Important Notes:
*Keep in mind these could be activating questions for many students
*If student self-reports lower than a 5 on a sliding scale question, possible counselor referral needed
*If student has a difficult time (beyond appropriate shyness) answering many of these vulnerable questions, a possible counseling referral may be needed
*If a student shares any yellow or red flags with you let them know that you WILL touch base with the school counselor, but they can choose if they want to proceed with the counselor
*People can grieve the loss of many things beyond just a person. Remember often grief comes with any sort of severe change or sorrow
* PLEASE try and avoid jumping into academics first
* BE AWARE TO NOT MAKE THIS ABOUT YOURSELF
* AVOID SAYING THE WORDS “AT LEAST” or “I UNDERSTAND”
“Thank you for sharing, that must be really hard”
“What can I do to support you/How can I show up for you today?”
“Are you aware grief can look differ from person to person?”
o Grief looks different for everyone
o Sometimes grief hits us at different times
o Sometimes grief can affect us much later after an event
“I am here for you if you want to talk”
Give them space (sometimes that means sitting with their silence)
“Are you receiving any help/support right now? Can I support you in getting help (i.e., counseling team, mental health services, grief counseling etc.)?”
“Do your family members/friends need more support?”
“I am going to check on you later this week, are you comfortable with that? Why don't we give you some space and let's check in at our next scheduled meeting Can I connect you to (i.e., counseling team, mental health services, grief counseling…)”
“There is no timeline with grief, take time for self-care, be gentle and kind with yourself and let's check back at the end of the week?”
Coming back after bereavement (Remember this could look different for everyone)
“Let’s start off really easy, how about a quick check in?”
“Maybe to start let’s begin with a simple/smaller credit and will go through it together, I am here for you, take your time, we will take it slow…”
Maybe take this opportunity with the student to educate them on refocusing your brain and why it is important/helpful however STILL offering space, breaks, mental self-care
Coming up with a safe word to let staff/teachers know they need a break/support
“Do you want me to share what you are experiencing and where you are at with anyone else at school?”
"How would you like them to communicate with you during this time?