Protecting and standing up for yourself

For yourself

• Prior to going to an audition / interview (or ‘coffee’)

  • • ⌛ Give yourself some time to reflect about your boundaries and preferences, based on the stated parameters in the audition call and what you know about the organisers and/or the institution/company

      • • For instance, if the audition notice stated that the role involves ‘partial nudity’, consider how much ‘partial nudity’ you would be comfortable with - not just onstage, but also for the audition itself, if such a request was made

❣️ If you haven’t worked with the organisers or the institution/company before, it could be worth asking people they’ve worked with before about their experience working with the organisers or the institution/company!

• • • 🧐 How many details are stated in the audition call / job application? Do they give a clear sense of expectations as well as the corresponding remuneration? If not, these are details that would be worth clarifying in the audition/interview - and their response to questions about these would also be a good indication of whether the details were accidentally omitted, or whether the organisers are deliberately trying to keep things vague to blur boundaries etc.

• When invited to join a project

  • • 🧐 How much does the project / the process / the working styles of the team seem aligned with your own values and preferences? If they feel deeply mismatched, even if the fees or the opportunity as a whole seem very attractive, it might not be worth the potential stress if anything goes wrong in the project, especially if the engagement is quite long-term (whatever that means to you)

    • ❗ If the project seems like it might be challenging but in a good / exciting way though, what can be helpful is to take some time to reflect on your current and projected capacity over the course of the project, and also whether your current support system might be sufficient - if it might not be, is there someone you can reach out to or something that you can adjust for the duration of the project?

    • 💬 In negotiating your involvement with the project, depending on your level of comfort, you can consider explicitly asking for some time to talk through these points as part of the conversation/negotiation before you say yes, OR just casually checking on whether the organisers/institution has specific protocols in relation to e.g. reporting mechanisms, time-outs, other specific access or boundary needs you have etc.

      • • This is important because if harm or hurt is caused, having had prior conversation about what to do/what can be done in such situations can help make the situation easier for everyone involved to grapple with

❣️ It can also be helpful to ensure that the conversation around this is put down on paper somewhere, be it over text or a more formal document, to check that everyone is really on the same page, and also to make it easier to reference as needed

• When approached for a project

  • • • 💬 In negotiating your involvement with the project, it can be helpful to clarify preferences and protocols around informal and/or formal channels of communications in relation to raising troubling aspects about the process, the project itself, or someone on the project team.

      • 💬 For longer and/or more intense projects, depending on your preference, you could also consider explicitly asking for a midpoint check in and/or a post-mortem to be included as part of the process for the project. Again, depending on your preference, you might ask for this for just yourself, and/or for this to take place as a full team exercise.

• When discussing your involvement for a project

  • • 💬 Take some time to ensure that you are clear about the parameters that are asked of you!

      • For instance, in performing arts projects, there is often the expectation that some work will be done outside of the stipulated rehearsal timings, such as having to memorise scripts before a certain point in the project.

      • For more process-based projects and projects in which the material is being devised together as a group, there might be further requests as well for people to engage in additional research and/or more structured reflections outside of scheduled project sessions, so depending on the type of project, it might be worth asking for specifics about the kind(s) of work that you might have to engage in, and the anticipated degree of intensity e.g. sharing 1-2 loose paragraphs about your reflections would be less time-intensive than having to answer a series of 10 structured questions.

    • 💬 Are you clear and comfortable about their terms of hire e.g. welfare and safety policy, insurance coverage, fees and the payment schedule?

      • It is entirely reasonable to ask for a certain percentage of your fees to be paid upfront, and/or for a certain percentage to be paid at key milestones of the project, especially if it is a project that spans a longer time and/or involves larger sums of fees (whatever that means to you)!

With others

• When approaching people for a project

  • • 📃 Explicitly articulate in a shared document what the project (and you) can or cannot accommodate, and the reasoning where possible e.g. you will be able to respect boundaries around timeouts, but rehearsals can only take place on Sundays due to X person’s availability; the project can provide hybrid formats as needed

❣️ Having things down in writing is helpful for people who may need more time to process their thoughts, and also for easy referencing (because most people have terrible memories!)

• 💬 Take the initiative to articulate, as appropriate, how the project takes into account your own boundaries and support needs, as a way of modelling and inviting people to express their own boundaries and preferences; but also

• ❓ Explicitly ask people about their boundaries and preferences!

  • • If people are familiar with this, this invitation can be done more generically e.g. ‘please share any boundaries or access and support needs you may have’

    • However, for people who are less familiar with these concepts / when in doubt about people’s familiarity with these concepts, do consider giving short explanations for e.g. what kinds of boundaries people might want to highlight for the project, or perhaps even direct them to this resource!

• 📃 It can be helpful to collect people’s boundaries in a single document, so everyone can be mindful of other people’s needs and concerns, but this should also be open for discussion as some people might have privacy and confidentiality concerns

❣️ A word doc may be the easiest, but it can also be fun to play with Jamboard or other platforms you’re already using for your project! Part of having fun with the format of this document is about making it feel more casual, so people are comfortable updating their boundaries in it or updating the group directly!

Other notes

• 🤔 In entering into a new project, if you feel like the organisers/institution is dismissive or resistant to talking about boundaries and preferences, this might be a good point for you to ask yourself a) if the role is truly worth taking up, even if there is the chance of a potential fallout; and b) if you have sufficient capacity and resources around you (people, financial etc.) that you would be able to rely on for support in the event of a fallout with the organisers/institution

  • • If it’s a yes and you decide to take up the role, something you can do for yourself is to approach 1-2 trusted individuals to tell them that you are taking up this project, and to ask if they might be open to be ‘on standby’ to support you as needed, either as a listening ear, or to step in as an advocate for you in the process.

    • Even if everything in the project goes smoothly, it can still be helpful to have people with whom you can chat and process how the project is going! And if anything goes wrong, you have less to explain and contextualise to these individuals when trying to address the issue!

• 🌼 On the flipside, if you are inviting people to enter a project and they seem dismissive or resistant to talking about boundaries and preferences, we encourage you to be patient! Care is unfortunately still a new idea in Singapore’s context, but you can consider directing them to this resource or reaching out to CITRUS practices at care.intimacy@gmail.com for facilitation support (:

  • • If it’s a very strong reaction though, that’s also a helpful sign that maybe this person wouldn’t be a good fit for you and the project - which is also always good to know before committing to work together!

For yourself

• Over the course of the project + at the end of the project!

  • • ✍🏽 Consciously setting aside reflection time!

      • • It can be a good discipline to take 10-15mins to think through and/or write down reflections about the dynamics of the project and changes (if any) about your boundaries/preferences at a) significant milestones within the project e.g. after the first draft of the script/choreography etc., at the end of the project, and/or b) if your life circumstances have changed

        • ☕ If you’re someone who processes better by talking though, an alternative could be thinking ahead to set up a conversation with someone you trust at the midpoint and endpoint of the project

With others

• Over the course of the project + at the end of the project!

  • • Ideally, the organisers would be able to offer a structure for the check-ins, but if not, it can be helpful to prepare for the check-in by thinking through the following questions:

      • • How am I feeling about the project?

        • What is working well for me in the project?

        • What is not working as well for me in the project? Do I have any thoughts/suggestions that might help to address these issues?

❣️ If there are check-ins but you don’t actually feel safe to speak your mind, we would suggest that you look up the section on Addressing Harm, to help think through what can be done to support your safety and wellbeing in the project!

• • • ✋ Plan ahead to set aside reflection time for the entire team at significant milestones of the project e.g. after the first draft of the script/choreography etc., at the end of the project, so that there is ‘protected’ time for people to share thoughts and concerns about how the project is supporting their needs and boundaries

      • • If concerns can be addressed when they are still perceived as ‘not a big deal’, this can help to minimise issues from escalating and becoming a bigger problem in future within the project! These can also be really helpful learning points for everyone in the project to hear about, so as to perhaps pre-emptively address them in future projects!

❣️ Explicitly inviting people to share their discomfort, and also explicitly thanking people for sharing will do a lot in putting people at ease to share what they really think about the project and the process to date.

This being said, having an attitude of embracing opinions and thoughts that are different from yours (or at least trying as much as possible to do so!) is something that needs to be observed and modelled throughout the project for people to really take these check-ins seriously.

❣️ These check-ins are also best done over food and drinks, and in more casual / informal settings!

In shorter and/or more straightforward projects, whatever this means to you, this could look like setting aside 15-20mins during sessions; in longer and/or more complex projects with more core team members, this might look like setting aside a full 1-2hours / dedicating one session to just do this check-in!

❣️ To take into account different people’s processing speeds and also preferred modes of processing, do also consider providing various options for people e.g. responding in-person / on the spot options, but also over mediums like text or email / over a predefined window of time.

• 🌈💖 Where requests are made of you during the project that you are unsure or uncomfortable about, remember that there are many possibilities between an enthusiastic ‘yes’ and an outright ‘no’. For instance, ‘no, but’ is a helpful way to negotiate consent and keep the conversation going, where you could say ‘no’ to what is being asked of you, but offer other possibilities to address the issue!

• Asking for interest

  • • For a project that has already been designed

      • • "Hi there, I would like to invite you to be a [role] in my [project type] titled [project title]. The details of the project are as follows:

          • • Scope of responsibilities for [role]:

            • Dates and Time:

            • Venue:

            • Payment amount, payment schedule and payment method:

            • If this role sounds like something you would be interested in, do reply via [contact method] latest by [date] and I will [next steps/follow up].

            • If you have any questions, concerns about the project or access and support needs, please let me know via [contact method].

            • Thank you!

• Clarifying/asking questions about details of project

  • • "Hi there, may I ask what the _____________________ are for this project?"

      • • Scope of responsibilities for [role]

        • Dates and durations

        • Venue

        • Payment amount, payment schedule and payment method

        • anything else that you are concerned about, including but not limited to: who else is involved, access needs, communication methods etc.

    • "Could I clarify what you meant by... [something unclear/vague that they said]?"

• Talking about expectations, consequences and alternatives

  • • "Because one of the conditions for the funding of this project is [expectation from funding body], please let us know as early as possible if you need to leave/adjust your commitment level with the project, so that we can discuss alternatives or inform the funding body early."

    • "As a student in this class, you will need to pass this subject in order to graduate. In the case that it becomes difficult for you to attend classes or to catch up with the class, please let the teacher know so that they will be able to direct you to another class/set up remedial classes/find alternative assessment methods."

• Giving feedback (for tangible things and behaviours with clear examples)

  • • "I like... I wish... I wonder..."

      • • “I like” is a starting point for what went well or what is positive about an idea, a thing or a behaviour.

        • “I wish” is a starting point for what could be done differently/improved.

        • “I wonder” can be a starting point for questions that are still unanswered, and ideas.

• Giving emotional support

  • • Affirming joy

      • • "Wow! You look happy! What happened today?"

        • "Yay! That's so great!"

        • "Cool! I'm happy for you too!"

    • Expressing concern

      • • "You look quite down, are you in the mood to talk about it with me?"

        • "Hey there, are you feeling okay? Do you need any kind of support?"

    • Active listening

      • • "I hear that you're feeling frustrated because [repeat what they said to you in your own words]."

        • "What do you mean when you say.... [something that they said that you want to clarify/are curious about]?"

        • Pay attention to what they are saying instead of letting thoughts run in your own head

        • Keep an open posture, nod occasionally, refrain from putting on a blank or annoyed facial expression

    • If you are not in the mood to emotionally support someone (i.e. feeling depleted or preoccupied etc.)

      • • "I hear that you're feeling upset, but I don't think I have the capacity to listen well right now. Could we talk about this later/tomorrow/another time?"

• Talking about harm

  • • You are talking to someone who has experienced harm

      • • "Are you safe?"

        • "Would you like to talk about what happened?"

        • "What kind of support do you need?"

        • "Would you like to know what choices you have to report the harm?"

        • "Would you like me to accompany you to [hospital/police station/institutional authorities]?" "Would you like me to report it for you?"

    • Talking about harm that has happened to you

      • • "I need support/someone to talk to, are you able to come find me/talk with me?"

        • "I've experienced something bad and I don't want to talk about it. Could you just sit/eat/stay with me?"

        • "I'd prefer to not think about it for now, could you talk about/do something else (unrelated to the harm) with me?"

• Boundaries and preferences

  • • "🟢 Ideally, I prefer having a few days’ notice about things, but 🟠 in the case of emergencies, I am okay with responding to messages within a day, 🔴 However, I am not okay with repeated last-minute notices or changes."

    • "I prefer communicating over email. If there are urgent matters, I am okay with using Telegram for messaging. I am not okay with using Instagram for work communications."

    • "If you will be late or cannot attend at the last minute, please let me know as early as possible. I am okay if you inform me (that you will be late/not coming), but I am not okay if there is no update and our agreed time to meet has passed."

• Consent

  • • Asking for consent: “May I?” “Can I?” “Will you?” “Do you want to?” “Is this okay?”

    • Some examples of what giving or not giving consent might look like:

      • • No consent - Closed body language, eyes looking elsewhere, frowning, jaw muscles clenched, shifting away

        • Consent - Open body language, eye contact maintained, eyebrows raised or relaxed, smiling

    • Some examples of what giving or not giving consent might sound like:

      • • No consent - unsure tone, saying “No.” “Not now.” “Not like that, I’d prefer…”

        • Consent - relatively firm tone, enthusiastic tone, saying “Yes.” “Yes, and…”

Read Me First:

Hi! We're glad you are here. This section on Addressing Harm describes what harmful situations in the arts workplace might be like, how to identify them and seek help addressing harm. You might be reading this for self-improvement or looking for some answers to specific questions you have. We hope you will find portions of this of use to you.

It is possible that while going through the resource, readers may recognise that they are/were involved in a harmful situation or someone they know is/was involved in a harmful situation. Feelings of sadness, anger, guilt or shame might arise. Feelings of relief, peace and hope might also arise.

We offer these suggestions for going through the resource:

• Have a note-taking device on hand to record feelings and ideas, as a form of reflection and check-in

• Schedule a check-in with yourself every 15min of reading/browsing

• When needed, take a break, go to the decompression space (hyperlink) or stop reading

• For added support, have someone you trust go through the resource together with you

• If you experience distress or changes to your eating and sleeping patterns, do seek support with a counsellor, therapist, or other trained professionals

Broadly speaking, harm is when there is damage done to a person's rights, physical or mental well-being. The harm might have happened in the past or might be on-going.

Harm can be caused by an individual, a group or an institution. Oftentimes, we have to look to the environment too to notice the factors that contribute to harm (eg. a workplace lacking in boundaries). We may find that we are contributing/contributed to harm in an arts workplace, or may be the ones who are causing/caused harm. It is worthwhile to note that there will always be some extent of harm in society, life and inevitably, the arts workplace. Rather than focusing on eradicating harm completely, which is impossible, we can focus on reducing harm and recognising harm and our role in it can be a first step.

The extent and impact of harm varies, and it can be confronting to name something we experienced or have done as harm. Regardless of the extent and nature of harm, there are ways to care for ourselves as well as those around us by figuring out how to address it, and seeking help and healing in the process.

In some situations, we may be able to take steps to prevent harm from occurring or reducing the harm. See the "If you..." sections below for support in addressing harm.

When there is a significant difference in power or experience in the field, there often is a risk of harm occurring if the one in power is not conscious of their influence and position.

Here are some examples of a harmful situation and what they might look like:

• There is a sequence in a performance that is risky, and might cause physical and emotional discomfort. That in itself might not be inherently harmful. However, if safety precautions and due diligence to ensure the performers’ well-being are not sufficiently considered, and there is real risk of injury or damage, then it is considered a harmful situation that needs to be addressed.
  
  At times, this might make us feel guilty, or doubt our capability as a practitioner. But we have to remember that it is a basic human right to feel and be safe; it is not a reflection of one’s skills to be able to tolerate a situation that is harmful to our own wellbeing.

• An arts worker repeatedly inviting a co-worker/collaborator/workplace acquaintance to their home, along with sexually suggestive messages or expectations. If the invitations seem innocent at the start, but involve sexual requests and expectations later, sexual grooming might be occuring.

• Arts workplaces that dismiss personal and family needs (eg. timely salary, personal time, privacy), and demand or insinuate that the art or the work should always come first. In these instances, boundaries have been crossed, at the expense of the short term and long term safety and dignity of the arts workers.

During a disagreement, we might feel hurt that the person we are speaking to does not seem to agree with us. The sense of disappointment and disconnect might bring discomfort, but it is not harmful. Not all discomfort indicates the presence of harm, though discomfort is an important invitation to examine if there is a risk of harm, in addition to the hurt that we may feel.

Further reading:

https://www.boundariesbooks.com/blogs/boundaries-blog/how-to-discern-hurt-from-harm-in-a-relationship

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/11-red-flags-gaslighting-in-relationship

Types of Harm

Here, we give an overview of harmful behaviours that might happen in an arts workplace:

• Emotional and Psychological Harm & Abuse

Some harm and abuse are not as easily seen externally. In the workplace, they can present in the form of: threats, being left alone, humiliation, intimidation, verbal abuse, bullying, blaming, constant criticism, controlling behaviour, depriving contact with others. Some telltale signs are if the arts worker is constantly made to feel guilty though they did not do anything wrong, or if the arts worker is often being gaslighted, i.e. made to question their own reality, memory or perceptions. Arts workers who are suffering from emotional and psychological harm and abuse may regularly feel: anxious, afraid, upset, overly confused, behaviour change, withdrawn, etc.

For further reading:

https://www.adultprotectionsouthlanarkshire.org.uk/info/69/emotional_abuse_or_psychological_harm

https://artswellbeingcollective.com.au/collective-wisdom/preventing-workplace-bullying/

• Sexual Harassment & Misconduct

Sexual harassment is defined by AWARE as offensive, unwanted and unwelcome behaviour of a sexual nature. Workplace sexual harassment can occur between colleagues, with clients, suppliers or peers from the industry, and might happen physically in the office or in other work-related activities. It might be non-consensual repeated or singular verbal, visual or physical acts that cause someone to feel uncomfortable and unsafe. Sometimes, there are myths that persist, eg. a boss who seems kind would not do such a thing, men do not suffer from sexual harassment at work, sexual favors are needed to do well in a particular industry, sexual coercion between colleagues is a private matter, etc. It is important to recognise sexual harassment for what it is and seek help and support.

Even if the arts worker does not feel harassed, there might still be sexual misconduct happening, which points at a pattern of sexual predation or violation of company policies and industry practices. For example, a person with more experience or a higher rank using their power to coerce or groom younger colleagues for intimate, romantic or sexual relationships.

Workplace sexual harassment and misconduct present in different ways.

Read more here:

https://www.aware.org.sg/training/wsh-site/

https://www.ricemedia.co/books-actually-young-women-speak-up/

https://www.malaysiakini.com/news/509733

• Physical Harm & Unsafe Workplaces

Arts workers are entitled to workplaces where they are safe from physical harm and that are free of health and safety hazards. Where a reasonable level of physical risk is accepted and agreed upon, there should be risk assessments done and measures to minimise risk. If there is someone who is physically harmful or abusive at the workplace, or if not enough is done to remove and minimise workplace hazards, the arts worker can and should seek help and support.

In the age of Covid-19 safe measures management, workplaces need to keep up-to-date with health advisories and regulations too. This is to minimise workers’ exposure to the virus and lower the chance of a workplace outbreak.

For further reading:

https://www.mom.gov.sg/workplace-safety-and-health

https://www.saic.edu/life-at-saic/environmental-health/arts

https://www.worksafe.vic.gov.au/arts

Employment Malpractice

Sometimes, harmful behaviours involve employment malpractice as well. There are many forms of employment and contractual malpractice or behaviours that violate employment practices required by MOM. They relate to aspects of a workplace contract such as payment, leave, disputes, workplace injuries, cost-savings measures, termination, etc. Workers are protected by the Employment Act (full time, part time, temporary, contract) or the Employment of Part-Time Employees Regulation (work less than 35 hours/week).

For further reading:

https://www.mom.gov.sg/employment-practices

https://www.mom.gov.sg/employment-practices/part-time-employment

https://www.lawsocprobono.org/Documents/Advocates%20for%20the%20Arts.pdf

Identifying harm in arts workplaces or settings can be straightforward at times, and at other times, complicated and confusing.

An arts worker might feel uncertain or confused about whether:

• There are harmful behaviours in their arts workplace

• They are harmed / experiencing harmful behaviours

• They contributed to their harm / the harmful behaviours

• There are ways to reduce or remove the harmful behaviours

• There are ways to heal or recover from the harm

• There are ways to report the harm

• There are ways to get restitution

• The behaviours are considered criminal or not

If someone suspects harm done or harmful behaviours in their arts workplace, and would like to do something to reduce harm, they can certainly seek clarity or help and support. This is true, even if they feel they might have contributed to the harm / harmful behaviours. Taking the steps to understand and reduce harm may be accompanied by self-awareness, self-reflection and self-improvement. There may be emotions that come along with taking these steps to reduce harm, all of which are normal:

• Eg. guilt - for taking steps to reduce harm; steps that may result in consequences for individuals or groups

• Eg. sadness - when recognising and accepting that there was indeed harm / harmful behaviours

• Eg. anger - when recognising injustice or complacency

Potential indicators of harm (Warning Signs of Harm?):

Harm can look differently from context to context. It can be helpful to be aware of potentially dangerous situations and behaviours, and what leads up to it before someone experiences harm.

Gaslighting (If this title is removed and "gaslighting" as a term is integrated into the points below, then maybe this section can have more warning signs of harm, besides gaslighting, eg. what we might see in the behaviour of an arts worker - if content feedback panelists have any thoughts on this, that would be helpful!)

To manipulate someone using psychological means into questioning their own sanity and reality. The confusion that an experience of being gaslit can make it difficult for you to speak up or even identify the possibility of harm.

This can look like:

• Someone denying they ever said something, even though you have proof.
  This makes you doubt your experience of reality, and can be very destabilising as you start to question what is real and what is not. Even if you don’t have concrete proof of the exact words being said, if their response is not asking clarifying questions to reach an agreement, and instead respond by saying you are “making things up” or that you “don’t know what you are saying”, that is something to be taken note of.
  
  For example, it was previously agreed upon that using your personal trauma as material for an artwork is not something you’d want to do, and is a boundary that is not to be crossed. However, midway through the project they claim that the conversation did not happen the way you remember, and insist upon crossing that boundary despite noting your discomfort.
  

• Someone’s actions not matching their words
  It can be a case where a person is using words that appear caring and respectful on the surface, but their actions or tone of voice does not seem to align. This can be particularly damaging because the words uttered do not match how one is experiencing them, and creates immense confusion.
  
  For example, a project mate repeatedly saying that they respect differences, but they repeatedly put down any opinions that do not align with their own. Or they may say that they agree to disagree, but make you feel lesser for having a different opinion by mocking it, or by rallying other people to isolate you.
  

• You feel particularly confused and drained after engaging with a situation or person
  Gaslighting is not always obvious, and is usually a gradual process. One indicator that you might be experiencing emotional harm of this sort is when you consistently feel exhausted and doubtful of your own stances after talking with someone.

It can be confronting to consider that you have been harmed, especially if the person harming you is close to you or someone who holds a good reputation in the industry. Something to note is that we may tend to downplay or dismiss how we are affected, due to reasons such as being able to understand where the other person is coming from, or if we have been used to being treated a certain way. We might also feel an overwhelming sense of anger, grief or disbelief when we realise that harm has occurred.

During these times, it can be helpful to first take care of your own wellbeing before continuing to process what has happened or is happening. There is no rush, and it is completely okay to take your time in this process.

NOTE: If you feel overwhelmed at any point, you can head over to this interactive self-care guide before proceeding:

https://philome.la/jace_harr/you-feel-like-shit-an-interactive-self-care-guide/play/index.html

Now that you are feeling relatively more settled, here are some questions that might be helpful for you to think through, or talk through with someone you feel safe with. Have a piece of paper or laptop with you so you can write your answers and thoughts out. This flow of questions can also be adapted for when you are supporting someone who is/has experience with harm.

The questions are organised in a way that helps you ease into it, though you are completely free to consider them in any order or pace that makes sense to you:

1. How safe do you feel right now?

   • Safety may feel like a sense of groundedness, feeling like you are not in imminent danger (both perceived and real).

2. If you do not feel safe right now, what might you be able to do to feel a bit safer?

   • Thinking back to instances where you experienced similar emotions, what has helped you feel safer or cope?

   • Possible things: taking a deep breath, moving to a space where you feel like you have more privacy and safety, texting a friend, taking a short walk

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a visual representation of a break

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3. When you think about the harmful situation or person, what are the emotions that arise?

4. Are there any persons that you feel safe or comfortable around, that you would want to reach out to for support?

   • A person that feels safe could be someone who you feel like you can speak freely about how you are feeling and thinking, who will not cast judgement or push for clarity before you are ready to share. They can also be someone who is able to hold gentle space for murkiness when you are not sure what you feel or think about things.

5. How long have you been in the situation, and if you are still in it, when might you be able to disengage with it?

   • What are some safety plans you can come up with if you are still in the midst of the situation?

     • E.g., If you want to exit the location in which harm occurs, what are some things you can do to ensure that you can leave?

     • Are there people you can reach out to to help if you are in an emergency?

     • When you are feeling highly distressed, what might be helpful for you in that moment? Are there ways to have those things close by if you know that you are entering a stressful situation?

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a visual representation of a break

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6. How have your emotional and physical states been shifting over the course of the past week?

7. Were you in a similar situation before? How was it like for you then?

   • What are the similarities and differences between this and that previous situation?

   • What were your tendencies in that previous situation?

   • Do you tend towards broadcasting this info to others? Might you tend to confront the person? Do you tend towards ignoring the situation or dismissing it?

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a visual representation of a break

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8. When you think about the situation, are there things that you feel like you want to do? This need not be realistic or probable, but simply for you to get a sense of where you are and where you might want to be.

   • Of the things that you listed out, what are some of the actions you actually want to take? Might there be a person you can talk through some of these things with?

   • If there are none, what is something nice that you can do for yourself right now? It could be as simple as having a snack, or a shower, or a short walk.

9. How do you feel right now, after going through some of these questions?

   • How safe do you feel?

   • Is there a difference between how you were feeling and now?

These questions, again, are meant to be suggestions. Feel free to adapt them as you deem fit, and take regular breaks instead of trying to answer them all at once!

[Anecdote will be added in its own side box: ""My employer instructed me to work in a way that was against the Covid-19 safe measure guidelines. She claimed she had special approval from the authorities, and that if I did not abide by her instructions, I was not a team player and would be prematurely terminated. I went to the relevant authorities to fact check and found that there was no special approval given to this company. Then I found out from MOM that my employer needed to give me a termination letter and pay me till my last day of work. I was able to speak up to my employer, who then kept me employed and paid me till my last day."]

Where there is malpractice or suspicions of malpractice, arts workers can approach these channels for clarifications and help:

• Ministry of Manpower

They have officers on hand to help clarify any uncertainties about expected workplace practices, as well as behaviour that warrants a report and investigation. You will need to indentify yourself to MOM if you put in a report, but they can assist in keeping your identify confidential in the investigation if you inform them to do so.

• Arts Resource Hub

Arts Resource Hub was setup by the National Arts Council to support arts freelancers. Though they do not specifically have any watchdog nor quality control functions, they may be able to help link you with relevant channels of help.

• Dancers Advocacy Group

DAG is a working group comprising volunteers from the professional dance community, formed to advocate for the welfare, rights and sustainable careers of professional dance artists and educators in Singapore. In some cases, they may be able to function as an intermediary to advocate for safety and needs of dance artists and educators.

• National Instructors and Coaches Association

The National Instructors and Coaches Association (NICA) is an NTUC-affiliated association which was formed following an NTUC announcement to extend its reach to the freelancer community who are coaches and/or instructors in the fields of sports, outdoor adventures/learning, fitness, wellness, visual arts and performing arts.

• Meet The People Sessions (MPS)

MPS can be helpful for arts workers who have tried other channels to get help or support in situations of harm, but need additional help being taken seriously. MPS is a political device - do check which Member of Parliament (MP) is in charge of your constituency and whether you are comfortable approaching them with your concerns.

If you are someone supporting others (eg. friends, co-workers) who have experienced/ are experiencing harm, please also refer to the materials in the tab above - "If You Are Someone Experiencing Harm".

Here are some tips for supporting someone who has experienced harm:

• Ensure you yourself are safe and feel safe to do the support work

  • • If you feel worried, anxious or unsure, check in with your emotions and why you are feeling that way

    • Have a conversation with the person you are supporting about how the both of you can feel safe in this process

    • If you decide you are not able to do the support work, recommend someone or an agency that can

    • For harm relating to the arts workplace, you can also reach out to CITRUS

• Refer to first responder approaches that offer guidance on how to speak to someone who has experienced harm, and may be talking about the harm for the first time

  • • https://www.utas.edu.au/__data/assets/pdf_file/0016/1204153/First-Responder-Protocol.pdf

• If you are the only person supporting them, ensure that you are also supported in the course of doing so, keeping in mind your capacity

• https://www.creative-interventions.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/CI-Toolkit-Final-ENTIRE-Aug-2020-new-cover.pdf

There are instances where we learn of harm through the whisper network, or by witnessing it unfold in our surroundings. However, we might not have a close relationship with the people involved, or feel like it is not possible to intervene. In such situations, you might feel a range of emotions (stuck, helplessness, guilt, frustration, etc.), depending on your position in the organisation or relationship with the person causing harm.

While we might not feel equipped to intervene or take action, there are some processes you can partake on your own or with someone you trust, that might be supportive for you. It might be helpful to write them down, or take some time to journal with these prompts:

3. • How do you feel when you are in proximity with the individual or circumstance?

   • Are you at risk of being harmed in this situation?

   • Who might be someone you feel comfortable with and trust, who you can share your concerns with? Are there other people who have witnessed the harmful behaviour, who you are able to make sense of the situation together as peers?

   • What are some of your considerations or impulses when it comes to the individual or circumstance? Might there be a sense that you are unable to extract yourself from the situation, and if so, what are some reasons you feel that way?

Often, we feel hesitant when it comes to broaching the subject due to a wide range of reasons such as not wanting to "spread gossip" or not wanting to risk our own safety. However, it might increase feelings of isolation and frustration when you keep it to yourself, and the harmful situation might escalate further. It might be helpful to think about who are some people you feel comfortable with and trust, that you might want to speak with about the matter. Some useful framing questions or conversation starters can be:

• I've been noticing that XXX tends to [short description of a behaviour you noticed], and I have been feeling uncomfortable with it. I'm not sure what to make of it, and I'm wondering if you have also noticed similar things as I am?

• I'm working with XXX on this project, and while I have not felt uncomfortable, it seems that it would be difficult to bring anything up if I were to disagree with them. How has your experience with them been like?

• I'm feeling worried about XXX and how they are being treated in the workplace/by an individual. It seems like they might be in a compromising situation. I am feeling quite confused about how to navigate this. Do you have any thoughts about this?

It is often difficult, painful or maybe alarming when someone recognises they have caused harm, or are accused of having caused harm. You might experience strong emotions such as: guilt, shame, resentment, anger, indignation, confusion and/or grief. In such an instance it can be helpful to allow yourself the space to sit with these emotions, and to reach out to a person you feel safe with to parse through the extent and kind of harm you realised you have done, or are told have been done. The fact that you are here is a first step, and it's important to further expand what you might want to do to mediate or address the harm caused.

This is a question flow that might be helpful as you reflect about your behaviour and situation:

1. What are the behaviour and actions that were brought up? What might be some harmful aspects of these, and who might be affected by these?

2. How did you come to realise that your behaviour or actions are harmful?

• If you have realised this on your own, or through realising that people are reacting a certain way around you (e.g., avoiding you, not speaking up against you), it can be helpful to list reasons of how that might be so honestly on your own, while mindful of being defensive or indignant. After which, who might be someone you feel will be honest to you, that you can continue this process with?

• If it is brought to your attention by someone else, AND if that person is not the one who has been harmed by you, it might be helpful to check in with them to gain clarity as you process your own harm.

• Refrain from asking the person you have harmed to explain how you have been harmful, particularly if they have expressed discomfort in communicating with you.

3. What might the people your behaviour has affected need in this moment, and in the future?

• 1. 1. • It could look like giving them space away from you and/or the situation, or listening to them openly and receptively if they want to share further the harm they have experienced, or you taking concrete steps to change your behaviour, or something else altogether.

4. Are there any other persons who are aware of your behaviour you can speak to, who you trust and feel safe around?

3. • It might bring up feelings of defensiveness when people name instances in which you might have been harmful. In such an instance, it can be helpful to take a step back to center yourself, and to remind yourself why you are addressing this in the first place. This is why it's important to approach people you trust, so that you can feel safe that they are not simply attacking you for the sake of it.

   • What are the power dynamics between you and people who might potentially be aware of your behaviour? Are you of a higher standing in terms of influence or experience?
     
     It might be helpful to first check in with yourself before checking in with another person to ensure that you will not risk causing further harm, or if you are subconsciously reaching out in a vengeful or bitter manner.

5. Is the behaviour and/or situation still ongoing, recently occurred (less than a year ago), or occurred more than a year back?

3. • If it is still ongoing, what are the steps you can take to reduce further harm?

   • If it is recent, are there parts of the mentioned behaviour still existing, and how might you check in with yourself and those who have felt harmed by you to ensure safety and accountability?

   • If it has occurred more than a year back, how has your behaviour shifted from then till now? What are some steps you might take to mitigate the harmful effects of your previous behaviour?

This might be overwhelming and you might experience a range of emotions while confronting aspects of harm. It's okay to take the time you need to process how that might have happened and what happened, before you decide what active steps you might want to take for yourself to prevent future harm. In the meantime, it can be helpful to seek professional support in the form of a therapist or counsellor to help hold the space for you as you make sense of everything that has unfolded or is unfolding. This is especially important if you are someone holding a position of power, and the people in your immediate circle are also implicated and might not feel like they are able to support you!