Overcoming Rejection

There is no reason to beat around the bush here. Rejection hurts. It feels like you're sprinting towards the finish line when all of the sudden, you fall flat on your face. Being rejected from something you have had high hopes for can be soul shattering.

In one moment, you are so close to achieving a dream you have had to work hard for and maybe even convince yourself that you could in fact achieve it, but in the next moment, that dream feels so far out of reach. Rejection can make you question your self-worth and doubt your abilities.

Rejection hurts, but you will overcome it.

Let yourself feel what you need to feel. I say this so often when it comes to issues that cause emotional distress because it is so important. The opportunity may come around once again, but it is gone for the moment. Allow yourself to grieve for what you have lost.

These losses are real. Give yourself a moment to breathe and take it all in. Don't be hard on yourself for needing time. While it may feel counterintuitive to do this when you are so busy, you save time in the end.

When we don't take some time to acknowledge our feelings around rejection, those feelings don't go away. Because you are trying to ignore how you feel, you remember it even more. But when we take some time to just sit with our emotions, we can find some resolution (even if it is just temporary).

You may have been rejected from grad school. You may have been rejected from several jobs you applied for. You may have been repeatedly rejected over the course of several years.

Regardless of whether this is your first time being rejected or if it is your hundredth. You are smart. You are amazing. You do deserve the opportunities you have been rejected from. Being rejected does not change that even though you may feel that it does.

Your worth is inherent and not defined by what you can or cannot achieve. Achievements don't define you; if you let them, then you will never feel accomplished.

Rejection can come with shame. We might want to shut out friends, family, or mentors who want to support us because of this shame. I can guarantee you, every single person you respect and admire has faced rejection at one time or another.

Shame may make us want to avoid talking to others about how we feel. However, I have felt that talking about the emotions you are feeling about being rejected has been vital to accepting and overcoming the situation.

Reach out. People are more willing to support you than you think. Generally speaking, we tend to think more harshly and negatively about ourselves than others do. Keep this in mind.

There is nothing wrong with falling down and feeling hurt. What is important though is getting back up again. It might take days, weeks, months, or years. We might come out of the situation mad about the time and energy we wasted. What is important though is that we made it through.

However long it takes for you to overcome this barrier, it's alright. You overcame it in the exact amount of time you needed. Some people rebound quickly, others take a long time. We are all unique individuals with our own paths and stories.

As we overcome the trials that come our way, we grow stronger and are more prepared to face new challenges. We build resilience as such.

From every situation, there are lessons that can be learned.

Those lessons may be practical. For example, you can email any program you were rejected from and ask them why. Most programs will have an administrator who will get back to you with details regarding your application.

Often times, you will come out of a negative situation understanding yourself better. You may learn that your goals don't actually align with what you were trying to do. You may find that this is something you absolutely want.