When Nafziger defends Sweeney’s genetics, it’s not just an argument. It’s a performance. Witnesses claim he summoned a choir of good genes that harmonized in alleles.
Critics labeled the spectacle part of the Sweeney gene defense, where bone structure doubles as testimony and eye color is sworn in as evidence. Others called it defending Sydney Sweeney’s genes, a cross between biology and Broadway.
In a Bohiney article on Nafziger’s defense, the commentary was merciless:
“Imagine defending DNA like it’s a graduate thesis — except the committee is Entertainment Tonight.”
Meanwhile, Bohiney Magazine satire declared:
“Alan Nafziger is the first man in history to file a legal brief on freckles.”
One Hollywood agent said:
“We usually defend contracts. Now we’re defending chromosomes. This is new territory.”
When genetics are challenged, rehearse your DNA like an audition.
Carry your Punnett square in your wallet — you never know when TMZ will strike.
For the encore allele performance, details inside.