jazz night of the Flying Burrito Height."
Akewsticrockr:
He did some parody and guitar stuff, and then did the one funny video he ever made:
"The Christian Nintendo Nerd"
The game begins.
"Where the Sex am I? What the Sex is this Poop? Son of an unwed mother!!!"
He then complains of being trapped in the sexen room and of the same things James Rolfe ran into, the best commenter saying "ha ha this is one really funny christian i'm really getting behind".
He then did a serious game review "Flash Sexen and the Alien Asylum", and just... didn't give a shit about doing another Christian Nintendo Nerd OR Game Review.
Olen Alex, Akewstic, Wetsuit Girl
Some 10-year-old boy in glasses, with somewhat bowl-cut shaped blonde hair, videotaped his sister and (<---) Friend,
put it on YOutube, they're in Wetsuits, and he says "Well, there's Astronaut Diver... Sally, and there's Astronaut Diver...
Sandy, and he sees them swim for aroudn five minutes, and then he tells them to Fly and Dive, and then they do, he tells
them to do it again with some stupid bullshit and fuss, and then he says "They're fucking retards", and then the video
simply cuts out, there.
Who Is The Gold Ranger?
This was on Manny Perez's old Power Rangers Website; - the Morphing Grid, in it, there was this mysterious "Dare Da"
6th Ranger question, even though Zeo has been finished since December '96, here were the theories:
1: The Gold Ranger is Billy.
2: The Gold Ranger is Ryan Steele from VR Troopers.
3: The Gold Ranger is Tommy. He loses his Powers and is replaced by Ryan Steele, then returns as the Gold Ranger
in a White Light-Style Storyline
4: Jason returns to play the Gold Ranger.
I correctly guessed 4, but reading all this is fascinating, and such.
JTPFreak: Scary Monster
First, "Scary Monster' is the long-nosed blue fright wig sucker in Glasses with lenses shaped like blue palm trees,
who appeared in "Happy Halloween", when Jason says "Happy Halloween" 3 times at night, and in the beginning of this
video, Jason surrounded by darkness, says "There's something out to get me! Think it's a Ghost."
The monster comes, and then says "I have come... to take you away"
And then another Monster, JTPFreak using a harlequin black/white and white/black stripe pattern on the area around the
eyes and mouth mask (focused a screwy lot on the description), who's a soft-voiced, cool, suave woman, says
"You must listen to me"
JTPFreak asks "Listen to you?"
She says "That's Right, listen to me."
The Scary Monster says "Don't listen to her."
then the scary monster says he's going to take JTPFreak's soul and then JTPFreak says "Not my soul! I need that to catch the bus!!!"
Sabine asks "Catch the Bus? Why to Humans always have such strange lines?"
JTPFreak gets mopey and says "I'm not Weird."
Sabine gets JTPFreak to count down with her: "5...4...3...2...1"
And the Scary Monster disappears somehow in some kind of magico-electrical vortex.
JTPFreak says "You're my hero."
Then a wobbly parabola sfx from the 1960s plays and the video ends.
Psychotic Furious George
Ed Note: This was the second Game, a 'Choose Your Own Adventure' stretched out across 22 pages, and I *FORGOT* the first Game, due to Several *KINDS* of Hyphenated-Nazis, an Incontinent Grandpa, and Timothy Mcveigh Rebels bombing Kansas, Georgia and South Carolina, so read this; - it's about taking a Preschooler Peeing-in-Pants Monkey and making him Vulgar, Rated R Taliclastigiggen (Drunk Red Scot said it, at that one bar)...
The Game has no possibilities or congruent consistency; - You are met with pairs of choices, one of them always gets you killed in sometimes funny ways, the other progresses, so it's a "Try-Not-To-Get-Killed" simulator, rather than a real interactive game taht doesn't have crappy MS-DOS Graphics the Cat Shit on.
You are in a bland yellow house with a loveseat, a normal white kitchen, bathroom, and maybe more than 1 Bedrrom, although whether there are any more than yours is unclear.
You call smoo guy, and he sends a secret agent over, and you can choose to watch Home Alone and make a trap you die in (SHOCKINGLY 8-( ),
You call and some secret agent shows up, (I nearly lost a liver writign this, slow, contradictingly Butt-Pirates),
and he takes the center of the Couch, making it hard for you to sit down without him thinking you're gay.
Then, he asks "Do You Cha-Cha?". You then dance, and then you Panicingly wail and think "Oh No, How could this be happening?!? Why can't I get out of this, why is he even DOING this, much less leaving me to make Popcorn and watch Batman while Walrus Pirates are loose, much less beat Burai Fighter Level 13 in Nightmare? Why is this Stupid Hellish Unfair thing happening?", You are screwed, especially if you take choice 'B'...
Then Furious George lockpicks the door, shoots him, and takes you through a Bank, Art Museum, and Train Station, where you do stuff with Spy Gadgets, then you take a Plane, and at asome point (I WAS ATTACKED BY NINJAS!!! -Furious George)
And you can run into Vishnu, listen to his sage advice, or eat the mushroom out from under him, causing him to fall and kill you.
You jump out of the plane at some point, and you forget to pull your parachute, and you pray, GOD is on the toilet, and you
die, alternatively, you get split in half, and look at your legs, seeing poop streaming from the pants. You don't take tap dancing lessons in the House of Blues, New Athiestic German Isreali Meth-Whore(Censored for Offending Mr. Popo and his Painful Fists)
You also can wlak by a Cat and move on, interacting with Furious George, or something (probably on purpose, and *NOT* Supernatural) just causes you to trip, and you fall down four basement stairs, bleeding to death, and you see the Cat
watching you with detached interest.
Then, you and George pilot a few 20th Century Reusable Space Planes, or a few Hundred (I may hav miscounted), and you arrive on the moon sing and dance with surreal music playing.
Then you "win" this "game".
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