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Instructions
Instructions
Consider this section 1-3 months prior to depature!
Consider this section 1-3 months prior to depature!
What makes you sad about leaving?
What are you losing that you are grieving?
What are your present doubts and anxieties about returning to your country of origin / as you move to a new field of ministry?
What, if anything, are you dreading?
What experiences are you looking forward to in positive ways? What do you feel most excited about in your next phase of life?
What are your hopes for your extended family relationships and how they will respond to your upcoming move?
It is easy for us to have expectations without being aware of it. Take some time to reflect with the Lord concerning expectations you may have. Might the Lord have some wisdom, guidance or invitation for you concerning your expectations?
"Ask, seek, and knock" can, as Dallas Willard notes, apply to human as well as divine relationships. What might be helpful for you to ask or express to your loved ones, in the interest of good communication?
What will be helpful for them to know concerning your needs and hopes upon your arrival?
How might you be able to communicate these things in helpful ways before you arrive?
What are your hopes for your relationships with friends and how they will respond to your return?
Are your hopes realistic, based on your history with them?
How might you be able to you communicate your hopes in helpful ways before you arrive?
What are some of the things you want to do after your return to thank your family and friends for the various ways in which they have supported you?
What are ways you can show interest in what has been happening in their lives when you get back?
Sharing Your Story
Sharing Your Story
Here's a 'heads up' for re-entry to your country of origin: many of your family and friends will have limited capacity to listen to your stories. They do love you. But some people will feel safer about hearing your story when they have spent time with you. It will help them to be reminded that you are truly interested in their lives, that your life overseas has not lessened your love for them, and that you haven't become so unique and different after years overseas that they can no longer relate to you.
At the same time, you will want to begin sharing real parts of your story and heart with your friends and family, and have your sharing constantly cut short can easily make you feel that your experiences and learning has no value In your new setting, and It can even be hurtful. It can help significantly if you are prepared for this dynamic!
For this reason, we encourage you to prepare vignettes and parts of your story in 1-, 3-, and 5-minute versions. This way, when someone asks you, “How was it?” you will be prepared to share something real and true and interesting (or funny, poignant, etc.) while being prepared for them to change the subject. Hopefully you will leave them wanting more!
Suggestion: Collect some of the most important memories you have and find ways to express them succinctly. Include:
aspects of your life in your country,
vignettes that are representative of the culture in both positive and challenging ways;
funny / poignant memories;
circumstances that challenged your worldview;
things that you learned;
things about yourself or the culture that you want to share.
Reflection Opportunity
Pause now and craft three responses to the question: "How was it?"
1-minute version
3-minute version
5-minute version
Finally:
Think of a few people in your life who have the capacity to truly listen, people with whom you would like to share yourself.
Contact them several weeks before your arrival and say, “I’m going to give everyone else the 5-minute version – but could I schedule a day to share some of these last years, and how all the changes I am experiencing are effecting me?”
Set the date!
Download the PDF 'Welcome Home: A Guide for Welcoming Your Expat' from Appendix D and give it to your friends before you get together. It will give them have a better idea of what will help you during your time together.
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