Sometimes students see, hear, or experience something that concerns or hurts them.  Often they fear seeking adult support, believing that doing so will cause them more harm (if the situation is happening to them) or direct the harm towards them (if they are speaking out for someone else).  This can cause students to feel like they are carrying the 'weight of the world" on their shoulders.

As such, students often leave the situation to 'handle it themselves' or ignore it all together.  This typically results in incredible stress, and/or an escalation of the situation.  Students may feel that they can talk to their friends about it, rather than seeking adult support.  It is important to remember that your friends are amazing and may know you well (and possibly the others involved), BUT they have the same limited experiences and are also limited in how they can support.

Here is what you need to know if you make the brilliant and brave step to speak to a Caring Adult:

• The school's primary goal is to ensure emotional and physical safety. 

• Schools assess each situation on an individual basis.  There is protocol to follow to ensure a deep understanding of a situation before making any decision. 

• In most cases, 'progressive discipline' is implemented - this is a method of discipline that uses gradual steps for dealing with concerns related to a person's conduct. The ultimate objective of progressive discipline is to help students correct conduct problems and resolve issues in the earliest stages.   If there is another infraction, the disciplinary action escalates.  

• If students delay in coming forward, the situation can escalate.  TRUTH! - this can be frustrating to students when the school then needs to start the progressive discipline.   Coming forward early, can minimize escalation.

• LET'S FACE IT - Students fear 'retaliation' for coming forward.  **It is essential to realize that the school is very aware of the strategies that can be used to 'retaliate,' and next-level consequences are made very clear.  The school will respond with increased discipline if behaviour continues against a student (ie. a student cannot instruct a friend to act on their behalf - the original party would also face discipline).  Typically, afflicting students will let the situation go, as it is not worth the consequences. 

• Trust the process.  It actually works!  The longer a student delays in coming forward, the longer it can take to initiate the process of eradicating the situation.  

Are you keeping quiet and you are worried about someone or something?

Sometimes students are keeping a secret for a friend - maybe you are helping them through it, or you have heard about it from someone else and you find the information worrying.  Often students feel that staying quiet IS being a friend, and sometimes they just don't know who to tell.  

Guidance is the best starting point!

Again, you have to remember that your ability to support is going to be limited, simply due to your age on this Earth.  Even if you have had a lot of life experience, you will still have limitations.  And some students are going through some really big things!! It is important to not keep a secret that could do more harm than good - always, always err on the side of caution.  It is better for someone to be mad at you, than at risk.   

Students should seek out a caring adult if you, someone you care about, or simply someone you heard about is experiencing something distressing.  This can include harmful relationships (romantic or friendship), distress at home, suicidal thoughts, risk of mental and/or physical health issues, homophobia, temptation to begin or continue unhealthy patterns with drugs and alcohol, participation in risky sexual activity and behavior, racism, exposure to on-screen violence and unhealthy social media, abuse, .... anything you find worrisome. 

Guidance is a safe place to start.  We will listen, and we will talk you through this.  No problem is too big or too small.

Check out the conversation starters on the poster to the right if you need help reaching out.

Students and/or Guardians can let the school know about a situation by clicking the Report It! link (above image, and on the bottom of the Main page of the MSS website).  This is for non-emergencies only, as it is not monitored 24hr a day (please call 911 for emergencies).  THIS IS ANONYMOUS.  No one will know who submitted the form.  As such, it is critical that as much detail as possible is provided so that the school can properly investigate and follow up.

When this form is submitted, it goes to the school's Admin and the Superintendent.  Admin will begin an investigation into the information provided in the report - hence needing detail to ensure the ability to act upon it.  The Superintendent follows up with Admin to determine the conclusion of the situation.  

Again, this form is anonymous, unless the submitting person indicates that they are willing to be contacted (or submits revealing details).   It is found that seeking a Caring Adult is the most effective and altering process.   Please consider those options, as sometimes anonymous is not the effective route to go.