A comment that has come up time and time again in our school is the notion that a critique of classroom management may be viewed by some as a critique of you as a professional. For many in our profession, being an educator is part of our identity, so we sometimes perceive these critiques of us rather than as feedback on a skill we can continue to develop.

Some skills seem to be integral to the ‘good teacher’ identity and so they become associated with that identity. “A good teacher has good classroom management, so if I have good classroom management I am a good teacher. If I don’t, then I am not.” But there are many teachers who may have good classroom management but their students do not learn effectively. Or many teachers who are good teachers that are still developing their classroom management. These are not the same thing even though they feel connected.

Shifting gears, though, many of our middle school and high school students also have a tendency to want to protect their identities as well. 

A student who is an ‘A student’ who receives a low grade has two choices in their mind. They can accept that maybe they aren’t an A student, or, they can blame it on something else such as a teacher that doesn’t like them, or a poorly made test, etc. 

A student who has had a traumatic or unstable home life and is essentially raising themselves may become defensive quickly when told what to do because part of their identity is being independent and self-sufficient and that has been challenged. 

When we challenge these ideas with students, we are challenging their sense of identity. Unless they can separate individual occurrences, or adjust their identities to incorporate these events, may respond defensively to protect themselves. 

The student who is an A student may need to realize that if they want to be an A student, they need to work to maintain that. This means studying, taking advantage of opportunities to improve poor marks, etc. 

The student who identifies as being independent may need a lighter approach where you work with them on their terms. This may mean inviting them to make better choices rather than trying to simply leverage your authority as an adult or a teacher 

Just as teachers want to protect their identity, so do students. Protecting our identity is protecting our sense of self. Hopefully, as we grow and get older we recognize that our identities are not dependent on a single particular skill or aspect of ourselves. As teachers, if we can make that separation, there is no limit to our growth. In dealing with our students, it is important to understand that many of them do not have that skill yet and are still trying to discover or create their identity. As educators we need to be mindful of this and intentional in our interactions. This means working with students to support that identity growth since helping youth to develop into adults is a foundational part of our work as educators.