1. A gents Martha's no on
2. OURS
3. Herman Cain, American
4. OURS
5. rooibos, ribs
6. Candy Land, Dylan, none, cannoned
7. vile tie/Nader tasse, Saturday Night Live
8. OURS
9. Edward Lear. Welded
10. OURS
11. siddurim, druidism
12. fried, Abie, fork on
13. cannon, canon; ordinance, ordnance
14. tough enough, ten
15. OURS
16. speculatory, upset your applecart
17. OURS
18. garment, Garmin; Garmin, garden
19. cupped, Pawtucket
20. moral, femoral
21. OURS
22. wide-awake; Ida, ache
23. proverb, Rover
24. Lanai City; analytic
25. appetite, petit, plebe, Applebee's
26. ephemeral, femoral
27. rhotacism, Simchas Torah
28. OURS
29. be insane, base nine
30. OURS
31. Asta, lain; Alsatian
32. solitary royalist
33. supramodeling, le plus grand enigme du monde
34. OURS
35. OURS
36. Post Hunt, infamous, posthumous, infant
37. insolvent, insolent
38. direct deposit
39. supermodel
40. "no credit, no problem"
41. pate de foie gras
42. Chinese restaurant
43. repulsive
44. Dominique Strauss-Kahn
45. coinage
46. OURS
47. Osama bin Laden
48. Woody Allen's Midnight in Paris
49. funeral home
50. Yemeni President Ali Abdullah Saleh
F-1. Q
GCH
WRKRS
GRGBRNS
QCKBRWNFX
HRRWSCHL
SNNCHRB
SFHRBR
XLBRS
F-2. MW
PSTP
MRTHNR
MSPRNTNG
CRSSCRRNTS
WHLDTHSTRTHS
DCLRTNFNDPNDNC
F-3. OURS
F-4. EMANATISTS
SALOMONIAN
PROVIDENCE
OCEANSTATE
F-5. CCQ*QNSZ
LLRQN*PV
QNNNSLC*
SD*FLBBD
*SCHNRRR
MTHRDT*Q
QNCT*TJN
N*GSMSKS
F-6. SC
TCMS
MNHNTR
DSNDDNTS
MSSSSGDSML
HWHHSTTSSLST
STRKWHLTHRNSHT
X-1. Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. Bob Hope
X-2. Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning? G. W. Bush
X-3. STACKER
A S R E
LASSIES
T U S P
IVANHOE
N G N C
ELEGANT
X-4. FROSTBITE
AUDIOEXAM
ISURGESPI
NOREASTER
SNOWSTORM
KJCETHOSA
EARSYODEL
WINTERIZE
X-5. Fish, to taste right, must swim three times - in water, in butter and in wine. Polish proverb
X-6. CABBAGEEVENTE
ATLASAGLITTER
VSEBFWUANSUDG
INTERESTSINGE
TIBIASTELLING
YAELIRECETCIA
CREELEDUMIAKS
AFTERCHAMBERS
NERTONYFAMIIE
TRESPASSTASER
ALINEDONAGERS
Across:
1. CABBAGE
2. EVENT
3. ATLAS
4. AGLITTER
5. INTEREST
6. SINGE
7. TIBIAS
8. TELLING
9. CREELED
10. UMIAKS
11. AFTER
12. CHAMBERS
13. TRESPASS
14. TASER
15. LINED
16. ONAGERS
Downs and Ups
A. CAVITY
B. CANTAL
C. REFRAINS
D. TABLET
E. BEET
F. REIN
G. STEELIE
H. BABAS
I. FRAIL
J. ROPEDANCER
K. SEWAGE
L. GUSTED
M. HYSONS
N. FAUCET
O. ALEVINS
P. LEMMATA
Q. GAMBIT
R. LISTEN
S. TUNICAE
T. ISERE
U. IRKING
V. DETERGE
W. GASSERS
X-7. ADDXENON
NEEMNEWO DDX
IMKENULL
KEANUALA YS
HAWAIIAN
ONENAOMI XYZZY
YAWNHOAA
LSEEOZZY
EPOXYEEN
C-1. "How bad is my wife's cooking? So bad that the flies pitched in to fix the screen door." Rodney Dangerfield
C-2. Middle age is that time when hair starts growing where it never grew and stops growing where it always did.
C-3. OURS
C-4. Found inside fortune cookie: "Your infinite capacity for patience will be rewarded sooner or later."
C-5. Graduation speaker offered only incoherent remarks. None knew what his commencement commmments meant.
C-6. Hipaapotamus: gigantic slow-moving dimwitted semi-mythical beast, symbol of streamlined medical care.
C-7. Household appliance resists percussive repair with blunt instrument? Suspect electrical problem.