About Stay

On a trip in 2023, II read the following on the back of a T-shirt.  "Hey, you, the one reading this.  The world is better with you in it."  It had a profound emotional impact on me, and I decided to put those feelings into music.  The result is this work entitled Stay.

Part of the unBroken Project, this piece is intended to be an anthem of hope, love, and understanding for those who find it challenging to go on in the face of adversity and for those who sometimes feel that the weight of the world is too much to bear.  The piece carries a paraphrase of that message at the top of the score and on all of the parts:

"Hey you.  The one playing this.  The world is better with you in it."

And now, a confession.

The whole point of the unBroken Project is to encourage discussion of mental and emotional health, and I do not feel I can continue to do that without being 100% honest.

As part of my particular mental disorder (Anxiety/Depression), I have very extreme swings in my emotional mood.  These are due to chemical imbalances in my brain that come in waves.  I have likened them before to clouds, but I more frequently refer to them as peaks and valleys.  When I am at one of my peaks, I feel like nothing can stop me, and everything will be alright. 

When I hit my valleys, though, things are very, very different.  

They start with me feeling as if I have no energy left, and then it becomes more emotional as I experience symptoms of paranoia, depression, and fixation.  As it deepens, I have panic attacks, shortness of breath, and moments of fugue state.

When I reach the deepest part of my valleys, I experience suicidal ideation.

So, in some ways, I've been writing these pieces to myself.

I have hinted at this many times but have held back stating it directly out of fear of what the general public would think of this, but I do not feel I can tiptoe around this issue any longer, out of hope that my experience might connect with others and assist them in taking positive steps.

Before anyone feels it necessary to try to "rescue me," I have already been rescued.  Time and time again, as a matter of fact.

I have been rescued by the fact that I have the tools that I need to manage my conditions.  I have medication.  I have therapy.  I have a wonderful support system of family and friends who understand my condition and offer support when needed.  Because of this, I make it through the valleys every time.

Also, just being able to name and understand what happens to me during my depressive episodes has given me more power over it.  Not total, mind you, but enough to weather the storms.

Others are not so lucky.

1 in 5 adults in the US experience mental health issues each year.

1 in 6 youths in the US experience mental health issues each year.

90% of suicides worldwide are attributable to mental illness.

Suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death in the United States.

I am not naive enough to believe that a simple statement at the top of a piece of music or that a performance of one of my works will be enough to pull someone back from the edge.  That would be arrogant at best and actively harmful at worst.  People who experience such things need professional help.  My goal with the unBroken project is to tear down social taboos around discussing these issues, to ease a sense of isolation (you are NOT alone), and to educate and inform people so they will seek out the tools they need to lead happy and successful lives or assist others in seeking help.

The one reading this.

The world is better with YOU in it, too.

Stay.

Peace, Love, and Music

Randall Standridge

About Scream

Scream is a bombastic work for concert band that utilizes three main components to create its soundscape: a 12-tone row, an octatonic scale, and the sounds of screaming (both from our human performers and from a nifty little instrument with the best name ever: The Aztec Death Whistle, available on Amazon!).  The three elements combine to make a highly dissonant, energetic piece of music whose main purpose is to channel the negative emotions of the performers into something exciting for themselves and the audience.

Why should I scream?

We all experience negative emotions.  The question is, what do we do with them?  Do we bottle them up?  Do we pretend they aren’t there?  Do we allow them to consume us and color how we interact with others?

We can.  We can do all of those things.

Or…

We can rechannel that negative energy into action!

We can pour it into an intense workout.  We can let it fuel our creative output.

And we can scream.

Scream it out until it is used up like a tank of gas or a dead battery.

So, do this with me.  Breathe in and put all of that negative energy into your lungs.  Picture them inhabiting that space like phantoms.

Now scream.

Scream, scream, SCREAM them out to the night sky.

About Fragile

Fragile starts very softly, with both beauty and dissonance.  The individual is aware that something is wrong but is trying to bravely persist.  The clarinets introduce the main theme of the work, a bittersweet melody that is lovely and vulnerable (Shirley’s Theme after Mr. Standridge’s mother who lives with severe depression).  As the first segment continues, dissonant elements and a three note descending theme signals the onset of a mental health crisis.

The second segment is manic and violent.  The individual struggles with their condition as everything seems to be in darkness.  The piece builds to a thunderous moment before dying away to a single dissonant sound, signaled by two clarinet notes.  The individual is broken.

The original theme sounds out again, unaccompanied (flutes).  Slowly the individual resumes their life, still hopeful, but afraid the cycle will repeat.  The piece ends on an ambiguous note - uncertain, but also unfinished. 

NEConsortium For 2024!  

Ashford School had a unique experience to be a part of a consortium of schools that sponsered two new works in the UnBroken Project.

•STAY

This will be  lyrical work that will serve as a message of hope for those who struggle with mental health issues. The work will include both major and minor sections, creating a shifting palette of light and shadow.  Material will be pulled from the climax of unBroken, as well as new material.  The piece will combine elements of symphonic tradition and pop sensibilities.  The inspriation was Mr. Standrige walking down the street and seeing a person wearing a shirt tht said "Hey you, the person reading this, the world is better with you in it."

•SCREAM:  

This will be an aggressive work for young band that serves as a tool to channel negative emotion and energy into cathartic action.  The work will be primarily in minor mode and very rhythmic but will also incorporate brief elements of the 12-tone row used in "(not) Alone" as well as unBroken.  The work will also use aleatoric effects, vocal effects, body percussion, extreme dissonance, bombastic percussion, and an instrument called an "Aztec Death Whistle."  

Timeline

•Digital copies of the music will be delivered to paid consortium members beginning March 11, 2024.  Copies will be sent to other groups as payment or purchase orders are received.

•The premiere rights to the work through June 1, 2024.  The work will be made available to the general public June 1, 2024.

With your support and purchase, you will receive the following:

-A Digital Copy (score and parts in PDF format) of the works you choose to sponsor ("Stay" and/or "Scream")

-Your name(s) and school will appear in the official program notes as sponsors and members of the consortium for the Digital Versions AND the print versions when they are produced.

-A video introduction for the works recorded by Randall Standridge (this will be for the piece in general and will not be specific to each school)

-Access to a video journal/vblog detailing the creation of the works and their inspirations.

We are thankful to Mr. Standridge for the opportunity to be a part of these incredible new works and look forward to playing them on our 2024-2025 programs.