Loss isn’t easy. When you factor in being a highschooler who has a job, participates in sports and clubs, and has a heavy load of schoolwork, it doesn’t get easier. However, it’s important to realize that grief is something everyone will experience eventually in life, and what’s important is learning how to deal with it in a healthy way. 

Death is sometimes unexpected and the resulting grief can be difficult to navigate. When I was 14, I lost a friend to suicide. It threw me for a loop to say the least. I was confused, shocked, and often angry. However, my mom was there to support and guide me which made the grieving process much easier for me. That isn’t to say that grief is easy because to be straight with you, it’s not. Grief by any means does not look the same for everyone but there are things that we can do to help us ease the pain as we return to our everyday lives. In this article, I’ll share some resources with you that may be helpful as you deal with loss. I know that many of these helped me those years ago and I hope that they can help you too. Most important of all, please realize that you are not alone in this process. Everyone in the Natick community is here to support you during this difficult time. 

In-School Resources

Natick High has offered grief counseling over the past few weeks. Although now it is not directly available, guidance counselors, school psychologists, teachers, and other adults in the building are here for you if you should need them. If you need to leave class to chat with someone or take a walk, your teachers will understand. I’ve included some more contact information at the end of the article. 

Resources Outside of School

We’re very fortunate to have many grief resources in Natick and in surrounding towns. One of these is Jeff’s Place. Jeff’s place offers bimonthly open support groups for teens who are dealing with death and loss. They are facilitated by professionally trained volunteers and clinicians. Jeff’s Place offers both young adult and teen groups which meet in the evenings. Fill out an application today to join them. 

Seven Hills offers virtual grief support groups in both English and Spanish weekly for those who are experiencing loss. Their services are free and are facilitated by a professional trauma clinician. Support groups may sound a bit intimidating, but talking with others who’ve gone through similar experiences may prove to be extremely helpful.

Media

Something that I found particularly helpful when I was dealing with the death of a friend was reading books, watching videos, and listening to podcasts that related to loss. Not only was it incredibly eye opening to hear from others my age who have experienced similar things, but it also acted as a bit of a distraction so I could avoid slipping into a downward spiral of negative thoughts. Here are some recommendations to check out.

Dougy Center’s Grief Out Loud podcast is a mix of personal stories, tips, and interviews with professionals all about grief. You can find it on Spotify! Their most recent episode focuses on COVID-19 and loss as we approach the one year anniversary of the pandemic. GriefCast is a unique podcast that mixes humour with coping with grief which I think is great. It’s from 2016, but a lot of the episodes are still incredibly relevant. If you look up grief podcasts on Spotify or other streaming platforms, I guarantee you’ll find some interesting podcasts and at least one that you’ll like.

There are a lot of books written about grief. Some of them are religious, some of them are humorous, and some of them are plain sad. Regardless, reading is a very helpful coping mechanism and reading books about loss can help you realize you’re not alone. Here are some of my recommendations. Check the library or the Minuteman Library Network for availability. 

• Modern Loss: Candid Conversation About Grief by Rebecca Sofer and Gabrielle Birkner

• It’s Ok that You’re not Ok by Megan Devine

• Light Filters In: Poems by Caroline Kaufman

• Heads Up: Changing Minds on Mental Health by Melanie Siebert

• Bearing The Unbearable by Joanne Cacciatore

Music is already an amazing thing and I find that I often listen to it when I need to relax, clear my mind, or even reminisce. Right now I’m listening to a lot of SZA who’s tunes are fabulously soothing. 

At the end of the day, grief is a difficult thing. There is no one right way to grieve and oftentimes one person’s grief looks completely different than another’s. We have to acknowledge that grief takes time and we need to be patient with ourselves throughout the process. Just like the title of the book above, it’s ok not to be ok sometimes, but together, we can persevere as a community. At a time like this, we realize just how strong the Natick community is when we come together to honor a life. 

Resource Links

School Psychologists

• Ms. Casey

• Ms. Kanavas-DeRocher

• Ms. Whittaker

School Resources

• School Resource Document

External Resources

• Seven Hills

• Jeff’s Place

Media

• Grief Out Loud Podcast

• GriefCast Podcast

Tips and Guides

• BMC guide

• Dougy Center Guide