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Lay features on the cover of Vogue January 2019. In this interview, he discusses his music, debuting in the US with NAMANANA, what "breakthrough" means to him, and more.
Images: Vogue Weibo
Scans: 张艺兴访谈记录博
Translation: eternallyixing (Reposted with permission)
Words above Yixing read: Zhang Yixing who is sitting on the roof, the gaze he directs into the camera reveals full determination
Zhang Yixing | Chasing The Dream
Talent, reputation, influence, commercial value, everything the outside world thinks he has all disappear in Zhang Yixing’s heart once the stage lights turn off, like a dream. He has to start over time and again like he doesn’t have it all.
From 2016 to 2017, with high sales and good reputation of one album after another, they did not exchange an opportunity for a solo concert for Zhang Yixing.
In actual fact, the release of his first solo album <Lose Control> in 2016 reached 250,000 sales in 7 days; the release of <Sheep> after 1 year sent him to 9th place on iTunes global albums chart, making him the first Chinese singer to enter Top 10 (on iTunes). But until now, the scene of a solo concert is only just an illusion in his mind, Zhang Yixing says: “If that day comes, at the very last song of the concert, I will definitely cry.”
But he knows that day is about to come.
At the end of the interview, it’s evident Zhang Yixing has already removed his thick suit of armour, he allowed the weariness to crawl up to his face, his head is slightly bent down, there are often pauses in between asking questions and answering questions, sometimes his gaze is fixated on the floor.
Just before this, he even used his English name “Lay Zhang” to joke around, “tired, and have to open wide” (tired/累 = lèi rhymes with Lay and open/张 = zhāng), if he had to change his name, what will he be called? Zhang Yixing says why not call himself ‘Happy’.
“Happy is happy, how nice! Happiness can infect everyone, he can be happy, everyone who sees him can also be happy, this is the essence of happiness. And I feel the most important thing in a person’s lifetime is happiness.”
Zhang Yixing gradually realises that living till the age of 27, the happiness he has gotten is too little.
“Maybe others think Zhang Yixing won’t be able to do it, but I am able to do it, I want to show the world; show the world that once didn’t believe in me, I am able to produce achievements, produce results.”
On the night of 18th October 2018, he’s unable to sleep. After the sky turns bright, his third album <NAMANANA> is about to welcome the market’s and listeners’ inspection, nervousness and uneasiness have made this night incomparably difficult to withstand.
10+ days ago, he officially “debuted” in the USA and had an English interview for Build Series on 2nd November at 4pm in the afternoon, and it’s also a live stream throughout. “Just do it!” Zhang Yixing laughs, if not what is there to do? He supports himself countless of times to accept challenges, the pits that he thought he might not be able to cross over are crossed over in this kind of unceremonious process just like that, he has long gotten used to it. Zhang Yixing always habitually envisions the outcome of things pessimistically, this is also roughly a very important element of the advanced mode of his “perpetual motion machine”.
The PlayStation Theater located nearby New York Times Square takes up 4180 square meters and is able to fit 2000+ people, on the 4th day of advancing into the North American market, Zhang Yixing held his Fans Event here. Before he gets to see the audience of different skin colours using the stage’s lights, he thinks “500 people came?”. The blocked street that is packed full of people queuing up and some fans who made beds on the floor because they want to reserve the front spots, these are later heard by Zhang Yixing from the staff who talked about it. “That day’s feelings……. the stage is too small, I want to stand on a concert stage to meet everyone and bring my music to them.” This is his conviction time and again.
Actually, before publicity officially began, Zhang Yixing had already held a face-to-face with strangers listening event. The situation is simple, Zhang Yixing will be face-to-face with the listener, the listener will put on earphones and listen to the songs in the new album, Zhang Yixing will hold a notebook and seriously record, the contents of what he records include: what kind of expression appears on the other party’s face at what timing; does this song catches the listener’s ear in the first 10 seconds etc.
“Music, nice to listen to means nice to listen to, not nice to listen to means not nice to listen to, average means average. There’s nothing such as: ah, this is too high class that I don’t understand what I’m listening to. That actually means it’s not nice to listen to, that is tactful rejection.”
He says everyone has a basic listening feel, “I hope that the songs I make can satisfy every listener’s basic listening feel, if there’s any part that exceeds your imagination, that I feel is a bonus to me.”
“I feel that I’m still in the process of accumulating, I also see, for example, the resonance my music brings to everyone maybe still isn’t enough, so I’m still looking for a reason, I’m always saving bit by bit and have never stopped. Yes, I wish there was a golden song that will be able to shake all the people on Earth.”
Albert Camus once wrote: People who usually choose to dedicate their lives to the Arts are extraordinary. However, he will soon realise that his own art, his own uniqueness, is often rooted in the similarity of humans.
Zhang Yixing did not talk wildly, he only did what he was supposed to do.
The misery of waking up
Being an undoubtedly top influential artist, he always has an absolute commercial value and steady artistic level, as well as fans who accompany and are together with him constantly, a small action readily exchanges him something earth-shattering. However, Zhang Yixing says, till today, he still feels like his two hands are empty.
The things he once had and currently have, won’t they bring him even the slightest satisfaction?
Also as the member of the group, after a concert is over and he returns to his room, other than the laptop, music and phone by his side, he feels he has nothing.
“I just faced so many screams and cheers, I’m grateful for everyone, but after returning to my room, I’m alone.”
“Everything you see, all the things you see, they may not be true, after you find out, actually your heart is empty, you’ll ask yourself ‘what exactly are you doing’?’”
Zhang Yixing ruthlessly wakes himself up from what others see as a beautiful dream many times, he knows he needs to be awake and embrace the changes initiated.
“I am someone who will continuously work hard for perfection, but I am also continuously convincing myself to embrace change, it brings me shock, pain and uneasiness. I only didn’t say it back then, I’m saying it now: I’m very miserable.”
“Actually what defeats you, in the end, isn’t people, it’s the market, this is the law. This is a very cruel thing, I want to learn to accept it, or do different things that are out of the ordinary, but I don’t know what I’m able to do.”
Zhang Yixing rarely directly judges whether others’ works are good or bad when he participates in any programme, his harshness is directed inwardly most of the time. For example, he has his own interpretation and pursuit of M-pop (he understands it as Mix Mandarin Pop, it’s using Chinese as the main language and combined with another language, as a form of expression).
For this goal, he will precisely analyse the new album for any shortcomings, for example, mixing (of music) stage, he’s supposed to be by the mixing teacher’s side together to adjust but he’s forced to be away due to work arrangements and he can only communicate (with the mixing teacher) through emails and his phone, so actually a lot of parts can be improved. Especially after experiencing one round of testing the waters of the North American market, he sees the problem within.
Zhang Yixing admits the impact he receives, by stopping at the domestic market and putting himself within a comfortable zone, isn’t as big anymore. “I just thought of taking everything I’ve learned for the past few years and bringing them out and compete.”
“I feel that I’m still in the process of accumulating, I also see, for example, the resonance my music brings to everyone maybe still isn’t enough, so I’m still looking for a reason, I’m always saving bit by bit and have never stopped.”
Change
Around the year 2016, Zhang Yixing saw an article posted online about himself, the length of the article wasn’t long, there were some feelings toward Zhang Yixing written. Initially, he was kind of indignant, he felt that (this person wrote as if they) really understood him between the words, until today he doesn’t know who the exactly the author is. But as time passes, he is more and more convinced of the credibility of those words.
He remembers a part of the article that said something along the lines of “it said that I did my utmost and made the greatest effort to cater to others; that I wanted to join this group, it said Zhang Yixing is a good person, but he makes people feel awkward.”
“I wish to live life a bit more relaxed now. Others say I’m pretending, say I’m fake. Yeah, I never said I don’t pretend, never said I’m not fake. I’m now telling you all my thoughts very frankly. I believe that real good and beauty exists in the world, but I also did not accomplish what others have said to be perfection, I’m willing to show my most imperfect side up until now to everyone.”
When asked what’s the change he fears the most, he said:
“Fans leaving me, but I also clearly know that one day they will leave.” Zhang Yixing personally tears away the last layer of self-defense that he depends on, “I’m selfish, I’m very selfish, I hope that my fans won’t leave me, I don’t want to iterate, why should I iterate? I’m still working hard, my dream has not been reached.”
He says he wants to let fans accompany him as he fights battles; as he conquers every corner of the world and does different miraculous things.
“Maybe others think Zhang Yixing won’t be able to do it, but I am able to do it, I want to show the world; show the world that once didn’t believe in me, I am able to produce achievements, produce results”
So what exactly is Zhang Yixing chasing?
Yixing: Chasing a dream
“Will the dream leave you?”
Yixing: It’s originally something that doesn’t exist
“It’s there, you can’t see it?”
Yixing: I can’t see it, I only know I want to chase it, I want to catch it, I wish to stand on the Grammy stage and perform, perform M-pop.
He says the thing he hates the most about himself is that he’s not confident, the thing he likes the most about himself is that he works hard. Zhang Yixing hasn’t reconciled with himself till today, two Zhang Yixings fight inside his body. His way of thinking that has formed over 20 plus years and the him who is imprisoned are not things that can be smashed at the first moment. Fortunately, the signs of wanting to break out from the siege have appeared.
The photo shoot takes place in a three-storey small building in an alley, the sun shines on the roof of the courtyard, a breath of warm and peaceful air. A glimmer of light flickers on Zhang Yixing and supermodel Tatum Marchetti’s faces, the pair seems to be infected by this light, they reveal warm and tranquil smiles. The winter in Beijing may have sunlight but it is still cold, the cold wind blows hard that he’s about to shiver. Zhang Yixing keeps saying he isn’t cold, yet he still urges the staff by his side to help drape on more clothes on the model during breaks in between the shoot, we see the gentle side of this warm-hearted man. The inspiration for the shoot came from the movie <The Boy Who Could Fly>, the big film has elements that are full of love and imagination throughout. With the collision of colours on the clothes, it allows every photo to display a strong visual impact. The two people who have never worked together before are unexpectedly relaxed throughout the shoot, fully invested in it. White doves fly by over the roof occasionally, the film camera doesn’t stop flashing in the photographer’s hand, everything seems harmonious and beautiful.
Words on the bottom left of the page read: With the photographer’s countdown, Zhang Yixing throws the clothes in his hands into the air, the photographer tries his best to catch every moment of Zhang Yixing’s subtle and refreshing expression while the clothes fall.
New year new Zhang Yixing
What kind of image management breakthrough does the Zhang Yixing who always emphasises on “Breakthrough” want to have?
Q: Now you have a lot of identities, Singer, Actor, you also tried hosting, how does your different physical appearance match your different identities in the different transitions?
Yixing: Physical appearance, I’ll rely on the stylist~ I’ll also chat with them myself, but one’s a master in their own field, they are all experts, they’re much more capable than I am. If I do it myself, I’ll take a clip and clip my hair as high as the sky, how happy~
Q: So which image in which condition of yours do you like the best?
Yixing: Actually, to me, all these presentations of images are all me, they’re just me in multi-dimensions. I normally hear people say ‘actually you seem to be like this, seem to be like that’ but actually no one can define how someone is like, everyone has multi-dimensional sides, multi-dimensional image, so I feel this is very hard to say.
Q: But Libras normally expect a lot in their physical appearance, do you?
Yixing: Yeah, I feel that as long as it’s not too unkempt, it’s fine, for example, not showering before going out is indeed letting the audience down.
Q: Previously in an interview, you mentioned “breakthrough”, in the new year, what kind of breakthroughs will there be in your physical appearance?
Yixing: I feel physical changes is not called a breakthrough, for example changing of hair colour or make-up. Mainly it’s my character and personality breakthrough, it’s because ever since I debuted at age 6, starting from filming tv dramas, till now I’m 27 going to be 28 soon, my own life’s environment has been pretty dull, every day is about work, basically no rest. I kind of want myself to feel how life is like now, go out and play, look around. (Sings: the world outside is very amazing) I want to be another Zhang Yixing, the Zhang Yixing I’ve never been before for the past 20+ years.
Q: So you’re ready to set yourself free?
Yixing: Ay, yes, I like this phrase. Ever since I said “set myself free”, my studio’s little companions are like ants on a hot pan, I see them being busy here and there.
Q: Let’s talk about skincare next, in the new year, do you have any plans for skincare management?
Yixing: Image management plan is to continue endorsing Biotherm Homme Men’s because it is a skincare brand that I deeply love, I’d have been using it for 11 years once it reaches 2019, it really is a kind of fate.
Q: How did you come into contact with this brand then?
Yixing: I was at a departmental store when I saw a very big Biotherm Homme ad with Takeshi Kaneshiro on it, but I didn’t know what it was. After that, during New Year I used new year’s money and bought a green coloured facial cleanser, I would only squeeze a little bit to use each time because I felt that it was very expensive and my heart ached.
Q: You never would have thought that you would become an endorser 11 years later in the end?
Yixing: There are really too many things that I never would have thought of.
Q: How much time do you spend on skincare every day now?
Yixing: Not long, 5-10 minutes~
Q: What kind of skincare products do you use?
Yixing: My skin leans toward the dry side, sometimes it’s also easier to become oily, my skin’s condition isn’t good occasionally because of huge stress. I always use Biotherm Homme’s Aquapower series’ products, all in all, it suits my skin, and it’s very simple. The cleanser cleans well and the gel is fresh and hydrating.
Q: Let’s talk about body management, I feel artists have it pretty hard when it comes to body management.
Yixing: After becoming an artist, I often want to ask one “why?”. For example, when I want to eat something, I’m afraid of becoming fat, and that won’t do. You see, it’s most interesting is when my fans say “Yixing, you’re too skinny, eat more.” After I eat just a little bit more, fans say “Zhang Yixing you became fat!” So what do you want me to do?
Q: It’s like that after choosing this occupation, are you exercising now?
Yixing: Exercise when it’s time to exercise, sometimes I just exercise when I have no time to exercise, I have no choice but to control my food and drinks intake.
Q: Last question, a lot of artists release their own beauty products using their own name if you could design, what would you hope for them to be like?
Yixing: I feel I won’t involve myself in skincare products, I feel I have to get the “artist” part right first. I believe everyone has their own destiny, if God sends you to do this, then walk this way first, see how well you fare. So, for skincare products I’ll continue using Biotherm Homme Men’s, I won’t be able to understand if I design them myself.
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