Let me start this story off by saying that Dean Brown is obsessed with romance novels. He has a whole collection of them. He trained himself when he was nine not to sleep so he could spend every waking hour reading his books.

So imagine his utter dismay when his entire collection went missing! Turns out Mr. Mike loves romance novels even more than Dean Brown. So, one night, when he feeds Rocky the Turtle, he sneaks out in the dead of night to steal the Deans romance novels.

The next day, when Dean Brown returns to the school after re-reading the entire Twilight series, all he sees is a foul-smelling flake of unidentified material. He goes into a rage, tearing up everything in the office (including a picture of Mr. Roche and Ms. Bruce--that's important so remember that). His attention lands on the flake. What is it? He gasps. TURTLE FOOD! MR MIKE!

So, when school ends with another one of his infamous “Productive days”, Dean Brown starts prowling the empty halls in search of a certain soon-to-be-fired Science teacher. However, Mr. Mike has caught on and hid in the belfry. That’s when Mr. Mike, ascending the staircase, sees Dean Dameon hunched over a bubbling cauldron, cages of sixth graders chained to the ceiling while exit tickets littered the floor. 

Dean Dameon turned to see Mr. Mike back away slowly but he had already seen too much. However, this Dean knew what to do with eyewitnesses. He picked up Mr. Mike and threw him to a deserted island. Thank god. That was a close one. But now he was tired. Weak. That’s around the time that Dean Brown bursts through the door looking for "The Fault in Our Stars."

Dean Dameon scanned the room. All the deserted islands were occupied. So he did the first thing that he could think of... he shoved Dean Brown into the cauldron. 

But now what? He was finally alone. Then, he tripped. Straight Into the cauldron. And if you know your chemistry, you know that Deans don't mix. There was a noise so loud it was completely silent. Suddenly, the belfry exploded.