Marriage

Vivaha

In Hinduism, marriage is an alliance between two families. Marriage (Vivaha) is perhaps the most important samskara. Traditionally it was the only rite performed for women, and for men in the fourth varna (shudras).

In the past, marriages were arranged by the parents or elders. A couple would stay together for life or until the husband took to the path of renunciation. Divorce was not allowed, and those who left their partners were often ostracised from society.

In Hinduism, marriage is not followed by traditional rituals for consummation. In fact, marriage is considered complete or valid even without consummation because the marriage is between two souls and it is beyond the body.

Purpose of marriage

Hindu Dharma has prescribed four Purusarthas (Four basic pursuits of life), that is Dharma , Artha (Wealth), Kama (Pleasure) and Moksha (Liberation). The purpose of the marriage sanskar is to fulfil the Purushartha of ‘Kama’ and then gradually advance towards ‘Moksha’. Several important things in the life of a man and woman are associated with marriage; for example, love between man and woman, their relationship, progeny, various happy events in their lives, social status and prosperity.

Modern Hindu Marriage

Today, couples are ‘guided’ in their choice of partner rather than having a marriage arranged. When the couple decides to get married, a priest checks the partners’ horoscopes to find a good time for the wedding, which normally takes place in the bride’s home. Within Hinduism there is an enormous variety of wedding traditions but most common elements are drawn from Vedic literature. Scripture lists eight types of marriage and current rituals fall within the “Brahma” category. The ancient, elaborate and often lengthy ceremony is usually performed by brahmana priests. There is much regional and denominational variation, but certain features are common.

This video demonstrates many customs celebrated by south Indian Hindus

Key Actions

Welcoming the bridegroom
Exchanging flower garlands
The daughter being given in marriage
Sacred fire ceremony
Holding of hands
Circumambulation of the sacred fire
Marking the bride’s hair-parting with kum-kum
Taking seven steps together
Tying the knot (the garments of bride and groom)
Viewing the Pole Star
Receiving the elders’ blessings
Exchanging presents

Misconceptions

It is important to clarify two misconceptions about Hindu marriages: arranged marriages and child marriages. Hindu scriptures prohibit use of force or coercion in marriages.

Arranged marriages are based on agreement from both the bride and the groom, and should not be confused with forced marriages. In the Vedic period, child marriages were strictly prohibited. Later, due to political and economical changes, some new social traditions started which deviated from the Vedic teachings.

Child marriages and the associated tradition of dowry were some of the deviations which reformist movements in modern times have attempted to correct. Child marriages are now banned by law in India, although reports suggest that the practice has not been eradicated.

This video is a recap of a bride and groom who come from very different Hindu backgrounds. They work to bring together a number of customs and traditions from both regions in their three day wedding ceremony

Key Symbols

Lavish dress (bride & groom)

- Representing the incarnations of Vishnu and Lakshmi

Mehendi patterns on hands and feet, wearing the colour red, wearing lots of jewelery (bride)

- Represent Lakshmi

Tumeric, Sandlewood paste, Oil

- Represents fertility

Bride stepping on a stone

- Symbolises her willingness and strength to overcome difficulties in the pursuit of her duties.

Barley poured through the hands of the couple

- Symbolises that they will work together

Red kumkum symbol on Bride's head

- Symboises that she is a married woman

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