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My Ghost Dance Dream
August 4, 2005
...it was hot and I woke up all upset about a dream I had experienced... This was NOT a normal dream... it was VERY VERY real... I was in a lodge or tipi and it was very dark except for the fire and I was painting an old man's face white... he was obviously very important. He had long white hair and was dressed in fine white buckskins with ermine trim and red and blue beading.... but he was dead... it was all VERY real - not like a normal dream. I was crying, not sobbing, but with tears rolling down my cheeks because I had lost him... we had all lost him and I knew that he was the 'last of the old ones'... but I knew that I had to continue what I was doing... because it was VERY important... I could hear singing and drumming outside and smell the smoke from the cedar and sage of the fire and the smoke swirled around me and it made me dizzy....
As I applied the white paint very gently with my hands he became younger again and was quite handsome and then he came back alive and talked to me in his language - I don't know what it was - maybe Lakota ? or Cheyenne? - I don't know... but in my dream I understood what he said. And he told many things about the time before and the time to come and he said I should tell only one person those things and that I would not remember anyway until the time was right and that I would know who it was when I met them and then I would remember the message...
But one thing he told me that I should know now, and should think on, was that "it is time now", and that "before, it was too soon and the white people did not understand and the natives were not ready yet" and I knew he meant "time for 'the dance'- 'time to begin to heal the circle again'.
Then the smoke and drums and singing whirled... sort of... hard to describe... and I woke up in my bed with tears in my eyes...
When I awoke I was quite shaken... not afraid... just troubled by it... I had no idea who he was or what he was talking about. That dream bothered me a LOT for about a week while I tried to figure out what he meant and who he was talking about that I should tell... I did a lot of research on the net... but I found nothing that helped me understand...
(it is now 2009 and I believe he may have been Kicking Bear whom I had depicted in this doll in 2004 perhaps this is why he spoke to me?)
Then a client in England contacted me out of the blue and asked if I could make him a Ghost Dance doll (which I told him I could not)... and, you know, I have all these books about Native Americans and well duh! I had of course heard of the Ghost Dance, but I didn't know what it was really... I thought it was just a fake religion that the Indians got somehow from the Mormons and in desperation they thought it would bring back the bison and of course the whites misunderstood the whole thing as usual... I know they thought their shirts would stop the bullets, and that if they danced enough, the ancestors would come back and the whites would leave... it did not exactly work out that way... that's all I knew... I am not really into the individual Native cultures, makes me too depressed to read about what my people did... I just always liked the pretty beaded horses...
Oh... well... but then I had this dream / vision... and it was really bugging me.... so I looked up 'Ghost Dance' on the net and I found this...http://www.voanews.com/audio/Audio/19583.html
http://www.voanews.com/english/news/a-13-2005-08-04-voa61-66935367.html
They no longer offer the audio track... it is just the transcript, but THIS was happening the SAME NIGHT I had that dream.... but I didn't know until a week later... and that was WAY too spooky! so I started researching the Ghost Dance religion... and found out that they ...painted their faces white... so then I knew what 'the Ghost Dance' was for sure... but still I don't understand the dream...
I think he was trying to tell me that they had all gotten the message wrong...
Indian and white and it was not the right time yet...
not back then...
and if you think about it...
maybe it is the right time coming now...
even the most ignorant white people will not shoot Native Americans for dancing now - in fact they will pay you to do it...
and we actually CAN bring back the bison to the plains if we work together...
and I know there are some people would like to live in the old ways ...and we actually could now if we really want to... and it may be the only way to get the traditional people back on the 'red road' and away from all the drugs and alcohol.... there are plenty of white people, like me, who would like to help to teach what we know and would like to learn form the elders what they know... we would gladly give back some of what was taken away through teaching and sharing what we know and can learn... not through some misguided sense of charity or guilt... (I don't feel guilty... just mad about what happened through the government's ignorance and greed)... but there are many who I think would like to learn and teach through a common love and respect of tradition, nature and mother earth... and strangely enough we are the 'keepers' of the past... with the knowledge and expertise of the 'old ways' that so many people have lost... yours and mine...
“Intuition is really a sudden immersion of the soul into the universal current of life.”
from The Alchemist by Paulo Coehlo
Anyway... I get wound up about it and ramble sometimes, but I still don't know who I am supposed to tell my vision to or exactly what I am supposed to do about it. I just know that when the time comes and I am in the right place I will know who to tell and what to tell them... I also know.... because he told me... that I must be prepared for whatever happens and that also it will change everything in my life and the lives of all others who will be involved... life is strange... but hey, I did not ask for this message... and I am only the messenger... anyway, maybe it is time for me to take that journey... I feel so small to have to take this on... but I guess I do have some coping skills, and maybe I can offer a different insight... if anyone will listen.
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A long time ago an old woman walked up to me, at a pow-wow somewhere out in Montana I think, and told me that I had an 'old soul' and that I was 'special'... and that I would do special things someday... so I guess maybe I am avoiding my destiny?
I am no closer to knowing which path to follow... I am worried about all of us... worried about the planet... and worried about how my family will fare and how I will pay my own bills and how we will all even survive in the changing world...
"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.”
from The Alchemist by Paulo Coehlo
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In searching for my own answers I found this and thought it was very important that I pass it on to anyone who comes here....
Message From The Hopi Elders
"To my fellow swimmers:
There is a river flowing now very fast.
It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid
They will try to hold onto the shore.
They are being torn apart and will suffer greatly.
Know that the river has its destination.
We must let go of the shore, push off into the river, keep our heads above water.
At this time in our history, we are to take nothing personally, least of all ourselves.
For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey come to a halt.
The time of the lone wolf is over.
Gather yourselves.
Banish the word struggle from your attitude and vocabulary.
All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration.
We are the ones we have been waiting for"
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