As the old Harry Chapin song goes :
'"And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man in the moon.
"When you coming home, dad?" "I don't know when,
But we'll get together then.
You know we'll have a good time then."
Unfortunately this sentiment like many others in this busy world marked my relationship with Mum and Dad for many years. However I am the lucky one and I managed through a variety of circumstances to spend some really quality time with Mum and Dad before they died.
Wandering around with Dad when I could get him into the old Toyota Dual Cab or a wheel chair produced many fantastic memories. On this particular occasion we had gone in the old Toyota and done the various tasks required for the day and made our way to the Coffs Harbour jetty.
We often ended up here to enjoy fish and chips from the Coffs Harbour Fisherman’s Co-Op. And so it was on this beautiful spring day. The sky was a deep and clear blue, a gentle wind kept the temperature to around 18 to 20 deg. All very comfortable as we sat in the front of the old Toyota Dual Cab, windows down and gazing across the harbour with the fishing trawlers in the foreground.
Now I don’t know about you but I think that fishing trawlers are the most fantastic pieces of sculpture that humans can create. They are raw functionality that show a different and intriguing profile from every angle as they gently move on the end of their mooring ropes. I can look at them all day and be continually amazed at the shape and the various components that one can only wonder how each piece is used when at sea.
As we sat eating our fish and chips I often was amazed at how Dad delicately held his food in the tips of the index finger and thumb on his left hand. Dad had the most interesting hands, very long elegant fingers with well formed nails all culminating on scarred hands that showed the many years of hard work. Well scarred by cuts and abrasions and many years in the sun.
Now as you may be aware Dad had a very limited education and came from a family that was very much at home on the other side of the track. I can only wonder where he got the art of such delicate eating etiquette. But there we were in conditions that others would kill for without a worry in the world thoroughly enjoying our simple lunch. Whilst deep and meaningful discussions were long gone I felt a special bond that I will never forget.
Now whilst Dad by this stage may have lost many of his faculties or had chosen out of tiredness to not use them, one faculty he never lost was his ability to see the irony and humour in all situations. Dad often made us laugh with his fantastic and often wicked sense of humour.
As we sat enjoying our lunch in these idyllic surrounding Dad took a particularly long chip and pointed to a pair of pelicans gracefully drifting between the fishing trawlers.
Dad said ’ See those birds over there?’
I said ‘yes Dad ‘
He said ‘what sort of birds are they? ’
I answered ‘ they are pelicans Dad”.
‘Hmm’ he said and went back to his thoughts and to enjoying his lunch.
Some minutes went past and again Dad taking a long chip pointed to the drifting pelicans and asked what sort of birds they were. Again I answered ‘pelicans Dad’.
This question and answer session went on many times and just as I was getting sick of it and I suspect Dad detected my frustration he selected yet another long chip and said ’You see those birds over there?’.
Again I said ’Yes Dad’.
He paused and said “They’re pelicans’.
This was a change from the previous dialogue.
Again after a pause and with a wicked twinkle in his beautiful blue eyes he said ‘Yes, pelicans indeed, but are they freshwater or saltwater pelicans?.
I had been set up, reeled in and had yet again.
He simply smiled and carried on eating his lunch.
I loved those days.