My Adventure Book

I Am From

By Sienna Hallcox

I am from the small, pink, and orange lamp

From Dawn dish soap and Apple jacks

I am from the unexpected, one story house

(Calm, then loud, and always smelled of bacon and sea salt brownies)

I am from the many fish

Red and white, to blue, then glowing under the black light

I'm from Polar Express every Christmas Eve and comedians

From Hallcox’s and Wondrash’s

I am from the many derby moms and the Sangria Sundays

From “I never had the heart to separate you from your dad and “I don't deserve to be lied to.”

I'm from faith in our Lord and Savior, and many lectures of God and Jesus Christ

I'm from Palomar Hospital and Europeans

Porcupine meatballs, and brownies

From the grandfather who was a Corpsman in the Navy

The other grandfather who died of sickness before I was born

Old family photos above Great Grama Bolieu’s piano

And all the old quilts, toys, jewelry, and kitchen items to remember those who have passed and tell their fun tales, as life moves on

Sienna Rae, Josephine Hallcox

Sienna. Sienna. Sienna. Sienna. Like Siena, Italy, or the car Sienna, the actual people who are called Sienna/Siena. Originally it was a color; the orange-red color, Sienna.

My dad works with furniture as a job, and one of his favorite colors to work with was Sienna. My mom got to name their first child Madison-aka the coolest sister ever. My dad got to name their second and last child. which is me, so he named me Sienna after the color he loved to work with. S.I.E.N.N.A that's how you spell my name.

Sienna, It sounds like it would belong to a person who is confident and beautiful. My name reminds me of the color pink; and pink reminds me of princesses. Princesses like Mulan, but if you really think about it Mulan is not a princess, now is she? Mulan dresses like a man so her dad doesn't go to war. She has the courage and wits as a princess would, but she never married a prince.

My middle name is a bit of a mouthful; Rae Josephine. The first, Rae, or Ray if your a dude, belongs to my dad’s dad ,Who grew up on a farm doing all his chores before school and then coming home and going to bed and doing it all over again. He was also a Corpsman in the Navy once upon a time and was a short tempered man when my dad was growing up. Yep that's grandpa alright, Kenneth Ray Hallcox. He is not like me, other than the frustration we share. It runs in my dad's side of the family. We get frustrated over something and then get angry over it.

As for Josephine or Joseph in this case, it belonged to my mom’s dad; the one who was funny and owned a restaurant for a hot minute.Although, I never got to meet him, so I don't know much about him, only that he died due to sickness when my mother was 24 . Maurice Joseph Wondrash, but he didn't like Maurice so everyone called him Mori. I bet “Grampa Mauri” would have loved my sister and me calling him that if he was still around.

Of course there are nicknames like my mom’s side of the family. They call me “Si Si”, except my grandmother who calls me “Boom” or “Sweetpea”. As for my dad’s side of the family, they call me “Boom”, except my grandparents. Grandma call me “Si, and grandpa calls me “Taz”, as in the Tasmanian devil. I don't know why I have “Si Si” or “sweetpea” as a nickname but “Boom” is short for “Ruby Boom”. A name I gave myself when I was apart of roller derby 6 years ago. Every player had Derby names like a name for a persona. I chose mine as a reference of the cartoon Ruby Gloom. After derby, “Boom” stuck as a nickname. “Taz” was because I'm kinda like the Tasmanian Devil after I get crafting there is a huge mess to clean up afterwards, dad likes to make jokes about my nickname sometimes.

Adventure to Palomar Mountain

Living in San Diego has it downsides, it can still be hot during the winter months, and only get cold late at night and early in the morning. Sometimes it would be so cold in the morning that I could see my own breath, and the fog would have hung heavy blocking the palm trees in the distance nearby, and by 10:30 everything would have melted away and it would be warm again. If we were lucky there would be ice on the windshields, but that has only happened twice in my life. So I have never really seen snow covering building in white thick blankets seeing the snow fall and getting the news that the snow was too heavy for schools to be in session. The san diego version of that is a scheduled snow day so the staff could have a meeting about lessons and school events or maybe because the staff felt bad for the kids who don't get snow in winter.

It was the middle of December on a cold morning so long ago. My memory is vague, but I remember mom telling me that frost had layered itself on our almost nonexistent grass and wild grounded flowers. I remember looking thru the glass sliding door past our plain and almost rotten like patio. There I saw purple and green glistening with the morning sun as there was a thin frosted layer on the plants outside and I remember every detail like it was a picture almost seeing the frost crystallized on the grass and in that moment, all I could think of was what the backyard would look like with snow instead of frost.

We drove to Palomar Mountain for a last minute road trip. We had parked at the edge of the road in a forest with tall and dark green trees, snow was covering the ground though it wasn't much, the snow was about a quarter inch thick and in some areas you could the the dark and moist ground of the forest floor. We had gotten out of moms purple and old Honda, the air was crisp and the temperature was so cold your fingers would turn ice cold and numb almost. Mom gave me a purple sweater with Tinkerbell on the middle of it and a pair of black fuzzy gloves that where just a hair too large for me. she told me to put it on, so I wouldn't be cold, even with the extra layers, my ears and nose were still frozen.

We had brought boogie boards for sledding. Boogie boards that usually used at the beach. We hulled them uphill and stopped at the huge road, and one by one we slid back down the mountain when it was my turn, I remember sliding down, a huge fallen tree trunk was in my way slightly and slammed into it spinning slightly before slamming into a tree at the base of the hill. When got off my sled i saw my sister near a tree stump I walked over to see she had made a small snowman. Of course I wanted to do it as well but because of the gloves I kept failing to do, so eventually I gave up.

Which One of Them is Not Like The Other.

I haven't always had a problem with my body. I think it started in 5th grade at the fitness test when a kid saw what I weighed and shared it with everyone. I got self-conscious and cried during the situation. It got worse at the start of middle school my stomach grew bigger and bigger and at the time I was wearing dresses with short sleeves and long shorts. Looking back on it now, wearing those types of clothes was not doing me any favors.

As time went on, it became harder to find clothes that I like, in my size. and if it looked good on me, let alone clothes that I felt confident in. It wasn't until spring break of 8th grade that I had found clothes that I loved and made me feel skinny, just like everyone else. Before I was wearing pants that would stop below the knee and t-shirts that were not really a confidence booster. Avengers Endgame had come out and someone made fun of me calling me “Thanos” because I wore a pair purple pants and a purple shirt, so I stopped wearing purple altogether. Mom had introduced me to Q Plus and when I first entered, I found 2 outfits that I loved! The first was a black dress that had flowery lace on the chest, and built in shorts which was a blessing considering that it was below butt-length and goes higher than mid thigh. The second was a red spaghetti strap shirt that went a little low on the bust and had ripped holes at the chest with a black under dress shirt, a pair of ripped jeans and a cardigan that was a beige color with red stripes that were vertical.

Oddly enough seeing the scars that crawl up and down my back that creep into my arms, even on my stomach, that is not what damages my self confidence. Its everyone else. I have friends who are more thin than I am and who can't gain weight, and I love them to death, but I envy that fact that they don't get tired after going up the stairs or take laps around the school. Not only that but I have friends who struggle with depression and anxiety. We all make jokes about it knowing that it's to cheer up and have fun, but compared to that it feels like my problems don't matter like theirs do. They have bigger problems that can't be solved easily, while mine is about making a habit of eating good food every day and going to the gym everyday. So, when it comes to my problem, a lot of the time I just ignore it.

I want to change the way I look. I want to go to the gym and eat less junk food, but I don’t. Maybe it's because of the pep talks I get that don't do so great on self image. “You need to move more and eat less.” mom says in the car- a conversation that not inspiring anymore; has no effect. The phrase is like the wind, it always comes back sometimes stronger and sometimes weaker but it always lingers , And no one never notices it anymore. I know my parents love me and they do what's best, but having the same conversation over and over it just gets old then turns me off from wanting to fix my weight. I have thought about starving myself, I don't do it though because it always ends becoming anorexic and sometimes death. Even if I would have survived, I would still have to decide to get better. It would be more work to pull myself out of the pit I had already dug for myself. I also don't want to live with a toxic mindset for however long it takes before I realize how bad things had gotten for me and my weight, I would rather lose weight in a healthy way rather than by being toxic towards myself.

Something’s Always Creeping

It’s only been the past couple of years I have had an irrational fear of the dark. And my curiosity with horror as a genre doesn't help. I hate horror movies and spooky stories. Pretty much anything that has the thyme horror i will not touch with a ten foot pole. I have always hated the feeling of adrenaline pumping through my veins. The taste of copper in my mouth, and My heart pumping so hard it feels like it's going to rip threw my ribcage. If you like the feeling of death then go right ahead and watch horror movies till you die, I’ll be in my bed watching She Ra, Princess of Power.

As I got older my curiosity grew and got the better of me. When I was 13, I watch a video called “The Kill count, Bird box” by Dead Meat, a youtube channel. I watch it and I was surprised that it wasn't very scary. In the video it does a summary of the movie and count each time a person died. At the end they would always analyse everybody that dies. How many females how many males and so on. One thing led to another and I started binging more videos by them, Kill count for, The Mist, The Quiet Place, Pet Sematary. I was never freaked out until I got curious about jigsaw and decided to find the creepy counts on the channel dead meat. I was freaked out. So freaked out that that night I never got sleep because is was scared of what was lurking in the dark to even think about the wonderful escape from reality called sleep. I ended up bringing the channel Dollightful on my mother's computer. It got better over the week, and my sister gave me her guardian angel night light to protect me while I slept. Lucky I got over my fear by next month.

It was about 7 months later, my fear grew again. I felt safe in my room but when I had the need to use the bathroom, I always get freaked out go quickly as possible. It got worse after I saw the movie, It. At around 3 am I woke up needing to use the bathroom. But I believe that 3 am is the devil's hour. Knowing that I was freaked out. In the end I ended up holding it for over an hour. When I did, I was terrified of the darkness surrounding the house. There was l.e.d lights from different devices that always looked like eyes. That just freaked me out even more. It went on for went on for a couple of months, waking up at 3am refusing to go to the bathroom and then running as quickly as possible at 4 am. I'm a lot better at it now but the dark mixed with the eerie silence, still gets creepy for me.

Galaxy's Edge

I went to Disneyland for the second time and this time I was with my Aunt, Uncle, one of my Cousins, and my Uncle's side of his family. My Aunt is the youngest of 3. My dad being the oldest and her being the youngest, although they had moved a couple times they always lived in California. My uncle grew up in South Africa and moved to America with his mom, I don't know much about my uncle after those facts. My dads side of the family is amazing and so much different then mom’s side. I feels more natural being with my dads family then with my moms.

Back to Disneyland,we never got breakfast that day since we were trying to make it for the ribbon ceremony when the park opens. When we did me, my dad, and my sister went to a small food stand. I had gotten a giant, juicy, green apple and we all headed for Cinderella's castle. When we got to the castle, we had to stop for pictures. Some way somehow my sister made me laugh so hard that I had choked on the apple I was eating and then the piece when up in my throat and shot thru my nose. Everyone broke out laughing after that even me.

Towards the middle of the day the entire crew went to the new Galaxies Edge. The amount of detail that went into it was amazing. From the employs co splaying to the walls I really felt like you were on another planet. They even had the life sized scale of the millennium falcon. Every detail accounted for and even battle damage, like it has just flown threw a war zone. Even while going threw the line for the new and only ride the animatronics were so well done it fooled me into thinking there was a person cosplaying. The amount of details in the ride was amazing even when you were outside waiting to go on the ride it looked like the inside the millennium falcon where you could play space chess or just sit down on the couch and relax. It was amazing to look at and experience.

You Can Never Dream to Big

When I am done with high school I want to go to Russia. Before high school I never wanted to go anywhere, I wanted to stay as close to home as I possibly could and stay there. I never wanted to leave home. Until I discovered a certain fandom about countries. The country humans fandom is basically personified countries. There are two versions of it the first being Pollen Balls. Pollen Balls are basically comics making fun of country's history and stereotyping them. They are also drawn in the form of balls. The second part of this fandom is Country Humans witch to put it basically shipping fuel for absolutely have to ship something. The more famous ships are Britain and France, Germany and Poland, Canada and Ukraine, and America and Russia. In this fandom my favorite ship would half to bee america and Russia. Maybe that's why I want to go visit Russia, and maybe I want to see it for myself and see if the stereotypes are true or not

When i'm out of high school I want to spend one year to visit Russia apply for Collage. Ever since 6th grade I have had a passion for art. My dream job is to work at Laika Studios as a puppet creator. While I'm in College I want to live in a share house. My closest friends with me. Waking up to crazily and over dramatic moments would be a great way yo start the day. Rushing around to get to our cars some of us would be carpooling to get to college and coming back with crazy stories. Talking to each other while sitting on the couch watching silly cartoons and eating fast food for the 10th time that week. Yah. That would be fun. My dream that I'll make happen when I go to college.

My Author Biography

My name is Sienna Hallcox, currently I am a freshman attending High Tech High North County. I have been apart of the High Tech system since 4th grade, meaning this is my 6th year at High Tech. I have a passion for art. Weather is story writing or painting, I love it all I like to try all kinds of things like watercolor and doll customization. My plans for high school is to get good grades to be able to apply for CalArts and The University of Riverside.Also to get my drivers licence as soon as possible. My plan after High School is to go to college to get a masters in illustration and graphic design, and a minor in writing. I also want to get a share house with friends. My Dream is to visit Russia after highschool and become a well known artist when in my adulthood.