Get used to the English conversation style and how they may try to get to know you; frequently they will use indirect questions when seeking personal information to allow the other person to respond or not, as it suits them. For example, instead of directly asking where you work or what you do for a living they may make a comment about traffic and ask if you drive to work yourself. This gives the other person the option to either only answer the question directly asked or give more information. If you’re interested in getting to know them further, use these opportunities to let out a few more personal details. Avoid asking for personal information directly yourself, and try using these same methods. Try using open-ended questions instead of simply telling the other person your opinions and views and watch out for key signals you’ve pushed too far, such as monosyllabic answers and the other person looking “squirmy” or uncomfortable.

While gossip may be seen as frivolous or frowned upon in many cultures and seem contrary to their value of privacy, the English may use it as a forum to discuss other issues or seek personal information and views as well. Keep in mind that the more distant you are from the person you are sharing gossip with, the more distant the people you talk about should be (for instance, for an acquaintance you do not know well, celebrity gossip is more suitable). While gossip is quite common, part of the fun is it feels a little “taboo.” It’s appropriate to speak in excited or hushed tones and display an appropriate amount of shock over the details shared, particularly for females.

It has been humorously pointed out that the English often refer to it as “saying our goodbyes” in the plural as opposed to the singular for good reason. Some visitors may be surprised just how long this goodbye process can be, both on the phone and in person. While in group situations no one wants to be last to leave or overstay their welcome, they also do not want to appear overeager to part. Similarly, if you leave too quickly or don’t display reluctance to depart (such as expressing what a wonderful time you had and making comments that you must do it again), it may be seen as rather abrupt.

Keep in mind the English value of modesty, but don’t mistake it for a lack of pride or a lack of competitiveness. Although they may present their achievements, accomplishments, and skills in a self-deprecating, offhand, or understated way (such as comparing being a brain surgeon negatively to being a plumber), it’s not inappropriate to be impressed or to recognize and compliment them. Never brag directly and when it comes to compliments, utilize a practice of returning rather than accepting. Instead of accepting a compliment, it’s common to make a self-deprecatory remark or negate the compliment while following it up with a related compliment to the other person. The English can also be seen to engage in “competitive modesty” or “one-downmanship”, where they humorously point out their own failures or how they are, in fact, much worse at something than the other person. Try using this yourself and learn to make light of your failures and mistakes.

Avoid making scenes, “kicking up a fuss”, or being unnecessarily loud and emotional in most situations. Being vocal in expressing your dissatisfaction or irate in your criticisms may make your English friends a bit uncomfortable or be seen as rude (for example if you are not pleased with the food or service in a restaurant).

It’s seen as good manners to bring a gift when you are invited to someone’s home, such as for dinner. Common gifts are wine, flowers, or chocolate, and they don’t necessarily need to be expensive. Inviting someone out is a nice way to show appreciation or get to know someone; in these situations, it may be considered polite to offer to pay although the other person may insist otherwise. Additionally, round buying, where one person buys drinks for everyone, is quite common when in a group at a pub. Offer and take a turn buying a round, too; note that including the barkeeper in the round is also seen as a way of tipping and showing appreciation, though they may not always accept. Be sure that if you constantly go out without paying your share people will notice, even if they don’t comment on it directly.