Toni's Call to Care
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Kezia Setyawan
Team Cobb
For the last 10 years, mornings have begun with upbeat music and a giant cup of coffee for Toni Schafer, 57, who is a full-time caregiver in Maryville, Mo.
Toni’s life is shaped by the losses she had in the 2010s: her husband, Kenny, died; she became a single parent; her grandmother, Anna, died; and Toni was diagnosed with breast cancer. Anna raised Toni and their roles were reversed near the end of Anna’s life.
“These challenges put me on the path of being a much better person,” Toni says.
Toni believes that going above and beyond as a caregiver is a gift to the people she serves. Right now, she cares for six elderly clients.
One of them is Donna Parmelee, 88, who she helps with a variety of tasks: showering, cooking meals, running errands and caring for her dogs. Toni encourages Donna to continue creating her art, to challenge herself with puzzles and to keep walking so she can remain independent.
Another client, Sue VanDeventer, 74, lives with her husband Olin, 74, on their farm in Barnard, Mo. Sue has multiple sclerosis and relies on Olin as her full-time caregiver. Toni comes in twice a week to help with hair and physical therapy.
“Caregiving brings complete joy and peace in my life, that I’ve done something good,” Toni says.
In her bathroom at home, Toni Schafer, 57, fixes her hair as she prepares to leave for her first client of the day. Toni previously worked as a hairdresser for 30 years.
Toni pats down 88-year-old Donna Parmelee’s hair after she wakes up from a nap.
Toni dries Donna’s arms after her shower. Donna has a fully-accessible bathroom to shower independently, but Toni comes in to help with any hard-to-reach places.
Toni prepares a batch of spaghetti to refrigerate and freeze for Donna's evening meals. Toni also makes another of Donna’s favorites: biscuits and gravy.
After an early Christmas gift of Swiss Colony foods, Donna and Toni figure out how they should store it while in Donna's art room. Donna, a lifelong artist, completes drawings of family, animals and landscapes as a way to express herself.
Toni stands contemplating her evening tasks at her home’s back door. “The hardest part of the job is losing them (my clients) to a skilled facility, or to a funeral,” Toni says.
At Walmart, Toni crosses off items on Donna’s grocery checklist including a pack of tissues and a peach punch drink.
Toni cuts 74-year-old Sue VanDeventer’s hair in her kitchen. Sue’s husband, Olin, calls Toni “Big T,” which stands for "Big Trouble." The couple has worked with Toni for over 10 years.
Toni sits on the bed with Sue before using a transfer hoist for the second set of leg exercises. Sue does physical therapy to slow down her multiple sclerosis progression. “We try to stay laughing, joking and having a good time because the situation sucks,” Toni says.
Toni watches the sun rise from a window before her next workday begins. To relax, Tony likes to drive south from Maryville to Thomas Hill Reservoir and sit by the lake on weekends.
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