Counseling

ACCESSING COUNSELING SERVICES

I am available for virtual counseling sessions and consultations during this time. Please reach out if you need advice, a thought partner, or mental health support for your child. Ways to stay in touch:

Visit SV Counseling Website
Join my Counseling Google Classroom for tips, worksheets, ideas delivered to you electronically on a daily basis. You will need to login with your child's SRCS google account and enter the CODE fc2tph7
Email mgreenwood@srcs.org to set up regular check-ins via phone or Google Meet. I will be reaching out to all of the families that I currently work with but am also available for individualized support to all of our students.
Sun Valley's beloved Jen Couture will be hosting weekly Mindful Mondays. Follow the link for details.

PARENTING RESOURCES

This link will take you to our district's online website where there is a wide variety of parent resources including:

Food pantry
Academic resources and tech support
Financial support
Mental health resources
Parent training opportunities
Talking to kids about Coronavirus
Positive parenting resources
Enrichment activities
Stress management and healthy coping
Links to other professional resources

June 3rd Principal Chat

Principal's Chat

Two opportunities on June 3rd to check in with Principal Harris to hear about where we are at and where we are going.

Parent Ed Night - Middle School Success Skills

Middle School Transitions

In case you missed it, here is the presentation from our Middle School Meeting. We shared our top ten tips for a successful middle school experience and heard from Principal Bob Marucci from Davidson Middle School along with some SV alum.

TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF DURING THIS PANDEMIC

Hello, families!

We are in a time of great change. Change always brings about both uncertainty and opportunity. As we adjust to this new reality of confinement and a global crisis, it is important to take care of ourselves so we can meet the new demands as best we can. As a counselor, I have access to many professional organizations that offer useful advice to maintaining mental health during this pandemic. Here are some of my favorite tips:

Security. The first and most critical step in wellness is assessing your family's security. Do you have access to food and shelter? We have many resources that can help - from Marin's Food Pantry, to school lunches, rent support services, and unemployment support through the county. Please visit our Critical Resources page for assistance. Even if you have the basics taken care of for your family, it helps to know that you have emergency contact information ready in case it is needed as well as an emergency plan in case someone in your household develops symptoms. Check in with neighbors, and make plans with extended family as well.
Routine. The first few weeks of a major life transition will likely be chaotic. It may take a while to find a routine that works for your family. Changes may continue to occur as the days and weeks ahead bring new challenges. Something as simple as a morning meet can help to make even the most stressful situation a little more manageable. Talk about the plan for the day in the morning. Make a list and write it on a piece of paper - it doesn't need to be a fancy chalk board. At the end of the day, it will feel good to be able to cross out what was accomplished, assess what still needs to be done, and make a plan for the next day. I'm also a big fan of the family dinner - where you can share highs and lows from the day, and offer "do-overs" if needed for any frustrating moments.
Patience. Be easy on yourself. Allow yourself the time to adjust. No one expects you to be perfect. Practice positive affirmations - "I can do hard things" "This too shall pass" "I've got this" "I am doing my best, and that is enough for now" - filling our minds with encouraging and gentle thoughts helps bring a sense of calm. If you have trouble finding an affirmation, just think - What would I say to my best friend if they were going through a really hard time? What would I want them to know? Be patient with others, too. Children may not have the cognitive capacity to talk about stress so it often comes out in other ways. You should still hold them accountable for behavior choices, but they need extra patience and encouragement during this time. Many who we look to as leaders - teachers, principals, doctors, city leaders - may not have the answers that we want as quick as we would want. Try to extend a little grace. Assume best intentions - every one of us is dealing with our own fears and worries while simultaneously trying to learn the new skills in order to reach a high level of professionalism. It takes time. Extending grace means being patient, offering to help rather than question competency, and allowing others to make mistakes as they figure this out.
Acceptance. Pushing negative feelings away, or thinking we are not allowed to feel them because others have it worse is not going to be helpful. This is no walk in the park. This is hard. It's OK to say that. Only when we accept our feelings just as they are do we realize that we CAN, in fact, do hard things. I always tell kids "you've got to name it to tame it." Acknowledge the feels, let yourself feel it deeply in your bones. And then, do the things that make you feel better - more on this soon!
Connection. With your family, friends, loved ones, with nature, with yourself. People who have a variety of positive, warm relationships are more resilient than those who do not. While it might be a sad substitute for the real thing, make those virtual dates. Get outside for a walk and smile at the neighbors. Enjoy the extra time with pets and your children nearby. Twenty years from now, your children won't remember what they learned or didn't learn during this time. But they will remember the extra board games you played or the new rituals your created.
Perspective. This means you have an awareness of how your individual story relates to that of your place in the world or in history. While it doesn't really help to compare suffering, it does provide some sense of gratitude when you consider situations that other people might be in at this time; or when you think about other events in history that have been this significant. Collecting and sharing stories from your parents, grandparents, or from books and movies can help you model resilience to your children. It helps to recognize that other people just like you have been through difficult ordeals. How did they cope? What brought them through it? Having these discussions can help you recognize personal and family strengths.
Coping. Finally, assess your own coping tools. A coping tool is an action or thought process that helps you psychologically manage a difficult situation. The absence of healthy coping can lead to maladaptive coping mechanisms (venting, denial, avoidance, behavioral disengagement, over/under-eating, substance abuse, dangerous thrill seeking, self-blame, negative self-talk, or other unhelpful thinking styles). Take a look at the list and identify the healthy ways in which you cope with adversity:
1. Processing difficult situation and emotions. This differs from venting in that the point is not to release the built up emotions but to set them down and take a good look. Talking through a situation with a trusted friend, advisor, or therapist can help you understand what happened, why you had the reaction that you had, and what you might need to do to either let it go or work towards a solution.
2. Planning/problem solving .There is wisdom in being able to differentiate situations that need to be solved vs those that we must accept. If there is a problem that has a solution it can be helpful to make lists or use a decisional balance worksheet (pros vs cons of specific actions).
3. Distraction. Sometimes you just need to take your mind off the problem for a while. Read a book, watch a show, go for a walk, emerse yourself in a hobby. This gives your mind a break, and can have the added benefit of providing self-care or grounding, too (more on that below!)
4. Grounding . Any activity that gets you out of your head and into your body - meditation, physical exertion, deep breathing, getting into nature, or taking a warm bath or shower is going to activate your parasympathetic nervous system. In this way, your body can trick your mind into thinking it is safe and help slow the amygdala free response network that amps up when you are under stress. This gives you a chance to use the thinking part of your brain and make planned decisions. Oh! And it feels, good, releasing loads of stress reducing hormones and neurotransmitters.
5. Emotional release. This means letting yourself feel the feeling - turning up some music, watching a sad movie, howling at the moon!
6. Self-love. Pamper yourself with an in-home spa day, wrap yourself in a blanket and binge watch a favorite show, buy yourself a little treat.
7. Accessing a higher power. Finding a way of being of service to others or relying on your faith both help you tap into something larger than yourself.
8. Positive reframing. While it's not always helpful to focus soley on the silver lining, it should be part of your coping tool box. What is the lesson I am learning through this? What part of me is growing, changing? What will I do different in the future because of this? When we are able to draw a deeper meaning or significance from adversity, we feel better. Happier people tend to practice gratitude, forgiveness, and positivity. These states of being don't come naturally for everyone, but putting intentional focus can be beneficial.
9. Humor. Laughter, as they say, is the best medicine. And it costs absolutely nothing.
10. Use of emotional supports. Pets are people, too! Connecting with others is crucial to our overall mental health. And you will find different friends are good for different needs. You might find your indulgent buddy that wants to watch a show with you; your exercise pal that keeps you active; and your friend that always has the best advice. Just be sure to return the favor - remember number 7 above.