Reflection

Ever since I was a little girl I have remembered writing in a little journal. Every year I would get a new one. One ready to be filled out, in which I would write down anything I thought was important to document. The thought of someone reading what I wrote made me nervous, mainly because my writing wasn't very good.

I stopped writing in my journals when I entered high school, probably because I had a lot more homework at school. Writing essays for classes was my least favorite thing, they seemed endless and the beginning was the hardest part. I often thought about going back to writing, but for some reason, I just couldn't get around to it.

Writing represented something important to me, like a part of what I meant to be. Writing represented a liberating feeling; it was a way to organize what I had in mind and then set it free.

When I entered college, I still had the feeling of how difficult it was to write essays. Because of homework, projects, and work, among other things, I still didn't write in a journal again. On the one hand, what prevented me was time, but I consider that my main impediment was the fear of not being able to write with the same emotion as before. In the spring of 2024, I took two honors classes, Intellectual Traditions: The Experience of Being: Human Experience Through Story Telling and American Voices. The first class was taught by Dr. Sahar Al-Shoubaki, and her passion and determination for the topics she taught was very inspiring and made the class even more interesting. She told us in class about the Writing for Peace contest and encouraged us to participate by submitting an essay.

At first, I was hesitant. I had never participated in such contests and the idea of ​​someone reading my writing made me feel somewhat embarrassed. Even though I hadn't made up my mind, I started writing the essay, as a way of reconnecting with myself. I was surprised by the fluidity with which I wrote the first draft. It had been a long time since I had written about myself, and even longer in such a profound way. When I finished the essay, I decided to send it, and I was surprised when I was told that it would be published. Having my first published writing filled me with a feeling of joy, and the process of creating it motivated me to write more often. 

In social studies class, I met Dr. Cindy Fierros, an amazing teacher who also taught the topics in her class with passion and dedication. I learned so much in her class. It helped me get a broader view of what was going on around me and helped me feel much closer to my culture. Although it may sound a little strange, I had never been aware of the country in which I was born and raised. I knew I was Peruvian, but it wasn't something I repeated constantly when I lived there. It was when I emigrated to the United States that I became more aware of it since it was present every time I introduced myself. 

For the American Identity class, we had to present a project that sought to answer what American identity meant to us. It was a very difficult process for me because honestly, I didn't feel American. I tried to look for inspiration in many places, but nothing came to my mind that could answer that question. Once again, writing was what helped me organize the ideas I had in mind. I decided to write a poem that would include various aspects of everything I had learned in class and also outside of it. I found inspiration in people I had met personally, people who told me about their history in the country and what it meant to them. I also decided to include historical figures that could be put into context. 

I loved the final result. It was a very personal thing that I wrote and represented a process of self-discovery that I never thought could happen. I read the poem in class, and although I was nervous about doing so, I felt happy to be able to share that moment with people who were also working on answering that question. I submitted the poem to Folio magazine, and it was accepted and published in the fall of 2024, thus becoming my second publication. I was invited to the magazine's launch party and read the poem at the event. 

Both writings meant a lot to me. They helped me grow, heal, and move on, something that for a long time I thought would be impossible. I hope to be able to publish more writings again, sharing them with people was very comforting.