The Field Where I Died

It doesn't happen very often. Only a handful of times in the entire series. So when Mulder calls Scully by her first name, it's pretty significant. Mulder is questioning himself and he needs to understand where he stands with Scully. I think this is his way of opening himself to her completely, showing her that nothing comes between them, not even names.

Whenever "Dana" appears in Mulder's mouth, you know that he's very emotional.

He is so overwhelmed by emotions, in this episode...

This scene at the end where Melissa drinks the poison as Mulder rushes to her, only to arrive too late, is very powerful but, honestly, it's more than I can bear.

I don't know why but the opening and ending scenes are so poignant for me. There is the beautiful field, a nice photography, the powerful Mark Snow's music, and Mulder, just standing there, enthralling me with his voice reciting this poem. I don't even understand well the text, with its complex words and grammar, but I feel all the emotions and I want to hug and comfort Mulder !

Maybe, it's not even Mulder that I see, just David Duchovny, as, well... I've read his novels and listened to his audiobooks... power of words.

Time after time Mulder and Scully are physically very close in this episode, conveying to anyone who had a doubt that really nothing can come between them.

I couldn't choose between these three moments, where they speak to each other so closely and intimately, among other people. Are they unnoticed by the others ? Do you imagine seeing two people doing that in a meeting at your office ?

Melissa's child personality broke the tension with this much-needed laugh.

There's a lack of humor in this episode, Mulder being completely out of himself. Hopefully, Scully lightens our mood with her line about the Flukeman. Well done Scully, you have succeeded to make Mulder smiles !

We know from the start of the episode that Mulder is feeling a connection to the location, but it's still a surprise to hear Melissa/Sarah tell Mulder that this is the field where she watched him die.

It's the moment where you understand why Mulder was attracted by the field and this woman. It's quite surprising to have this strong connection between Mulder and the case they investigate (outside the mythology). But it's not the first and last time we see it, especially when it involves young women.

Melissa's line reflects the title The Field Where I Died, a beautiful title in its own.

The American Civil War plays heavily into the setting and the story. It's interesting seeing Scully dig through old records to find out more about the events that occurred and the people involved.

Of course, never heard before of the Missionary Ridge Battle ! I only know a few things about American Civil War, mostly through films. We don't study it in french schools.

By the way, in the background, we can see a yellow school bus, so american to me !

Mulder asks Scully if she would have done anything differently if she knew they had been friends in past lives. She reassures him, and us, that the path they're on now is the one that matters to her, and she wouldn't change a day.

There's a few episode where Scully reassures Mulder that she "wouldn't change a day". No matter if past lives exist or not, they are soulmates, period.

I'm not someone who enjoys or appreciates poetry. I'm just not wired that way. But I can appreciate that Mulder, needing an outlet for his feelings, stands in a field reciting poetry with so much emotion.

I don't even know what Mulder expected to do there, running into the compound like a superhero. We know that he does foolish actions sometimes. At least, we can admire his courage, or make a funny horrified face likewise Scully.

Scully's compassion for Melissa is beautiful. She is intent on investigating the case they are working, but not at the expense of Melissa's well-being.

Scully is worried about Mulder mental state, and tries to keep him in rational paths. I like upset Scully telling Mulder what's wrong in his attitude, especially the car scene.

To be honest, after I finished watching the episode I realized I hadn't found a link to another episode, and I couldn't bring myself to go back and watch again to find one. So I went with the obvious. But poor flukey!

There are a lot of parallels between this episode and Monday. A critical situation and squad forces in the beginning, Mulder's paranormal recognition of Melissa/Pam, the philosophical discussions about paths, fate, free will, hope and desire to have a second chance (by past lifes, déja vu, or iterative days), the special bond between Mulder and Melissa/Pam, their deaths (Mulder and the women), Mulder's sadness in the end, looking on the pictures/the newspaper.

Though, both mood are completely different. Monday is such a brilliant episode, powerful, with a lot of humor in it.

Rob Bowman's direction created a visually stunning episode.

I love this episode, its romantic sad mood, highlightened by the sceneries, the photography, the direction, and Mark Snow's music.

The gif I put here illustrates the way Mulder is attracted by the glass door in the compound, travels through the corridor, meets Melissa, and then become completely entangled in a purely overwhelming situation. Like Alice passing through the rabbit hole ! Then are following a lot of moving/sad Mulder's face close-ups. You can collect them, but don't go through a depression !

I dislike this episode intensely. I used to dislike the idea that Mulder had a soulmate other than Scully, but in the way it's presented here, that no longer bothers me. What I can't get past is the idea of past lives. I don't believe in it, and there's just not enough ambiguity in this story to make it palatable for me.

I heard Kristen Cloke say in an interview with The X-Cast that she approached the role of Melissa as someone with multiple personalities/dissociative identity disorder, and I can see that in her performance. But the only explanation for Mulder's connection to the place is reincarnation. I thought maybe he located the bunker in the opening scene because he had been observant and used a combination of knowledge and intuition. But that doesn't explain how he would know the names of the people who died there during the war. The only explanation is past lives, and I just can't buy into that.

Then on top of everything else, we end with a mass suicide.

There're things I don't really like in the episode. First, the overacted characters, too much gestures and affectations. Second, I don't like the nazi regression part, unnecessary for the plot and too illogical, and the easy termination of the session by "My soul is tired". Okay Mulder, but you are fierce, you can push your soul a bit more and tell us where are the bunkers ! Moreover, I don't understand why Melissa isn't dead in the end. Is it just to have suspense while Mulder is approaching ? And finally, where are all the children ? I don't see any among the dead. Was it because they didn't want to be censured ?