Mystery Of Life

What makes life so complicated for some but easy for others? Let's solve the mystery of life!

Disclaimer: Life is complicated as we know it & it is very hard to explain many facets of it, as everything is connected somehow and that makes things complex. So please don’t judge us when we divert a little while explaining things in order to solve the mystery of life. :)

Close your eyes and ask yourself –

1. What is life? Does it only mean taking birth, surviving, and then dying?

2. How my life looks like? Will I be remembered for good after I am gone?

3. How is my life progressing? Does it even helping others along the way, or it is just focusing on itself?

Let us leave this earth and fly ourselves far beyond in space from where we can see the earth and most importantly, our reflections on earth. We would be looking at our & other people’s lives from a distance. We would then realize how our actions create a cascading effect on our & other people’s lives and how it shapes the lives of everyone connected as we move forward. Being in this position, we could sense how little our presence is on earth and how other people pose an impact on everything we do in our lives while giving us an understanding of how interconnected our lives are. This distance will give a different perspective to what we are doing on earth and would help us to think about how we could take our lives moving forward.

As already explained here, we, and our lives, are the result of whom we associate with, whom we interact with, who we are friends with & whom we keep close to. All these experiences give us enough information for our minds to process and build our thinking and persona. Therefore, our critical thinking, problem-solving, & decision-making abilities depend on the people that surround us. We do what we think, we think what we are fed up with, i.e. data & information. Our thoughts create energy, our actions create vibration. Both of them propagate & creates subsequent thoughts & actions, either in us or to others. This in turn cascades and our life transcends. Many call it as “Karma”.

Data & Information --> Thoughts --> Action --> Energy & Vibration --> Impacting your and other’s thoughts & actions --> Cascades and creates new Data and Information

Our life is built by the people we meet, we interact with, build relationships with, and how we react to & display our character to any adverse situation.

Moving forward, we have, many a time, heard someone saying that ‘Every situation has two sides of it’, or ‘There are several shades to life/situation, not just black & white’, or ‘Somebody looked at the bigger picture and others didn’t’. So what do they all mean? Why somebody is able to see different or multiple sides to every situation? Why not all are able to see a situation from every angle? What stops them from doing it? Why are many ignored from this fact? Why for someone life is a happy journey even in adversity while a troublesome journey, for someone, even after having all the pleasures of life? Why are some financially rich yet sad, and some are financially poor yet happy and enjoy life to its fullest?

Life is mysterious in its own way. We could never predict what life has to offer. We could only play by its rules and happily accept whatever it gives us. The only hack to life is to think positively and do good things for ourselves and for others (refer to the picture above).

Activity: Take the 9-Day Transformation Challenge

Read 1: How being alone changed me? What can you learn from being alone? 5 important suggestions!

Read 2: Who is my Lucky Charm? Where to find my Lucky Charm?

Read 3: What does Soul Satisfaction mean to you?

Read 4: #livingwithaliving

Read 5: How to Celebrate Life?

What is Life?

Is life just about surviving? Or is it about leaving a legacy or about being remembered for good?

Taking birth, Getting educated, Getting a job, Getting married, Having children, Getting them educated, Getting them married, Spending time with their children, Surviving/Enjoying life, Dying.

The same process is followed by many people, the same would be followed by their children and then their children. Life goes in a spiral nature for everyone.

Is this what life is all about? Is this what we have signed up for? Think over it.

...

"You ride an auto-rickshaw of 3 wheels - MONEY, SEX, POWER, driven by DESIRE on a bumpy path called LIFE until the gas runs out.

Then you walk alone with your two legs: INTROSPECTION & REALISATION."

Relationship & Vibes

Relationships between people create energies around them. If the relationship is good, the energy will be positive, and if the relationship is sour, the energy will be negative.

Sometimes, it may be concluded that as the relationship is good between two people, therefore, energies must be positive between and around them, however, it is not true most of the time, as people tend to fake their behavior in front of others. So even if the relationship that apparently seems good, the energy around them may be negative. People involved in the relationship may not feel the good vibes when that other person is around. That's the origin of negative energies.

Let's decode this:

It is not that the other person is creating negative energies, it is the behavior, of both the people in the relationship, that plays an important role in defining the energies. And moreover, what you think of the other person plays an important role in that. If you respect or love the other person, you may feel positive energies around them but it may or may not be true for the other person involved in that relationship.

The other person can be very best in his/her behavior but it may not seem true to you and that's what creates negative energies in the relationship.

4 pillars of Support in life

Family, Friend, Life Partner, You - only these will be there with you till you die, rest will act as a moving breeze in your life.

Jealousy

Your life is beautiful, in its own way, until you start looking at others' life. Envy can either be the biggest motivator for your success or can be the biggest reason for your unhappiness. Jealousy happens when you start to compare your life to others. You forget to understand that everyone's life is different in its own ways.

Everyone has:

their own priorities
their own struggles of life
their own aspirations
their own lifestyle
their own thoughts
their own choices
their own needs, wants, & desires
their own LIFE JOURNEY

which could be totally different from yours. The experiences they had in the past have developed them into what they are today and the same applies to you and to your life as well. We all have different paths in life - started at different points and will end at different points.

Society

If you start doing things according to the wishes and convenience of the people around you, you will be respected, valued, and listened to. This way they feel no threat to their existence and command on you as long as you are behaving as per their biased state of mind and expectations. But once you start doing things against their liking, they will start detesting you. That's how the majority of non-utopian society works.

The problem with society is that it looks at the one side of the coin and believes that it is the truth and wants everyone to believe that it is the only truth. And if you go against them, you will be outcasted.

Well, what about the other side of the story? What about a fair disagreement and discussion?

Moreover, our society is filled with people giving instructions and telling others what to do, ruining relationships if expectations are not met.

(Tip: Don't tell anybody what to do (you could only advise, without keeping any expectations) because people generally learn from their own failures and experiences, and that shapes their actions in the future.)

1% Community

The majority do not give a second thought to the socio-environmental problems as most people belong to the 'followers' category. They want someone to step up and do something about it. It is ingrained in the DNA of human beings - through evolution, through societal influences, and, most importantly, through education.

Once in a while, someone champions the cause and takes a bold step to step out and do something about it. When they do, the initial stage involves a lot of criticism from the 'followers', but then in the second stage, they start to follow them and worship him/her as their leader.

Be that 1%. Be that Leader.

Thinking leads to Growth

"If you are thinking, then you are growing."

Thinking leads to creating a vision.

Vision leads to working on that vision.

Hard work determines success/failure.

Success/Failure defines growth.

THINKING leads to GROWTH.

Thinking -> Vision -> Hardwork -> Success/Failure -> Growth

P.S: Purpose > Passion: Life Purpose is always greater than having a passion. Passion is temporary. Purpose is eternal. Purpose helps you define your vision which leads to growth as explained earlier.

Motivation is Overrated

Motivation may come and go but if you are disciplined and dedicated to your purpose then it won't stop you from achieving it. Motivation gives an initial push but discipline keeps you on your track to achieve your goal.

Motivation only exists as a noun. But discipline has a verb form. In other words, discipline is something you do, and choose to do; motivation is a thing that can come and go, which you cannot choose to do or control.

Furthermore: you are never “motivated” to be more disciplined. Discipline is useless if it’s not tied to the actions you want to be disciplined with.

So when you’re looking to change something in your life:

Let motivation inspire you, but don’t expect it to stick around.
Focus on building disciplined actions around that new thing.
Get specific in what “discipline” will look like for your specific goal.

"Motivation will fire the engine… at first. Discipline will keep you going when you think it’s out of gas."

Money vs Ethics

It is very hard to choose between money and ethics. If we want both, then we earn money but at a slow growth rate. Unethically we can earn money very fast. The only catch is that the money earned with unethical ways does not last long, but the money earned with ethical ways remain with us for a long time, meaning - with ethical ways, the continuity with which money is coming to us is sustained in the long run, whereas it is not the case with unethical ways.

Money earned with ethical ways comes with peace of mind, good family relationships, good friends, respect, and better life. While money earned with unethical ways carries fear, anxiety, no real societal relationships, disrespect, and shame along with it.

What would you choose?

Arranged Marriage

The very first step of an arranged marriage is flawed. You choose your partner based on external factors, like - facial appearance, bodily features, wealth, etc.

We neglect the very important internal qualities of a person - empathy, understanding, education, wisdom, nature, and compatibility - that are needed for a healthy marital relationship.

Marriage should not be a gamble. It is about your life and the life of the person you are going to get married to.

Understanding the person based on internal qualities should be prioritized before saying yes to anyone and yes to marriage.

Life is not always about comprises. If you have a choice, make it right.

Golden Period

Life is full of Golden Periods. We never realize that we might be living into one.

Respect the Differences

In life, you do not always learn everything from a single person. You need to remember that no one is perfect and there are good things and there are bad things in everyone. Therefore, respecting everyone equally and understanding that everyone has their own life path, different from others, that has defined and made them into who they are. You should not start to hate a person based on his/her bad qualities (as perceived by you). What you take from others is the key to your growth or decline.

See in life you would have several experiences and meet different people that would teach you important and valuable life skills and life lessons. For example, in my life, I respect my father not because he is my father but also because he gave me everything that a father could give his child. He supported me financially, gave me a good education, and taught me what not to do in life. Similarly, I learned important social skills, empathy, respecting differences of opinion, and the importance of human relationships from a very close friend of mine. Yet both aren't perfect human beings. Both have bad qualities too, as you and I have, and you have to accept that. Period.

The point I am trying to make here is that in every human association or experience you have in life, try respecting the differences and loving the similarities. This way you would start learning new things in life looking at people and the world from a very different perspective.

But, what we see today is that people have lost the art of thoughtful, rational, and respectful engagement and discussions. We have become very sensitive to opposing ideas that do not resemble ours.

People, today, are so busy proving others wrong that they have forgotten that they too have a beautiful life and it is not worth at all engaging in those activities that do not bring peace in their or in others' life.

"Try respecting the differences and loving the similarities."

What's your Social Recognition?

You will not be remembered for your flashy clothes, big house, or the accessories/gadgets you carry. You will be remembered for your thoughts, for the way you speak to others, and for the way you behave or treat others. (Your Thoughts - Your Words - Your Actions)

Ethics, Values, and Thoughts of a person define who they are.

Ask to yourself: What's your social recognition? How do you want yourself to be remembered? Do you have a reputation where people feel your absence?

Inner Beauty

You meet a man or a woman. You both are attracted to each other. You both start to like each other. You say that we are in love and want to spend our lives together. You meet a bad phase in your life. Your partner is fed up with you. He/She moves on. You are dejected.

And then you meet another one.

Will you want life to repeat the same story with you again?

No. Right?

It is obvious for many of us to get attracted to one another for the outer beauty other carry to themselves. But in the journey of life, what matters most is the inner beauty one carries with themselves. Those inner beauties; trustworthiness, kindness, empathy, etc, lasts long unlike those outer beauties; physical appearance, falshy clothings, material possessions, etc, that fades away with time. It is smarter to choose 'who they are internally' rather than 'how they look externally'.

At first, you may find one attractive and come to a conclusion that he/she is the one for you. But this can be delusive, because one is never the same all the time. One may pretend to be someone else among others, someone else when they are with you, and someone else when they are alone.

Give time to analyze one's inner beauty. Don't hurry. Remember, all that glitters is not gold. In life, people and circumstances change with time, knowingly or unknowingly.

You = Your experiences?

What would you think of me when I say that "People from villages are bad in nature.".

Would you ask me what have they done to me for me to think like that?

Would you tell me that I shouldn't be making a generalized statement for people from villages?

You might think that I am generalizing it.

You might think that maybe my experience with people from villages would not have been good which made me come to this conclusion.

Well, is it right what I did here?

Is it right to generalize all the people based on one of your bad experiences?

I am wrong in both cases.

So, the question arises here is that why I am wrong and why people, in general, make generalized statements against any race, ethnicity, color, state, clan, country, etc.

The answer to this is simple yet complicated.

It is all based on the experiences one had in the past. One bad experience could make people see those things in a bad light going ahead in their life. And it takes an ample amount of coercion to change the perception they built based on that earlier incident.

"People see the world, based on the experiences they have in their life. It's all hunky-dory if they had good experiences else everything everyone is evil."

"So, what is the right thing to do here?", you would ask.

According to me, firstly, we should stop categorizing people into villages, cities, towns, clans, countries, ethnicities, religions, etc. Because no two people are the same and neither experiences in life are linear and same, even if they belong to the same family, village, town, religion, state, country, etc.

We are shaped by the experience we have in our life, people we meet, thoughts we possess, actions we take, decisions we make, places we travel, etc. Every other thing we interact with plays a vital role in shaping us and our conscience.

We should start looking at people individually and understand their thoughts, circumstances, and troubles before making any comments about any person. Not everyone is evil, and not everyone is a saint. Each of us has good and bad things in us. What's important for us is to look for that good thing.

Black or Transparent

You have two choices: 1. Wear black specs 2. Wear transparent specs.

If you wear black specs, you see everything in black or in darker shades. The real color or the beauty of things around you are mistranslated to you through your black specs. You start to realize that black is the only color and everything should be in black. You reject the idea that things could be of different colors as well. Your vision blocks you to appreciate that life can offer different colors other than black.

Meaning:

You reject your mind to accept differences of opinions. You disregard the possibility of different thoughts and choices different from yours. You devalue people who have different choices, lifestyles, habits, cultures, and food habits. You base your reasoning on the fact that they are different from you. You start to change people, their thoughts, their actions, and their lifestyle to suit your thoughts, actions, and lifestyle. Instead of accepting people as they are, you try to force them to change as you like.

And if you wear transparent specs, you see the real beauty that life presents to you. You look at different things in different colors that create a beautiful canvas in front of you. You appreciate the rainbow, the sunrise, the sunset, the mornings and the evenings, the rain and the snow, the summer and the winter, the mountains and the beaches.

Meaning:

You keep an open mind to appreciate the difference in opinions and thoughts of people around you. You accept and readily enjoy different cultures, traditions, and food habits. You love meeting people having different thoughts, lifestyles, habits, and opinions other than yours. You enjoy learning from these differences. You accept the people as they are. And you are happy as you are.

In life, you perceive or look at things through either of these specs. Which one do you want to choose?

Building Relationships

Any relationship, be it family or love, is built on four pillars: love, care, respect, and trust & understanding each other's thoughts, choices, and emotions.

Relationships should not be taken for granted, efforts are to be made to make others feel valued, respected, and cared for. Two people are never the same, what matters here is how you love the similarities and respect the differences between the two of you.

What also makes a good relationship is the amount of communication you keep with the ones you want to be with. Sharing your thoughts, emotions, or be it anything, and keeping the communication alive helps to keep the relationship alive and healthy. Spending time, putting effort, and motivating others help you to strengthen your every relationship. This ongoing communication helps others feel that there is someone to back them up in times of adversity and pain or to simply share their heart in times of distress. In communication, that starts with empathy, consistency builds respect & reputation until they start to see you as an authority.

Acting selfish and carrying an ego will never help you to have a fruitful relationship, it will only lead to creating a transactional relationship, devoid of any love, care, and respect. Nor giving proof of your love will do anything to mend the sour relationship but rather making others realize, through your words and actions, what you feel about them will be needed to have an unbreakable bond.

In every relationship, differences of opinion are bound to happen, and if you know that you have made a mistake, it takes no harm in accepting your fault. It doesn't matter if you are apologizing to your younger ones or to elders. Running away or neglecting to sort out those differences will only make things worse. Accepting your fault does not make you small in any way, it would only make your persona larger in their eyes and create value in their eyes for you. And it will mend & create beautiful relationships to be cherished forever.

There is one beautiful thought that was shared with me by one of my lovely friends that says 'What is wrong for you may not be wrong for others and what is right for you may not be right for others'.

Earn Your Respect

Value creation and earning respect follow a very simple rule of reciprocity. It increases when you show respect to others and value others' thoughts, choices, and decisions.

You are known for the way you speak to others; be it elders or to your younger ones, for the thoughts you possess and express, the actions you take, the empathy you show, and the respect you give to others. Just having a big professional title and having more money won't earn you respect in the eyes of others.

You earn your value and respect in others' eyes only when you are seen as a responsible and accountable person; when you proactively understand the pain of others and do something to eradicate it; when you selflessly associate yourself for the betterment of people around you; and when you perform your duties honestly.

Making a better You

Don't argue with people below or above your intelligence level. You are not going to win either way.

When you try to argue with people below your intelligence level, they will try to bring you down to their level and wrong you in every way possible.

They believe that whatever they know is right and whatever they don't know yet is all wrong. They have closed their doors to learning new things very long ago. Laugh at their intelligence and move on because your argument will never change their thinking and approach.

When you find yourself in front of someone who, you believe, is above your intelligence level, don't argue with them but instead have a constructive debate on the topic of discussion with an open mind to learning something new and breaking your biases around pre-conceived notions.

When you do this, you are making yourself an inch closer to creating a better version of yourself with each experience.

After you are gone!

It's not about if people will remember you or not when you are gone, it's about what people will talk about you whenever they remember you after you are gone.

People anyway forget about many things in the hustle and bustle of their life. As people have their own set of life, priorities, struggle, aspirations, lifestyles, thoughts, choices, needs, wants, and desires, it is obvious that they will not remember many things from their past.

Most people associate other people with their thoughts, actions, and behavior and not by the number of accessories they carry, the houses they possess, or the flashy clothes they wear.

It is your thoughts, actions, and behavior that will speak volumes about you more than any other material things of the world.

Note: This page is regularly updated. Please visit to this page after some days to read the fresh perspectives on life.

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