It’s 7:00 a.m. on a frosty winter morning and my dad and I are walking down the hallway of Alden Intermediate School. We reach the principal’s office, and my dad sets his steaming coffee on the windowsill that looks into his room as he searches his pockets for his keys. My eyes follow the coffee thermos, and I lock eyes with the black and white face of Robin Williams hung against the window. Next to the picture is a speech bubble that reads “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.”
While the picture itself is new, the quote is familiar. Any time I complain about a classmate, friend, or even sibling, my dad repeats that exact quote. It has always been his favorite, and he uses it to teach his students and children the importance of compassion. Whenever I try to complain about the latest annoyance in my life, my dad stops me and recites the quote. I sit quietly in reflection.
The lessons my dad taught me about compassion have been invaluable. His job as principal helps me understand his commitment to unconditional kindness because he’s seen its effects firsthand. It’s hard to fully comprehend what a person is going through, because most times it’s impossible to even know. I learned from him that it’s not necessarily about understanding; it’s about helping someone fight their battle, even if you don’t know what it is.
Battles often happen behind the scenes, so you need to trust that you’ve made a positive difference. The occasional reward of finding out you’ve helped makes this uncertainty worth it. Most times, just the possibility of helping someone is enough.
Last year, I added a new club to my portfolio: Big Brother Big Sister, which gathers high school students to play games and do crafts with young children in need of a positive influence. Prior to joining, I wasn’t sure what the club was even about. Now, in my second year of membership, I take advantage of the opportunity to help with every monthly meeting. I’ll never know what undeserved battles the kids face after leaving each meeting, but I can trust that by giving them a piece of my time, I’ve helped them.
During my freshmen cross country season, and my first year on the varsity team, I was the one in a battle I needed help fighting. That fall, I faced races that ate up every ounce of mental and physical strength in me. During one race, I noticed my legs feeling heavier than usual and my lungs desperate for air. It was one of the hardest races I’d ever run. I’m not sure I would’ve crossed the finish line if it weren’t for one of the team’s seniors cheering me on, even while she was racing too. She wasn’t the fastest on the team, or even a captain, but her shouts of encouragement echoed through the woods from behind me the entire race. Because of her, I won that battle.
Even though it’s difficult to think through your emotions when it’s easier to leave the situation, I’ll forever be grateful that my dad taught me to do so. Someday it will all pay off, whether it’s through the reward of seeing someone else happy or facing a personal battle. I hope to implement this mindset into my career as an architect, aiming to create environments that benefit its population, in addition to focusing on aesthetics. You don’t always know the battles someone is facing, but you always have the chance to help them fight.