Bad Translations
At a Budapest zoo: “PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty”
Hotel in Acapulco: “The Manager has Personally Passed All the Water Served Here” Car rental brochure, Tokyo: “When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.”
On an Athi River highway: “TAKE NOTICE: When this sign is under water, this road is impassable.”
In an East African newspaper: “A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.”
Hotel lobby, Bucharest: “The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a New Zealand restaurant: “Open seven days a week, and weekends too.”
Restaurant window: “Don’t stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up.”
Hotel elevator, Paris: “Please leave your values at the front desk.”
A menu in Vienna: “Fried milk, children sandwiches, roast cattle, and boiled sheep.”
At a Korean restaurant in Auckland, New Zealand: “We do not re-use the food.”
Supermarket, Hong Kong: “For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient self-service.”
In a Rhodes tailor shop: “Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.”
A sign on a car in Manila, Philippines: “Car and owner for sale.”
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen: “We take your bags and send them in all directions.”
War museum on the River Kwai, Thailand: “The Museum is building now — sorry for the visitor”
In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: “Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.”
Instructions for a soap bubble gun: “While solution is not toxic it will not make child edible.”
Detour sign in Kyushu, Japan: “Stop: Drive Sideways.”
Sign at Mexican disco: “Members and non-members only.”
Japanese hotel room: “Please to bathe inside the tub.”
Instructions on a Korean flight: “Upon arrival at Kimpo and Kimahie Airport, please wear your clothes.”
Aeroflot advert: “Introducing wide boiled aircraft for your comfort.”
Belgrade hotel elevator: “To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.”
Athens hotel: “Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.”