The Using Our Words Tool helps us know which words to use to make things right. Using the right words, in the right way at the right time, helps us find a solution to the situation and become our own problem-solvers. 

• When other people do things you don’t like, do you tell them how you feel about that honestly and respectfully?

• Why do you suppose it is sometimes so difficult to share our feelings with others when they upset us or do something we don’t like?

• It is much easier to tattle or “snitch” by telling on them, but snitching doesn’t really solve anything and can sometimes be risky. Tattling or snitching only encourages us to complain about the situation and it often doesn’t really help solve it. 

When other people do things we don’t like, it is important to know how to use words in ways that are helpful. Try to identify helpful vs. harmful words to support with identifying how to share information. 

Tell your students that our feelings/emotions are important pieces of missing information that, if shared with others, will help us with our relationships. Invite your students to begin to notice what the missing information is in their relationships. 

• • Does your best friend know when they hurt your feelings? 

  • Do they know how much you appreciate their friendship?

  • Ask students why they think we don’t share this important emotional information?